Gerard's given up so much for one touch. One kiss. One smile...
Gerard sat hunched in the corner of his bedroom, the house as empty as his heart. It wasn't meant to happen like this. Frank was supposed to tell him he felt the same, they were supposed to hold one another, love one another, become one. Gerard couldn't even cry. He couldn't even cry.
Outside of the dark room was a world where Frank lived. Frank was happy, even though he knew he wouldn;t talk to his best friend again - at least not for a while. He couldn't believe Gerard had betrayed him like that. But he didn;t regret the black eye he gave Gerard. As far as he was concerned, it was deserved.
Gerard's eye didn't hurt; he couldn't feel it over the ache in his heart. Distracting daydreams had become distant, fading memories that echoed endlessly in Gerard's head. It was terrifying for him. He wanted to rid himself of Frank, but he couldn;t. He loved Frank, he needed Frank. He wanted to pull himself to his feet and find the other man, but he didn't have the will too. He didn;t even have the motivation to get into his bed, so why would he go searching for Frank, the one that put him in this state? Gerard looked uo at the bed opposite him, but then ignored any thoughts about the soft bed and the protective blanket, the things that could shelter him for a while. It wasn't worth it, however, Gerard concluded. The pain would still be there, no matter where he was.
Gerard imagined Frank holding him, their fingers laced together, entwined as one. He imagined them together. A single teardrop fell from his closed eyes as he surrendered himself to a wave of unwanted, yet needed sleep.