Pheonix didn't matter to him anymore. He didn't want to be with her, he wanted Acid and Acid alone.
Chapter Fifty Six - Stop
It was an emotional time for all of them saying goodbye to Curse, Violet, Blondie, Sunny, Storm, Light and Bel. It was particularlly emotional for Violet and Curse, but they tried not to let it show.
Bandit was taking hard since she didn't want any of them to leave. She just clung to Curse's chest all day and started calling her a koala bear since she held on to him like there was no tomorrow.
The only time Bandit let go of Curse was when her mother or father wanted her, but even then she was extremely reluctant to leave him. That just told everyone how much she didn't want them to leave and it was breaking Curse's heart.
After Curse had barely managed to convince Bandit to go play with her cousins since Curse had to talk to her mother, he pulled Acid to one side to talk to her privately.
She smiled sadly at him, wishing he didn't have to leave her and the rest of the Killjoys for a second time.
"I know this may sound bitchy and pessimistic, but I'm almost one hundred percent sure that this information about Silk is faulty. Hopefully, it'll be proved that it's faulty not long after we've been there so I can come back and see you again, but incase I don't, I just wanna say that I really really care about you. I know we don't know whether we're friends, if we're friends who seem to kiss occassionally or dare I say, in a relationship, but whatever it is, I care about you. Fuck, I even wanna be with you, but I understand that it's complicated between you and Poison. You have a history with him and you have Bandit together, but I just want you to consider a relationship with me. If you really don't want to be with me after you've thought about that, I still wanna be friends and I want you in my life." It took a lot for him to confess that to her.
He waited for her response for a while, but it never came. She just stared.
"Please say something." He almost begged her.
"I-I don't know what to say. I mean . . . I've wondered what we are a lot of the time too, but I just don't know."
"Do you want us to be anything or don't you know?"
"One day, maybe. I'd be a complete fucking liar if I said I wasn't attracted to you."
He smiled a huge, goofy grin that Acid had grown to love. "You're attracted to me? For real?"
She smiled and playfully rolled her icy green eyes. "Well duh, why do you think I've kissed you a few times?" She giggled slightly.
"Okay, what about me do you think's attractive?"
"First and foremost, your personality. You light up a room whenever you walk in, you've got the fuckin' goofiest, funniest smile I've ever seen, your laugh is extremely contagious, you're funny, smart, caring, supportive . . ." she trailed off. "Not to be vain, but then there's your looks. Your eyes are chocolate brown and full of excitement, I've already mentioned your smile," she started blushing slightly. "And y'know . . your body's pretty great."
He laughed. "Wow, Ace, you've got a fuckin' huge crush on me, haven't you?"
"Shut up, Mister I-want-you-to-be-in-a-relationship-with-me."
He just laughed again.
"But, then there's-"
"Please not but, just leave it at that."
"I'm sorry, but there's a but. Anyways, then there's other things. There's my daughter and Poison. I know that you love Bandit and vice versa, but I don't know how she'd handle me being in a relationship with someone else. She hates the fact that Poison sees Pheonix sometimes, but I don't know it that's just because she's a bitch or if it's because she'd rather me and Poison be together. Hell, maybe it's a little bit of both, I don't know. Then there's Poison . . . it's beyond complicated and I'm not gonna lie to you, I think there's still apart of me that loves him. The nineteen-year-old girl who's still kind of alive inside of me sometimes reminds me of why I fell in love with him in the first place and sometimes I can't help but be thankful we're not together anymore. I know those feeling'll fade with time, but I don't want you to feel like you're just a rebound or some shit like that."
"I understand that and I'm not asking you to make a decision straight away, I just want you to think about it. When I come back, you don't even have to have made your mind up. I just want you to consider a relationship with me."
She nodded. "I'll think about it, I promise."
"That's all I ask."
She wrapped her pale, slender arms around him as he wrapped his arms around her. They tightly squeezed eachother, knowing that it was possibly the last time she would see him for a while.
"I'll really miss you." She vowed.
"I know. I'll really miss you too."
She pulled away after a few moments of hugging and squeezing.
He slightly leaned in and gently pressed his lips to hers. She let him steel several kisses from her tender lips, she wanted him to steel them from her. She started kissing back, steeling a few kisses from him as pay back for the ones he'd stolen in the first place.
He pulled away, smiling.
"I'll hopefully see you soon."
"Yeah, I'll see you soon."
She stole one last kiss from him and walked him to the car that would take him away from the diner.
Bandit was brave and didn't cry after the Killjoys had left, but she wanted to stay close to both her parents. Acid and Poison didn't really have a problem with that, they understood Bandit wanted to be with both of them and it was something they probably should've been used to by that point.
They mostly played games like hide and seek, running around the diner to try and find eachother. She laughed a lot with them and it seemed to take her mind off things, so they happily played with her.
After she'd been running around for so long, she decided to sit down and so some colouring with her eldest cousin, Jeremy.
Poison took the oportunity to ask Acid something while their five-year-old daughter was distracted.
"I was thinking of going out tomorrow, could you just try to distract Bandit when I'm leaving? I don't want her to get upset over it."
"Sure, but can I ask what you're doing?"
He momentarily paused. "Promise not to get mad?"
She eyed him wearily. "That depends."
"I'm . . . Well, I-I . . . I've decided to meet up with Pheonix again."
Mild anger possed her for a split second, but she didn't make a scene.
He shrugged. "I haven't seen her in a while."
"Yeah, that was a good thing."
He ignored her comment. He didn't want to have a fight with her, the fights never did anything other than hurt their daughter and get both Acid and Poison pissed off. They didn't need either of those things.
"When are you meeting up with her?"
Her eye brows rose in shock. "Tonight? Fuck, you know you really can do better then Pheonix, right?" The question slipped out of her lips.
"What is my love life to you anyway?"
"You're the one who brought it up."
"I did, but I can tell you're judging me for it."
"I'm not judging you. If you wanna see her again, fine. It's none of my business, it's been five years since we've been together. I just think it's a little shocking that you're asking your ex, who's still slightly in love with you, to distract our daughter while you go out to meet your new fuck buddy."
His eyes widened slightly. "You're still in love with me?"
Her heart sunk, how had she let that one slip? Of all the things she could've said, that's what she let slide?
"Just forget it. I'll distract her."
"Poison, I really don't wanna talk about this right now."
"No buts. Just forget I ever said it, okay?"
He paused for a second. "If that's what you really want."
Poison hopped into the Trans Am after he's sucessfully snuck out without Bandit getting upset or even noticing that much.
He turned the radio on and tried a few chanels before something decent came on. Everlong by Foo Fighters blasted in the car, causing a smile to spread on his face. It reminded him of his wedding day since their final dance of the night was to that song.
He remembered how beautiful Lexia looked in her wedding dress and the little bumb that was present that day too. That was one of the best days of his life, even though they weren't together anymore, it was still one of the best nights he'd ever had in his time of being alive.
"Hello, I've waited here for you, everlong. To night, I throw myself into, and out of the red, out of her head she sang . . . Come down, and waste away with me, down with me . . . slow how, you wanted it to be, I'm over my head, out of her head she sang . . . And I wonder, if I sing along with you, if everything could ever feel this real forever, if anything could ever be this good agin, the only thing I'll ever ask of you, you gotta promise not to stop when I say when. She sang . . . Breath out, so I can breath you in, hold you in . . . And now, I know you've always been, out of your head, out my head I sang . . ." The music sang as Gerard and Lexia had the last dance together of their wedding day.
Gerard was holding her close to him, their arms wrapped around eachother. Her head was resting on Gerard's chest as their bodies slowly swayed to the music.
"I still can't believe we're married." He said, kissing his bride's forehead.
She smiled. "I know. I can't believe we're having baby too."
"It's all insane when you really think about it. I mean, I didn't even think I'd ever meet anyone and fall in love, yet here I am."
"There's no one else I'd rather doing this with, Gee. I can't wait to our start a life together and I'm so fucking in love with you, Gerard, and I already love our baby so so much. I'm just so happy that I'm with you and that we have this baby. I never thought I'd have any of this, I thought I'd be dead before I even turned twenty, but it's all changed for the better and apart of me thinks it's all still a dream. I just can't believe it all sometimes."
He pressed his lips to hers while the music sang to them both. Neither of them had ever been happier than they were at that moment. They were just two newly weds extremely in love and expecting a baby together. They were ready to start their lives together, they were excited for it.
He snapped out of the memory when he arrived at the bar where he was meeting Pheonix. For a moment, he didn't want to meet Pheonix anymore. Pheonix didn't matter to him anymore. He didn't want to be with her, he wanted Acid and Acid alone.
He shook his head, pushing his feelings aside to get out of the car and meet up with Pheonix.
She was waiting for him with a drink in her had. As usual, her clothing was minimal and didn't leave much to the imagination for anyone.
"Hey, Gorgeous." She roughly pulled him towards her to harshly press her lips to his. The kiss was violent and Poison couldn't help but compare the kiss to Acid's kisses. Pheonix's were rough and demanding, but Acid's varied from soft and sweet to passionate and daring.
"You wanna drink or are we skipping the shit tonight?"
He knew if he stayed and had a drink, he'd have time to talk himself out of sleeping with her. "Skip the shit, let's get out of here."
She smiled wickedly. "Whatever you want, sweetie."
She took him by the hand and took him to the nearest private place she could find.
She violently started ripping off his shirt while Poison unzipped her revealing dress in an instant. She wasn't wearing a bra, but there was a light pink thong barely covering her body.
She removed the remainder of his clothes until he was just in boxers. He lay her down and started creating love bites on her neck, but in his mind, it wasn't her neck he was kissing. It was Lexia's neck.
He failed to push her out of his mind, but it didn't stop him from continuing with Pheonix.
She started biting his ear lobe, it was almost painful, but not quite enough for him to let out a moan. It was when she dug her razor sharp nails in his back that he let out a moan.
"Fuck, Acid." He moaned without realizing he said his ex wife's name.
Pheonix paused, stopping what she was doing. "Wait. D-did you just call me Acid?!"
"Fuck I-I didn't even realize. I'm sorry."
"You said her name when you're about to fuck me? You're such a fucking pig! How could you even think of her? How the fuck could you? I want you to get out, we're not doing this anymore." She stood up and started putting her dress back on.
"No, this is not up for discusion. Get your fuckin' clothes back on, then leave."
Acid did just as she promised. She distracted her daugher while Poison left, but Bandit didn't really seem to mind. She knew her father had snuck out, but she was just glad to be spending time with her mother.
Bandit didn't really have a lot of energy, so they just pulled out an old, worn out board came with some of the pieces missing for a few hours.
"Mommy, can I ask you something?" Bandit's sleepy voice said as they played the game.
"Has daddy gone out to see Pheonix again?"
She paused. She didn't want to upset her daughter by telling her that her father was seeing her again. Acid knew how much she disliked Pheonix, she didn't want to upset her by saying that he was.
"It's okay if he is," She sighed. "I used to it now."
"He said he'd try to come back before you went to sleep."
"Can I say somethin' else?"
"Why aren't you an' daddy together anymore? Aunt Static and uncle Kobra are married, just like you and daddy were. They have babies and I used to be a baby, but they're still together, so why aren't you and daddy?"
The question almost killed her a little bit. "Well . . . it's very complicated, baby. Your daddy and I were together for a very long time. I loved him very much and he loved me very much too, but . . . honey, you remember when I had to leave when you were a just a little baby?" She nodded. "Well, as you know, I was gone for a very long time and while I was gone . . . your daddy and I, we changed a lot and he'd met other people since then who he wanted to be with."
"It wasn't my fault, was it?"
"God no. Baby, why would you even ask that?"
"Because the last time you an' daddy were together I was a baby then you had to leave. Did I do something bad when I was a baby? That why you had to go?"
"Baby, you didn't do anything wrong or anything bad. It was my fault, not yours."
She nodded. "Okay. Do you think you an' daddy'll ever become boyfriend and girlfriend again?"
"Um . . . I don't know, B."
"That's okay, mama. I like you an' uncle Curse anyways." She liked her and Curse anyway? Acid wondered if even her five-year-old daughter knew that her and Curse liked eachother that way.
She almost asked her daughter if she thought they were together, but Poison came waltzing in through the door.
"Daddy!" She smiled as he picked her up off the couch.
"Hey, Bandy." He kissed her forehead.
She hugged him. "I miss you!"
"Missed you too, baby. Have you and mommy been having a good time?"
"Yeah, we've been playing games. I too tired to run around an' stuff like that."
"You still sleepy now, baby?"
She nodded. "Real sleepy."
"You wanna get your pjs on then I'll tuck you in?"
She nodded. "Yeah. G'night, mama. I love you." She hugged her mother and Acid didn't hesitate to wrap her arms around her tiny daughter.
"G'night. I love you too, baby."
Bandit happily skipped into her room and started putting on her pjs, just as her father had told her to do.
Acid started packing away the game after her daughter pranced away. Poison helped her pick up the pieces from the game.
"So, you two have a good time?" Poison wondered.
"Yeah, we did. She wasn't really in the mood to run around or anything."
"It's the first time she's been that energetic after they've had to leave. The first time they had to leave was when she was two. She cried for three hours straight after they left, it was fucking heartbreaking."
"Shit, three hours?"
"Yup. Three hours full of crying. She didn't want anyone other than Curse or Silk. As you know, she's close to Curse but she adored Silk aswell."
"Oh, so you've all met Silk?"
"Yeah, Silk's great. It was pretty funny seeing Storm and Silk together. They're the complete fucking opposite, but they obviously care about eachother."
"I don't think Storm likes me all that much."
"Why do you think that?"
"She's never said a single word to me and I've gotten some pretty dirty looks from her before."
"If it's any consolation, she used to fucking hate me back when we first met."
"Why would she've hated you?"
"Well, she thought I liked booze more than Bandit at the time. After you died, Kobra, Static and Death kind of acted as Bandit's parents. They didn't think I was in a good enough condition to be a good dad on my own and I didn't either, so they tended to look after her more than I did. Storm thought it was pretty discusting since I could've just but the bottle down and be with my daughter, but I didn't. She went through a similar thing. Her mom walked out on Storm and her dad when she was three. Her dad started drinking, became an alcoholic and neglected her. She ranaway when she was eleven and not long after that, the bombs happened. She's not seen her mom or dad since."
"Shit, I had no idea."
"Neither did I. She lost it with me one night and told me to grow some balls and be a father to my daughter."
"Is that when you started to be more of a dad to her?"
"Partly, but something happened that pushed me to be a real dad to her."
"Can I ask what that was?"
He paused. The time he really realized what he was doing to himself when he was heavily drinking was when he thought Death was Acid and tried to kiss her. He didn't know how Acid'd react to that.
"If you don't wanna talk about it, it's okay. Trust me, I know some things are hard to talk about."
He let out a small chuckle. "Yeah, they are."
There was a slight paused, but their eyes locked together for a breif moment.
"So, how was your time with Pheonix or don't I wanna know?"
He smiled. "We didn't do anything like that tonight."
"I thought that was the whole reason you meet up with her in the first place."
"It is, but we had a small fight then I left."
She laughed a little. "How can you even fight when it's just sex between you two?"
"Believe me, you can still fight."
"What was it even about?"
"Nothing important. It'll probably blow over then she'll get in touch apologizing 'cause she'll wanna meet up again."
She nodded, still wondering what the fight was about anyway.
Poison sat on the worn out couch while Acid put the game away. She was only wearing a tank top and shorts, her legs were fully exposed and he couldn't help but look at them. She was absolutely stunning to him from head to toe.
"By the way, any news on Andy?" He wondered.
She sighed. "Not really. My stupid parents don't let me talk to him when I'm in the Zones. They think it's impracticle, their words not mine. They said he's okay though, so I guess that's something."
"What are you gonna do with him?"
"I'm not gonna let him just become one of them, he deserves so much better than that. If I just kidnap him straight away, it's gonna look suspicious to them since I've just come back and we don't want that happening. I've got two and a half months to figure something out before they put him on the pills."
"I'm sure we'll figure something out. We always do."
"Yeah, I guess we do."
She sat next to him, flicking through a crappy gossip magazine from Battery City. The main story was on David Lufrini's wife, Audrey Lufrini, since it was rumoured she was pregnant again.
She sighed. There was never anything interesting in them. "Nope. It's just about an exterminator's wife who's knocked up again, so not that interesting."
He watched her flick through the pages, remembering what she'd said earlier. Was she really still in love with him? Was that why she couldn't move on with Curse? More importantly, did he love her back? He did say her name when he was with Pheonix, that had to have meant something.
"Poison, why are you staring at me?"
He shook his head. "No reason." He lied.
"Poison, we were together for years, I can tell when you're lying to me."
"It's just . . . I remembered what you said earlier . . . about you thinking you're still in love with me."
She put the magazine down. "I really don't wanna talk about that."
"I don't wanna talk about it, okay?"
"I just wanna ask one question, Ace. That's all."
She sighed. "Fine."
"Ace . . . you're one hundred percent sure your still in love with me? There's no doubt or anything?"
"I-I don't know. I mean, sometimes I think there's still some love there and then other times I don't and then sometimes, when you're being an asshole, I wonder why we were even together in the first place. So basically, I have no idea how I feel about you. I'm so fucking mixed up about it, it's unreal."
He nodded. "Yeah . . . I kind of feel the same way about you."
"Except for the love part." She said.
He almost said no, that he did still feel some love for her. He thought the feelings were dead, but he just wasn't sure if they were anymore. He wasn't sure about any of his feelings when it came to her.
He wondered how he felt about her at that moment in time and he couldn't say he hated her or even disliked her in the slightest. He wanted to be with her, but there were so many complications that came with a relationship that he didn't want.
Poison thought that maybe he was just attracted to Acid sexually, but he was also attracted to Pheonix sexually yet when he kissed Pheonix, it felt completely different to when he kissed Acid. With Pheonix, there was nothing but passion, lust and sex, but there was so much more with Acid. While there was passion and lust, there was also romance, there was a history between them. While he didn't want to admit it to himself, there was love.
"Poison, you're staring again."
"Shit, sorry. I just . . ."
"You just what?"
"I-I wanna try something."
"And what's that?"
He pressed his lips to hers, not giving her a chance to pull away before she realized what he was going to do.
He searched for feelings in the kiss, he found passion and lust, but as he expected there were more feelings. There were more feelings than there ever had been with anyone else before when he kissed her. He wanted more, he needed more.
Acid was shocked to say the least. She didn't know what to do, so she just sat there. His lips were soft against hers, they were eager for more and she wanted to give him more, but she couldn't. She just thought of Curse and how she'd promised him she'd think about their relationship.
She pushed him away. "Stop." She said.
He instantly felt stupid for kissing her out of the blue like that.
"Poison, we can't keep doing this. We agreed we'd stop this shit. You can't do that whenever you fucking feel like it, not anymore."
"We're not even together anymore, we've made that perfectly clear, so why do you keep doing this? Why do you keep kissing me? While the very first kiss started because of me, you seem to be the cause of them all."
He temporarily closed his eyes and prepared himself to blurt out the words he didn't know if she should say or not.
"Because I want more."
She gave him a confused look.
"Don't look at me that way when you know exactly what I'm talking about."
"I don't know what the fuck you're talking about, Poison. I'd like to know, but I actually have no motherfucking clue."
"When we kiss . . . there's this," he tried to find the right word. "spark. There's a spark that I can't describe. There's passion, history, hunger, lust . . . so many fuckin' emotions in one little spark and it's there every time we fuckin' kiss. I want more of that spark because it makes me feel fucking amazing. Then when we stop, I feel like an idiot for wanting it in the first place and it all drives me insane. Look me in the eye and tell me you don't feel that spark. I dare you to tell me you don't."
His forehead was pressed to hers.
"Tell me you don't want more aswell."
He leaned forward slightly, their lips inches apart when they heard the pitter patter of tiny feet run into the room.
Bandit was confused about the scene infront of her, but she didn't make a huge deal out of it. Afterall, she only wanted a bedtime story from her father before she went back to sleep again.
"Daddy, can I have a bedtime story?"
Poison pulled away and looked at his daughter. "Um, yeah sure, Bandy."
She smiled. "G'night, mama."
"G'night, baby. I love you."
"Love you, mama." She hugged her mother one last time before sleeping.
Before Poison closed the door completely, he looked at Acid, who was staring back at him.
He closed the door, sighing.
"Daddy, can you read this one?" She held up her Cinderella book.
He put on a fake smile for his daughter. "Sure."
She climbed onto his head with him as he opened the book. He kissed her forehead and read to her until she was safe in her own little dream world while he was stuck in reality with his fucked up feelings. He let his beautifully peaceful daughter sleep.