They decide to meet and Bren's secret has to come out.
She was taking a long time to respond. I was growing more and more impatient. I never should have asked. With each passing second, more and more regret was bubbling under the surface. I was about to IM her and tell her that I had to go and just… make up some kind of an excuse or IM her, telling her that I was kidding. Yeah, that would work, right? Yeah, it had to. I then saw it say ‘BrennyBear has entered text’ and my breath caught in my throat again. She had stopped writing. She wasn’t responding anymore.
And then I realized I couldn’t do it anymore. I shut my laptop and sat back. I pushed away from it and called Spencer. He picked up and I immediately started talking, “Spencer, I can’t do it! I tried to offer to be her boyfriend, but she was taking too long to respond. So I just shut my laptop. What if I made a mistake? What if she hates me? What if I messed up everything!”
“Jesus, Ryan. You’re an idiot. You finally get a girl to like you and you shit in her face by shutting your laptop. Open it back up and claim something about internet failure and say you didn’t get her IM. She likes you. From what you’ve told me, she likes you.”
“What if she says no? What if she was taking a long time because she wanted to think of a nice way to say no? When it’s just going to hurt me!”
“Wow. Are you a girl now, Ryan? When did that happen?”
“I’m not a girl!”
“Then quit acting like one and open your fucking computer!”
“…Okay,” I slowly pulled my laptop back open and waited for AIM to come back up again, sign me back on. When it did, she immediately IMed me.
‘Everything ok? You disappeared.’
I hesitated, “She asked if I’m okay,” I murmured quietly. I wasn’t sure how to respond. If I told her the truth, she’d laugh in my face and tell me that I was right. She didn’t want to be my girlfriend. That she never liked me.
‘Yeah. Internet just died for a minute.’
‘Oh. Hate when that happens. Here’s my response to your question. I thought you signed off because I was taking so long. Sorry about that, by the way. My dog wanted to be fed.’ And then immediately another IM. ‘You want to be my boyfriend? I never even knew you liked me. I guess that just goes to show how thick I am! :P I also never thought you’d like someone like me. You’ve shown me pictures of the girls you’ve dated, so it just comes as a shock. But yeah, I’d love for you to be my boyfriend. :)’
I dropped the phone and felt my heart squeeze a little. In a good way though. I smiled and bit my lip. Yay! I quickly responded ‘Well, what do you look like? I doubt you’re less attractive than your personality.’ I joked.
‘Short brown hair, brown eyes, kind of an olive tone skin, I’m 5’8” on a bad day. Lol. Not sure what else to say. But the girls you like usually are blonde, 5’6”, and skinny.’
I laughed a little ‘You sound cute to me.’
And that’s how Bren and I became boyfriend-girlfriend. From that day on, I went to work in a much better mood and I’d tell Spencer about everything. She and I got along so well, it was like we were meant for each other. I’d even told her that on some occasions. She agreed with me.
I was beginning to doubt that Ryan knew I was a guy. I was pretty sure he thought I was a girl. How to break the news to him? I wasn’t entirely sure. He and I never video chatted or voice chatted. We did eventually exchange numbers, but we never talked on the phone. He’d had girlfriends—many of them, in fact. And he thought I was a girl. He never did ask what Bren was short for though. And I wasn’t going to tell him. As soon as he’d find out it was short for Brendon, well, then he’d know I was a guy.
Things would go to shit. When he asked to be my boyfriend, I have to admit that I was kind of excited about it, but I realized he’s not gay. He just thought I was a girl. Honestly, the more and more we talked, sometimes I felt like maybe I should get a sex change for him. Get boobs and remove the penis. Can’t be that hard.
‘RyRo1990: It’s funny that we live in the same city and have never met!’
We had. We’d met several times. But he didn’t know. He’d never piece it together. He even knew my name was Brendon. I’d come to his computer shop a few times because I really wasn’t the best with computers. We’d become kinda good friends. When he finally showed me a picture, I realized that I had known him. Weird, I know. But I wasn’t about to tell him that I knew who he was. He’d ask who I was and how come I didn’t tell him earlier.
‘BrennyBear: Yeah. We should meet up. :)’
I was ready to show him who I really was. I was falling for him. Hard. And I didn’t want to fall any harder if it meant I’d lose him. I really cared about him. He meant so much to me. He kept saying that we were meant for each other. And I agreed with him every time. I never outright told him I wasn’t a girl and he never outright said I was. But I knew it’s what he thought. We’d been talking for a year at this point and I would have to say it was about time. I was pretty sure I was already in love with him. He might have been too. But he didn’t know it was me.
‘RyRo1990: Yeah! We should! You should come to my computer shop and we can go out when I get off.’
I sighed. As soon as I’d walk in, I knew exactly what he’d say: ‘Brendon! Long time no see! What’s wrong with your computer this time?’ with that quirky laugh he had. That amazing laugh. But only, this time, I’d have to tell him that I was Bren. That Bren was short for Brendon. He’d get mad. He’d get mad that I’d been apparently lying to him this whole time. But how was I supposed to tell him?
‘BrennyBear: Sure! Give me a time and I’ll make it over there. When do you want to meet?’
‘RyRo1990: I work tomorrow and get off at 5. We can go for dinner!’
I smiled sadly and hesitated. I wanted to believe that he genuinely wanted to go out to dinner with me. Me not Bren. But it wasn’t that way and I knew that. Bren didn’t exist. Well Bren existed, just not as a girl.
‘BrennyBear: Tomorrow at 5. It’s called Hi-Tek Elecs, right?’
‘RyRo1990: You got it!’
‘BrennyBear: Ok. :) I’ll see you tomorrow then! I’m so excited!’
Of which I wasn’t. Not even remotely. I knew he’d freak out, get scared, mad, anxious… There wasn’t a single bone in my body that doubted that. He’d hate me. He’d hate everything about me when he realized who I was. I was Brendon, the guy whose computer hated him.
”Welcome to Hi-Tek Elecs. How can I help you?” Ryan asked the very first time I walked in. I put my PC laptop in front of him and he opened it, realizing that it was broken in half. He laughed, “I see your problem.”
I laughed, “My computer hates me. What can I say? Can you fix it?” I gave him a shrug with a hopeful expression. And if he could, well, I’d be so happy. This was the first time I’d ever stepped foot in this place. And that was the night I met Ryan on Omegle. Only I hadn’t pieced it together until months later.
He examined it for a while and nodded, “It won’t be easy, but I can fix it and have you out of here in an hour tops.”
“Just go have a seat over there.”
I nodded and walked over and sat down. Later that night, we met on Omegle and we talked for hours on AIM. Now I remember he told me something that makes me laugh now.
‘RyRo1990: I’m tired cause I got off work late. This guy came in with a completely messed up laptop and I had to fix it. Took a lot of hard work. So I’m pretty exhausted just from that.’
If only I’d realized at that moment that he was talking about me.
“Welcome to Hi-Tek Elecs! Brendon!” he smiled. It was 4:45. I smiled back and gave him a little wave. He came over, “Long time no see! So what’s going on with your computer that hates you?” he joked. He was so happy. I loved that he was so happy. And I loved that I was the reason for that. Well, until now.
“I’m not here because of my computer.”
He blinked a few times, “Are you here to buy a new one? Did it finally completely die on you?”
“Then why are you here?”
I took a deep breath, “I’m Bren, Ryan. BrennyBear. The person you’ve been talking to for a year.”
He took a step back, “How do you know about that?”
“Short brown hair, olive skin tone, 5’8” on a bad day,” I gave him an apologetic smile. I didn’t know what to expect anymore. I knew he’d hate me, but I wasn’t sure what his reaction would be. And boy was I scared to find out.
A/N: I'm in a much better mood, so I think I'm back in the flow of writing. Thank you to those of you who helped me out in this foul time of mine. As it is, I am right on time with this story. :P Please rate and review! I hope you liked it! I kind of want to continue the rest of the story in Bren's POV because it would make it more interesting. But it is kind of Ryan's dilemma. So it might just be a changing POV story. We'll see what happens. Love you all! :)