Categories > Celebrities > My Chemical Romance > A Pause For Reflection.
Chapter Twenty.
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Chapter Twenty.
Gerard’s cruel words repeated themselves over and over, louder than the sound of the water spilling into the bathtub and the water that already half filled it. And, as much as I wanted to continue being mad at him and blame everything on him, I knew he was right.
Potentially, it is my fault I’m depressed.
It is all my fault.
I’m worthless and can’t do anything right, so it’s no surprise.
With a small, quiet sigh I reached my blood covered hand into the water and swirled it as I stared down at my tired reflection. I had no idea I looked this horrible..
Frowning, I hit my reflection to make it distorted so that I wouldn’t have to look into its mocking eyes. All the while I could feel my phone vibrating in my pocket but I already knew it was going to be Gerard, so I took my phone out of my pocket and dropped it into the bathtub; watching as its lights dimmed and its power faded.
Biting my lip and deciding that the bath tub was full enough to do the job, I turned the taps even though it hurt the gashes across my wrists before sighing. I had already decided before hand that I wasn’t going to bother taking my clothes off for this; there’s really no point.
Pulling the red hood over my head, I slipped into the bathtub.
I just seemed to sit there in the cold water for a while, letting it sting at the gashes on my wrists. They were so deep it seemed like I had tried to saw my wrists off. They were stained with red and the flesh was torn and fragile. Disgusting.
I get the feeling like something is looking down on me with disgust, knowing what I’m about to do next. Yelling that it hates me. But, I know that it’s not something. It is, in fact, myself.
With a small sigh, I slipped under the water.
The coldness of the water embedded me, and it felt comforting – Like a cold pair of arms, wrapping themselves tightly around me to the point I couldn’t breathe and see straight.
My view of the ceiling above me was blurred and I parted my lips, letting water flow into my system freely with hesitation.
Then I heard a knock on the door, which made me gasp, causing more water to flow through my lips.
I could hear the hum of a voice saying my name while I resisted the urge to sit up and cough out all the water; but I didn’t. I crushed my eyes shut and forced myself down even more.
The knocking got louder.
The darkness was overwhelming and my lungs were burning, I knew it was all going to go in a matter of seconds. The pressure was already building up in my body. I couldn’t help but feel a relieved smile run across my lips as, with one tug, the darkness took me under.
Gerard’s cruel words repeated themselves over and over, louder than the sound of the water spilling into the bathtub and the water that already half filled it. And, as much as I wanted to continue being mad at him and blame everything on him, I knew he was right.
Potentially, it is my fault I’m depressed.
It is all my fault.
I’m worthless and can’t do anything right, so it’s no surprise.
With a small, quiet sigh I reached my blood covered hand into the water and swirled it as I stared down at my tired reflection. I had no idea I looked this horrible..
Frowning, I hit my reflection to make it distorted so that I wouldn’t have to look into its mocking eyes. All the while I could feel my phone vibrating in my pocket but I already knew it was going to be Gerard, so I took my phone out of my pocket and dropped it into the bathtub; watching as its lights dimmed and its power faded.
Biting my lip and deciding that the bath tub was full enough to do the job, I turned the taps even though it hurt the gashes across my wrists before sighing. I had already decided before hand that I wasn’t going to bother taking my clothes off for this; there’s really no point.
Pulling the red hood over my head, I slipped into the bathtub.
I just seemed to sit there in the cold water for a while, letting it sting at the gashes on my wrists. They were so deep it seemed like I had tried to saw my wrists off. They were stained with red and the flesh was torn and fragile. Disgusting.
I get the feeling like something is looking down on me with disgust, knowing what I’m about to do next. Yelling that it hates me. But, I know that it’s not something. It is, in fact, myself.
With a small sigh, I slipped under the water.
The coldness of the water embedded me, and it felt comforting – Like a cold pair of arms, wrapping themselves tightly around me to the point I couldn’t breathe and see straight.
My view of the ceiling above me was blurred and I parted my lips, letting water flow into my system freely with hesitation.
Then I heard a knock on the door, which made me gasp, causing more water to flow through my lips.
I could hear the hum of a voice saying my name while I resisted the urge to sit up and cough out all the water; but I didn’t. I crushed my eyes shut and forced myself down even more.
The knocking got louder.
The darkness was overwhelming and my lungs were burning, I knew it was all going to go in a matter of seconds. The pressure was already building up in my body. I couldn’t help but feel a relieved smile run across my lips as, with one tug, the darkness took me under.
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