"Gerard…Way, was it? He had always intrigued me." Frank is introduced.
I flick the ash off the end of my cigarette, the light breeze picking up the dust and scattering it, the small grey particles floating gracefully to the ground. I stand outside by the trash bins in the grubby alley next to the club. I was hiding from passerby; I really wasn’t in the mood to be chatted to. I had come out here to try to have a little fun, but the stuffy club was not what I had hoped for. It was full of sluts, mostly female, who’d sleep with a guy for a cheap fee. The music was decent at times, but most of the songs were crap. My biggest mistake was coming with friends. After a couple drinks I was ready to leave, not finding my evening at all enjoyable. However, my buddies Ray and Bob were having a great time, and seeing as they were my ride I was forced to wait. As I was broke and couldn’t call a cab, I was stuck here. I had managed to force my way to the door though, needing to refresh myself in the cool night air. Of course the moment I walked out a couple druggies spotted me, and one of them was checking me out. I wrinkled my nose in disgust, hurrying around to the alley I was in now. It was deserted, a quiet place where I could smoke in peace.
My cigarette was now a stump, and I sighed as I threw the butt to the ground, grinding it into the pavement with my shoe. I leaned back against the wall, closing my eyes briefly. I refused to go back into the club; I couldn’t stand it in there. Now that I had smelled the night air again I realized just how much it had reeked of booze and sweat. It made me sick, and I just wished I were home. I should have denied their invitation to come here, but they convinced me it would be a decent place and maybe I could get a social life for once. Yeah right. The punk outcast is going to have a social life. Sure. I think they were hoping I’d find a girlfriend, or maybe a boyfriend. I was bisexual, and they both knew it. The way they spun it made it seem like finding someone to date at a club would be a cinch. Of course they were wrong, as usual. Why did I even bother trying? I knew nobody wanted me for anything more than my body, and I had pretty high standards, which really didn’t help.
I had always hoped I’d get lucky and find my soul mate in school and never have to search again. But as a college dropout in a failing band, that wasn’t working out for me so well. I guess… There was that one kid.
Gerard…Way, was it? He had always intrigued me.
He liked the same music as I did, and always had a fascination with art, comics especially. When I first saw him my heart had nearly stopped. He was breathtakingly beautiful, and his eyes had this sparkle that had made my heart flutter. I had never worked up the courage to talk to him though. He had been an amazing person, and he’s the only one I’m sure I ever fell in love with. Sure, there was a history of failed relationships behind me. I just wasn’t a people person, and I know I never really loved any of them. They were infatuations, lasting no more than 4 months each. Gerard was the only one who had held my heart for longer than that. I had always told myself it would go away, that I would forget about him and he’d be another high school memory faded into oblivion. Of course he would. But he didn’t. He never has, and after high school I never saw him again. I had always cursed myself for being so stupid as to never have talked to him, knowing that if I had maybe I would be friends, or possibly more than friends, with him right now. I had tried to track him down once, figure out where he had gotten in life. But nothing came up. I searched for a while, but it was all in vain. There was no trace of him anywhere. Stupid Internet. The one time it actually counts you don’t have what I need. Just like everything else in my life.
I felt my phone vibrate against my leg, the soft buzzing muffled by the denim of my pocket. I sighed inwardly and pulled it out, seeing I had a text.
‘ready 2 go, where r u?’
I blew a stream of air through my nose as I replied ‘I’m outside, in the alley on the side. And please, learn some English before I throw a dictionary at your face.’
A couple seconds later my phone buzzed again, the screen lighting up to show Bob’s newest text.
‘haha ur funny come to the frnt k we’re waiting’
I rolled my eyes, pushing myself off the wall. I walked to the front, finding Bob and Ray waiting for me.
“So we’re good to go then?” I asked, raising an eyebrow.
“Yeah, the club wasn’t what I remembered… But we’re ready now.” Ray replied, scratching his head a little through his fluffy afro.
I wonder why. I thought silently, rolling my eyes inwardly. Ray was probably too drunk at the time to remember anything, his brain deciding for him that the club was good. I started briskly towards the car, my friends stumbling along behind me.
“I’m driving.” I announced, stealing the keys from Bob’s hand and running up to the car, unlocking it and getting in the driver’s side.
“’Kay” Bob slurred, collapsing into the back while Ray managed with the little coordination he still had to climb into the passenger seat.
I waited until they both had their seat belts on and doors closed before pulling out, driving carefully as the only sober one left in the car. We arrived at Ray’s shortly and I waved good night as fumbled with his house key, finally managing to open the door and wave an almost sheepish goodbye, his goofy grin plastered on his face. I then drove over to Bob’s helping him out and inside, throwing him onto his bed as gently as I could. I left his house key beside him on his nightstand; he was already passed out with his arms thrown half off the bed. I exited the house quietly, though I doubt a nuclear explosion would’ve woken him by now. I climbed back into the car, I’d return it tomorrow or the next day. I drove home to my lonely apartment, going up the stairs and unlocking the door, throwing the little bit of stuff I had brought on the couch and slumping into a chair.
I let out a deflated sigh, I was sighing a lot tonight. I guess it happened when you had shit nights. After a while of moping I rolled myself off the couch, standing to brush my teeth and get my pajamas on. I ran a hand through my hair as I sat on the edge of my bed, dreading the band rehearsal tomorrow. The band had been falling apart, being torn up by everything. As it was I had nothing to fall back on, and with every practice my future looked more and more bleak. Joy. I sighed again- what is wrong with me? I never sigh this much- and lay back on the pillows. At least the sleep would be a peaceful release, and I could forget my troubles for a few blissful hours. I closed my eyes and exhaustion took over, quickly transporting me into a deep sleep.
A/N: Okay? I hope so. As always, R&R pretty please! Love you guys xoxo