“Slash, when last did you eat?” Axl asked him and Slash opened his eyes, a thoughtful look in his eyes. Axl waited patiently for Slash's answer,”I don't remember. I know that I've drank more ...
Axl sat at the back of the bus next to Izzy, who had his head on his shoulder and was snoring lightly. Duff was in front of Axl, whispering into the ear of some random girl, who had the most irritating laugh Axl had ever heard. Steven was chatting to the bus driver, telling him some story about him and Slash when they were younger.
Axl stared into space, trying his best to ignore what Slash was doing. He could hear the low moans and the whispering, and he knew that if he dared to look, the girl wouldn't be breathing for much longer.
The week before, Slash had taken this girl home and Axl could hear what they were doing in the next room. He could hear everything and it made him feel sick. He had to cover his ears but it still wouldn't block out the image of Slash and that girl.
They hadn't said a word to each other since that night. Slash had tried to talk to him, try to understand the reason of Axl's choice. Axl just ignored him and walked away, he wanted Slash to lost the love for him. It didn't mean he liked it that Slash was with someone else.
He knew that if he and Slash got together, it wouldn't last. Even if they tried and tried, Axl would wreck it some way or another. Axl would never let himself rest. He didn't like the feeling of relying on someone else.
Axl knew that Slash was a wreck, he could smell it. He'd slept with random girls, drinking more than normal. He would wake up and not know what or who he did the previous night. He could still play great on stage but he was a mess. You only had to look at him and know it.
The day that they got home after the tour, Axl had moved out of the room he shared with Slash and started sharing with Izzy. Slash had tried to stop him but Axl told him to back off and let him be.
“Axe, please tell me why.” Slash asked for the fourth time that hour, watching from his seat on the bed as Axl shoved his rock magazines into a box,”You tell me that you finally love me, then you leave me for no reason.
Even though they lived in the same house and Axl was going to be in the next room, Slash felt like shit. He didn't understand. Axl stopped shoving things in the box and looked over to Slash. Slash's face was wearing a confused look, like when a little boy got punished for no good reason.
“It's not your fault. It's mine, I can't be with you because I know myself. I will break you, you know what I'm like, Slash.”Axl mumbled to him and Slash looked up, still sitting on the bed,”You need someone who loves you as much as you love them,”
“I just want you. I don't want anyone else, and I never will.”Slash said to him, watching as Axl opened the door and handed his things to Izzy, who without complaining, took it to his room. Izzy knew when to keep out of Axl's business. Axl stepped over to Slash and sat next to him,”You think that, Slash. But if you got with me properly, your view would change. You've seen first hand.”
Slash opened his mouth to protest but before he could, Axl walked out of the room, closing the door behind him.
Axl felt the bus stop and he snapped out of his thoughts to realise that they were home. He stretched his limbs, smiling when Izzy, in his sleep, moaned in protest. He looked up to see Duff and his companion running out of the bus, giving Axl thumbs up.
Axl turned to Izzy and shook his shoulder,”Izzy, c'mon we're here.” Axl leaned in and whispered into his friends ear, giving him a soft wake up. Izzy hated to be woken up and if you wanted an easy life, you had to be careful. Axl didn't see Slash watching the scene, getting the wrong idea.
I knew it! Slash thought to himself and screwed his eyes shut as he followed Lisa out of the bus. She didn't mean anything to him, she was just a distraction until Axl came to his senses but he wasn't sure if that would happen. Axl and Izzy seemed close.
He knew that Axl and Izzy had always been close, but he never thought that Axl loved Izzy more than a brother. Was this the real reason that Axl left Slash? For Izzy? Shaking his head, Slash continued walking.
Walking into the house, Slash saw Steven chatting up Lisa and she didn't even notice he was there. Slash wanted to hug Steven, he had taken the girl off of his hands. She talked to much and he was getting annoyed. Slash went into the kitchen, passing Duff and his girl.
He looked in the cupboards for his Jack Daniels but it wasn't in the place that he left it. Slash groaned and he dug around in the cupboard under the sink but it wasn't there either. He needed a drink, he hadn't had one for 3 days because Duff stole the his bottle after he lost his vodka.
“I left three in here before we left!” He mumbled to himself, shoving stuff out of the way as he looked around the kitchen.
“You drank it all the day before we left,Slash.” Came a voice from above him. Slash looked up and saw Axl leaning against the opposite counter, arms crossed. Slash stood up, wiping dust off his leather trousers.
“I don't remember so I must've done.” He sighed and finally met Axl's eyes. They stood there in silence and the only noise was the TV that Izzy was watching, half passed out on the couch. Duff and Steven disappeared with the two girls. Weird enough, the four of them were in Duff's room.
“You do know that Steve has got your girl, right?” Axl finally broke the silence and Slash nodded,”I thank him, she was doing my fuckin' head in. Talks more than she does work.” Axl laughed and Slash smith for the first time in weeks. They hadn't said more then a few words to each other.
Axl looked at Slash properly, he didn't looked like he normally did. He had bags under his eyes. Axl just wanted to hug him and make it all go away. He didn't want to love Slash, he wanted to hate him, hate him for making him feel this way. He didn't want Slash to make him feel this way any more.
“I can't survive without you, Axl.”
“I need you, don't leave me.”
“I don't know what I'd do if you left me, Axl.”
Axl watched as Slash's hands shook against the counter and his eyes travelled up to his face. His heart broke when he saw tears escape Slash's eyes and Slash's lip quivered,”Axl.” Slash choked and the guitarist's legs gave out before he fell to the floor. Axl rushed over to his side, grabbing the bucket just put it in front of his face seconds before he was sick. Axl's hands held his hair back as Slash emptied his stomach.
Axl thanked God that Izzy was passed out on the couch.
“You done?” Axl whispered into his ear and Slash nodded. Pushing the bucket away, Axl leaned against the cupboard, resting Slash's head in his lap as he wiped the hair away from his sweating face. He noticed that Slash's face was pale, and he looked terrible.
“Slash, when last did you eat?” Axl asked him and Slash opened his eyes, a thoughtful look in his eyes. Axl waited patiently for Slash's answer,”I don't remember. I know that I've drank more than normal though.”
Axl sighed and stroked Slash's hair,”You hungry now?” He asked him again and Slash hid himself in Axl's side before he nodded in agreement before he allowed Axl to help him up. Axl held Slash to him as the guitarist stumbled to the bathroom to wash his face and brush the bad taste out of his mouth.
10 minutes later he came out and watched Axl move around the kitchen, getting things out of the fridge. Axl told him to sit down and put a ham sandwich and a cup of hot tea in front of him. He sat down and took small bites of his snack and he felt better when he drank the hot beverage. Axl sat across from him, drinking his coffee and watched as, slowly, colour made it's way back onto Slash's cheeks.
Slash finished his food and leaned back into the chair, drinking the rest of his tea,”Feel better?” Axl asked him after Slash put his dishes into the sink. Slash nodded and sat back down.”You really need to cut back on the drinking,Slash. It's going to kill you.”
Slash let out a breath and looked at Axl's worried face,”Why do you care? You caused all of this. Messing with me and my fucking head. You told me you loved me then you left me for no reason, no explanation and expected me to deal with it. This is your fault, Axl. I love you and you know how to play that.” He said with so much emotion that Axl could hear his voice break and tears welled up in Slash's eyes,”But I don't want you to leave me. Please, come back.”
Axl didn't say anything. Standing up, he walked right past Slash and into his bedroom without looking at Slash. The guitarist sat there, looking into space before he went to his room himself.