Categories > Original > Drama
A fucking rant
5 reviewsI don't give 2 fucks anymore. You try being in my position and keep it to yourself for months on end
0Unrated
I am breaking the fuck down
Having yet another anxiety attack (they keep getting worse, but hell, my parents don't notice or care)
I've tried talking to my mom about the social anxiety/general anxiety. But all she fucking told me was "stop pitying yourself, there's nothing wrong with you"
LIKE FUCK!
I am suicidal as fuck
I am at the point of starting to self harm again (after a couple months clean)
I am having worsening nightmares and sleep paralysis
I am fucked up. But she won't admit it, or accept it
Their fucking pushing me to this
How? They want too much from me, they expect 80-90s in every class, my room to be perfect, that I should drop everything to help them.
It's too fucking much!
They push this so hard, I don't have the chance at having a social life (I could if they would let me actually go out with my friends, let me go and have fun)
But they don't. They act like my friends are the worst people ever. Their not though.
Like on friday night, I hung out with my friends, which was the best time I ever had.
But no
I can't have that all the time, I can't go to friends houses that often, have friends over here.
It's a once in a while thing, rather than every other weekend or so.
To top all that off, my mom is going on a "ohmygod, he's such an asshole! He always makes me do shit!"
Pretty much trying to make my brother and I choose sides.
Either her or my dad.
Like fuck, she won't stop whining about it!
I try to get her to calm down, she screams at me about how shes an "adult" and can do whatever the fuck she wants.
When she tries the whole choosing sides thing, I say I don't want to get involved in their drama (and try to keep my brother out of it too).
Then she makes some bitchy remark about how I'm the little bitch who favorites one parent over the other.
I am flipping out, mainly because it feels like my family is falling apart, and I'm the fucking cause(or how my mom makes me feel)
I am getting to the point where I can't take it anymore.
Hell, the notebook I keep for ranting (like in a perks of being a wallflower type of way) will probably turn into a suicide note or something.
I don't fucking know
I don't have a fucking clue why I'm posting it here though. Majority of the people I loved talking to left, and it's falling apart.
Hate me, don't hate me, judge me, don't judge me. I don't care.
This website is shit
Full of hypocrites
Bitches
Asshats
Liars
Attention Whores
And plain out narcassists
I'm pretty much all of the fucking above.
Now, to try and calm down enough to go back outside and help my mom and brother set up a fucking pool (which I don't even want).
Fuck.
Why can't life be like a nice fanfic?
Something you imagine?
A reality you create in your head?
Easy?
Having yet another anxiety attack (they keep getting worse, but hell, my parents don't notice or care)
I've tried talking to my mom about the social anxiety/general anxiety. But all she fucking told me was "stop pitying yourself, there's nothing wrong with you"
LIKE FUCK!
I am suicidal as fuck
I am at the point of starting to self harm again (after a couple months clean)
I am having worsening nightmares and sleep paralysis
I am fucked up. But she won't admit it, or accept it
Their fucking pushing me to this
How? They want too much from me, they expect 80-90s in every class, my room to be perfect, that I should drop everything to help them.
It's too fucking much!
They push this so hard, I don't have the chance at having a social life (I could if they would let me actually go out with my friends, let me go and have fun)
But they don't. They act like my friends are the worst people ever. Their not though.
Like on friday night, I hung out with my friends, which was the best time I ever had.
But no
I can't have that all the time, I can't go to friends houses that often, have friends over here.
It's a once in a while thing, rather than every other weekend or so.
To top all that off, my mom is going on a "ohmygod, he's such an asshole! He always makes me do shit!"
Pretty much trying to make my brother and I choose sides.
Either her or my dad.
Like fuck, she won't stop whining about it!
I try to get her to calm down, she screams at me about how shes an "adult" and can do whatever the fuck she wants.
When she tries the whole choosing sides thing, I say I don't want to get involved in their drama (and try to keep my brother out of it too).
Then she makes some bitchy remark about how I'm the little bitch who favorites one parent over the other.
I am flipping out, mainly because it feels like my family is falling apart, and I'm the fucking cause(or how my mom makes me feel)
I am getting to the point where I can't take it anymore.
Hell, the notebook I keep for ranting (like in a perks of being a wallflower type of way) will probably turn into a suicide note or something.
I don't fucking know
I don't have a fucking clue why I'm posting it here though. Majority of the people I loved talking to left, and it's falling apart.
Hate me, don't hate me, judge me, don't judge me. I don't care.
This website is shit
Full of hypocrites
Bitches
Asshats
Liars
Attention Whores
And plain out narcassists
I'm pretty much all of the fucking above.
Now, to try and calm down enough to go back outside and help my mom and brother set up a fucking pool (which I don't even want).
Fuck.
Why can't life be like a nice fanfic?
Something you imagine?
A reality you create in your head?
Easy?
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