I felt heavy like a heavy black storm cloud filled with rain when I regained conciseness. My arm was numb because I was lying on it, so I rolled my heavy body onto my back and slowly opened my eyes to see an unformillia burry white ceiling. And, just as all my other senses began to work again, I began to hear buzzing – Machines and the patting of feet out in a hall.
It took allot of strength for me to turn my head, only to see someone that I hadn’t seen in about a year now sitting on a small wooden chair, they seemed to be struggling to keep themself awake.
“Dad..” I whispered. “Am I dead?”
My father’s eyes shot open and instantly he was sitting by the bed I was lying in. He moved my damp fringe away from my face and smiled faintly as he whispered, “No you silly goose. But you had your mother and I scared for a moment there.”
“I’m not four.. Don’t call me a silly goose..” I rolled my eyes.
My father smirked his signature smirk and tapped my cheek lightly with his hand, “You haven’t changed. You know, ever since you were thirteen you’ve been acting older than your age?”
“Is there something wrong with that?”
“Yes. You’re trying to grow up too fast and reality is just pulling you back down..” He told me, gesturing towards my wrists – which I only just realised were bandaged.
Quickly, I hid my arms underneath the pale turquoise blanket.
“Why’d you do it?” He asked.
“Why’d you walk out of my childhood?” I returned.
“That’s between your mother and I.” He sighed softly. “Besides, now isn’t about us, it’s about you.”
I nodded, pursing my lips.
“Why’d you do it?” My father asked.
I looked down and shook my head, not wanting to answer his question.
“Frank.. You’ve got to tell me this..”
I just shook my head again, but this time I hid under the blanket by pulling the covers over my head.
“Frank, you said it yourself; you’re not four.” My father sighed tugging at the blanket.
I just kept it over my head.
“Come on. Stop acting like a child.”
Curling myself into a tight ball, I shook my head frantically and crushed my eyes shut in silence.
“Frank.. Buddy..” My father groaned, trying once again to tug away the blanket.
I just tucked it under my feet, my head and basically anywhere I could stop gaps from forming and mumbled, “I don’t want to talk about this.”
“Ok.. But don’t hide yourself under the blanket like a child.” He sighed.
Slowly, I removed the blanket from over my body and uncurled my body.
Something which I soon regretted because not long after my mother walked into the room.
“Frank Iero!” She snapped. “What the hell were you thinking!?”
My father rolled his eyes and sighed as he stood up, walking over to my mother and grabbing her lightly by the arm, taking a few steps away from me as he hissed, “He’s upset and not in the mood. Leave him alone.”
“Oh, so now you suddenly care about him?” My mother hissed in reply.
“Of course I do!” My father frowned.
“Oh really? Because, if I remeber correctly, you were the one that walked out of his life!”
“I didn’t walk away from him, I walked away from you!”
Covering my ears with my hands, I once again crushed my eyes shut and curled into a tight ball; trying my hardest not to listen to their pointless arguing.
But it didn’t help.
It just got worse and eventually I snapped and forced myself to sit up.
“Shut up both of you! You’re both shitty parents! You weren’t there for most of my fucking childhood,” I snapped at my father before turning to my mother. “And you let me drop out of school. Which didn’t fucking help with my depression!”
“You let him drop out of school!?” My father growled. He clearly had no idea that I hadn’t stepped foot on school grounds for almost a year now.
“So what if I did?” My mother said, sticking her nose in the air and folding her arms across her chest. “You weren’t there to motivate him to stay in school so--”
“SHUT UP!” I yelled as loud as my worn out lungs would let me.
Suddenly, an unnatural dead silence, apart from my heavy breathing, filled the room.
My mother and my father stood looking at me. Their facial expressions stunned as if they hadn’t expected me to just snap like I had. As if they were waiting for me to do something – To tell them what to do next.
Eventually their watching eyes got to me and I just broke down in tears.
“Frank!” They gasped in synch, both of them running to either side of the hospital bed and holding me to show the comfort I so badly needed.
“I.. I just want to go home..” I cried in a whisper, looking at my father and then to my mother before burying my face in my hands. “Is that too much to ask for?”