"I'm Sorry" whoo it's about time I finally put this up. Enjoy!!
"BEEP!BEEP!" Ryan's horn made Brendon jump nearly out of his skin. He grabbed his wallet and rad out the door.
"Hi Ryan, thanks for picking me up!" Brendon smiled. Ryan looked adorable. The older boy wore blue skinny jeans, a Smashing Pumpkins tee, a black beanie cap and he was wearing black makeup around his eyes. He was drop dead gorgeous!
"No prob, glad you're comming with!" He smiled his heart-melting-knee-killing-face-reddening smile of his. Brendon felt himself giggle and utter something not understandable. "Bren? You mind if I put on some music?"
"Yes. Wait, no. I mean yes I'd love some music!" he did a metal facepalm after he'd made an idiot out of himself. Ryan just laughed and turned the tape player on.
"The Beatles? Awesome! I didn't know anyone else liked them but me!" Brendon smiled.
"Yeah man the Beatles are the best! When I was 5 I wanted to be John Lennon!" he laughed.
"No way, you're kidding right?"
"Nope. I was him for halloween and I wore the glasses for it every day." they laughed together and sang songs all the ride to the venue.
"I wanna dedicate this last song to my friend brendon and anyone else who wants someone they can't get. Bren this ones for you!" Ryan yelled into the mic. He plucked the beginning chords of Hey Jude. Brendon smiled. He loved this song. Ryan was a great musician, his voice was so perfect it made Brendon want to scream and cry at the same time.
After the show Ryan brought him backstage. He was all sweaty. Brendon couldn't help himself as he thought of dirty little things.
"Man you were amazing, you sounded great!" Brendon exclaimed.
"Oh thanks man. I hoped you liked the song we played for you." he smiled.
"I loved it. Hey Jude is my favorite. It was really awesome of you. You didn't have to do that, you know." he felt his cheeks turning pink.
"I wanted to, I felt kinda bad because you said the person you liked didn't like you back."
"Thanks. I really enjoyed it, it was sweet of you." He stopped thinking for a moment so much about keeping the fact he liked Ryan away from him, and decided he needed to follow Patrick's advice. "Hey, um, Ryan? Have you ever thought about being with a boy?"
Ryan stared at him for a moment with a blank expression on his face before having a look of confusion. "What? No, I haven't why? That's kinda random Bren."
"I-I-I'm asking.. Because Ryan," he wanted one of those worm hole things Mr. Toro always talked about to swallow him up. He felt like he would pass out. Then he realized Ryan was saying something.
"What? Man are you okay? You look kindof pale. What are you saying? Bren!? You okay? Hello?" he stuck his hand to Brendon's forehead to check his temperature. "You're paler than Gerard, Brendon. You okay? Can you hear me?"
"I-I'm fine Ryan." lie. "I'm asking because I know a guy who likes you and I felt bad when you said you didn't like boys." A bigger lie. Good going mouth you have officially screwed us over. Hope you fall off. Love always, Brain
"Oh, um... Sorry? Who is it?" Ryan looked so confused. Poor clueless, adorable, boy.
"He didn't want me to tell anyone. I just figured I would give it a chance." stupid. Stupid. Stupid. You're so stupid.
"Oh okay that's fine. Wanna get a drink?" Ryan pointed to the bar.
"Sure." a drink would take his mind off the situation at hand, well at mind He guessed.
Ryan bought him a beer and they sat at the stools and talked. Brendon learned about Ryan's life. His mom died when he was little but it didn't upset him much because he didn't really know her. His dad was a drug addict and he didn't pay much attention to Ryan. He was always locked in his bedroom smoking or at work. Ryan learned to get used to it. Everybing was fine as long as he paid the bills as far as he was concerned. Brendon told him about how his parents were divorced and how his dad kicked him out when he learned Brendon was gay so he lived with his mom and grandmother.
Ryan had two or three drinks, and seemed to be getting a bit tipsy. He was tripping over words and telling stories and not seeming to realize he wasn't keeping his head. Brendon had one beer. He figured he'd has just water after that because he figured he might have to drive them home.
"And then the-the guy was like, "whurs my wifi sandwich brotha-" Ryan babbled.
"Ryan, you okay there buddy?" Brendon stopped him.
Ryan smiled, "Hell yeah!" Ryan was obviously drunk. Brendon didn't know how drunk but he was drunk enough. Do something stupid! Make your move!
"Ryan? Do I look, attractive?"
"Mmmmmmhmmmmmmm." he replied slowly. Brendon leaned inward toward Ryan.
"How attractive?" he said in a low tone like it was a kindergarden secret that he could only tell to one person.
"Very?" Ryan tried.
Slowly, Brendon cupped his hand around Ryan's and pulled him closer, and pressing their lips together softy. They kissed for a minute before Ryan broke away from it.
"What are you doing?" Ryan had seemed to grasped the fact it was a boy kissing him.
"I-I thought.. I thought you liked me?" Brendon sighed, He was horribly upset.
"I don't like-Wait What?!"
"I thought you liked me. I'm sorry. I really really like you Ryan!"
"So you kiss me? Brendon, I don't like boys like that, I'm sorry i can't." he got up and began walking towards the stage.
"Please Ryan! Just give it a chance? Can't you try? Please I love you!" he ran after him.
"I-I I don't think I can Brendon. I've never liked boys. I'm sorry, can we just, can we go home? I'm going to grab my guitar." he turned away going to get his case.
"Well I'm driving, there is no way in hell I'm letting you drive drunk!" he stood behind Ryan and took his keys from his pocket.
"Hey! What are you doing?!"
"Meeting you in the car. No accidents tonight." he walked back to the car, leaving Ryan in the building to pack his things.
"Ryan?" Brendon asked as he slid into the Jeep, putting his guitar in back.
"I'm really, really sorry." Brendon sighed. "I really shouldn't have done that I'm so sorry."
"It's-it's fine. Just please don't do it again alright? I'm just not into boys okay?" Ryan ran a hand through his hair, looking tired.
"Alright." Brendon nodded and turned on the engine.
"This is it, third one on the left." Ryan said, giving directions to his house to Brendon. He pulled into the driveway and got out after Ryan.
Ryan stopped, "How are you getting home?" he asked.
"Eh... I'll just walk." Brendon shrugged.
"The hell!? It's almost 2-fucking-30! You're walking? You could get kidnapped-or even fucking RAPED you know!" Ryan exclaimed.
"And your point is...?" Brendon raised an eyebrow and put a hand on his hip. Not that Ryan could see his face anyway, it was much too dark.
"Just, um.. Stay the night here. You can just sleep here tonight. You're not getting killed because I was the idiot who got drunk and couldn't drive."
"What!? No. I'll walk, g'night." he turned and started down the driveway. Ryan ran behind him and grabbed his arm. For a skinny boy he was strong.
"This is for your own good Bren." he dragged the unwilling boy up his driveway. Brendon eventually gave in and followed him, upstairs into his room.
"Here." Ryan threw a shirt at Brendon. "You can wear this. Button-downs, suspenders, and a bowtie are nice but probably not comfy to sleep in."
"Thanks." Brendon changed into the clothes Ryan gave him. Meanwhile, Ryan pulled a bed cot from under his bed for Brendon to sleep on. the benefits of am ancient bed he thought. It had a pillow and a throw blanket. Good thing it wasn't winter. Brendon thanked Ryan and apologized again.
"I'm sorry." he sighed laying on the bed. Ryan shut off he light.
"Don't be. I'm sorry you fell for the wrong guy. I really am. I wish I could do something. I'm sorry." Ryan curled up on top of his bed. "Good night Bren."