Frank talks to the sister and uncovers a forgotten piece of his past...
I'm not sure if any of you read the reviews of the last chapter but I think I should explain why I took so long to update. For many years I have suffered with self harm and for seven months I stopped, until I relapsed and had to be kept in hospital for a few days observation. I'm okay and I hope you all can forgive me.
Anyway the song for this chapter is Heaven isn't too far away by Warrant and I hope you enjoy this chapter!
"How...how did you know who I was? I mean I don't remember you..."
"Well I wouldn't expect you too Frank, you were just a baby..."
The men followed the Sister to her desk and sat in the seats in front of it, the warm glow from the window surrounding them like a safety blanket. The sister sat across from them and surveyed Frank closely, a soft smile on her lips.
"You were always such a sweet baby, you had the most beautiful eyes I had ever seen. I was put in charge of your care and every moment I spent with you, I fell in love. You were just four years old when I was sent away, I didn't agree with the way you were treat, you were just a child! Still a baby really and I wouldn't allow you to be treat in such a cruel way, I had to leave or risk being thrown from the convent, my vows, God, are all I have. All I've ever known, so I left and it broke my heart..."
Frank leaned forward and buried his head in his hands, rubbing the heel of his palms against his eyes. He looked up and glanced at Gerard before looking back to the nun. A million questions shot through his mind, Frank closed his eyes and took a deep breath leaning back and reaching for Gerard's hand. Once again he looked at the sister
"Did you even try to find out how I was? I was suffering every single day! Come with me..." Frank stood and walked toward the door "Come on! And bring your keys"
Frank guided them back through the hallways they'd came through until he reached a familiar door, swallowing the sick feeling in his stomach, and turning to the sister to take the keys she held in her hand. Immediately he recognised the key that sent terror through him as a child and he took a deep breath as he turned the key in the lock. A loud click echoed through the hall and slowly Frank turned the handle. As the door swung open with a loud creak, the scent of damp filled the air causing the younger man's stomach to lurch as he felt a million memories wash over him. Non of them good.
"This is where I was kept, like a dirty little secret to be hidden away. Have you been up here?" The sister looked at the scratch marks and dents in the heavy wooden door, and the marks on the pale dull paint of the staircase. She looked back to Frank and shook her head, she was told that Frank was being taken care of, he had made friends and was doing well. Never had she thought that this could be the horrifying truth, that he was locked away and abused. She was shocked, angered and guilty."Come on then, I'll give you the guided tour." Gerard and the sister stayed silent as they followed a determined Frank up the stairs.
Closing his eyes as he reached the top, Frank put out his hand and swung open the door at the top with a loud creak. The smell of musky air from years of abandonment filled his nostrils, causing him to cough for a moment before he beckoned the others to enter behind him. Sister Margaritte was the first to react, covering her mouth as she gasped loudly at the condition of the room around her. A single mattress lay on the hard, rough floor, a thin pillow and blanket strewn upon it. A dull light came through a small window, dirty from decades of dust and filth, barely lighting the damp room and the nuns stomach lurched at the sight. She dropped to her knees suddenly and began to weep, realising the horrible life she could have prevented Frank from having. The young man didn't blame her, she couldn't help it, but the sister blamed herself and needed his forgiveness.
"Oh Frank...if I'd known, if I could have stopped this for you I would have. You must believe me..."
"I don't blame you, none of this was your fault...I shouldn't have brought you up here. I just needed you to understand, to know what I lived like...I'm sorry"
"No, don't you ever apologize! I don't want to hear that from you, what kind of God have I given my life to? When I joined the order I never imagined that something like this could be done by the lords servants...what have I put my faith in?"
"Please don't question your faith, I envy you. To have faith in someone watching you, protecting you, I wish I could have that assurance, that heaven is watching over me...." The sister looked at Frank and then to Gerard with a small smile on her face, she turned back to the younger and cupped his cheek softly
"You already do, he's right by your side. Sometimes heaven isn't too far away...I'm going to leave you two for a moment..." She brushed a thumb across his face just below his eye before moving to walk down the stairs.
The two men just stood gazing at each other, unsure of what to say. Gerard was the one to break the silence, moving closer to Frank.
"She's right you know, heaven isn't really far to me, I feel closer to it every day I'm with you..." Frank gently brushed his lips against Gerard, something catching his eye as he pulled back. He moved to the corner of the room and kneeled to pull up a floorboard. Underneath tucked snugly in the gap was a book, smiling he pulled it out and tucked it inside his jacket
"Come on..."He stood and walked to Gerard and put out his hand, taking one last look around the room and silently saying goodbye to the terrified and lonely little boy he once was "Let's get out of here..."
Dani's eyes fluttered open to see a sleeping Mikey had his arms wrapped tightly around her. She smiled as she tried to remember the last time she felt so safe, a mumbled good morning pulled her from her thoughts. Mikey looked down at her and smiled, he wasn't sure exactly when he had fallen for the girl but he knew the first moment he saw her he thought she was the most beautiful thing he had ever seen. In a world of ugliness and demons she was his angel, he never wanted her to leave his side.
A light knock on Mikeys door forced them to jump apart, guiltily glancing at each other as the door opened "Hey guys, Frank and I bought breakfast. Come on downstairs..." Gerard flashed them a knowing grin before shutting the door. Mikey pulled Dani toward him, picking her up and wrapping her legs around his waist and kissed her softly.
"Come on baby, I'm starving..." He kissed her again before putting her down and turning toward the door. Dani playfully jumped on his back, planting a kiss behind his ear and giggling quietly
"Carry me Mikey...or you don't get to eat.." The two of them laughed quietly as they made their downstairs. After catching Gerard's knowing glance, they didn't need to hide their feelings anymore. They were teenagers in love and didn't care.
After breakfast Frank disappeared into Gerard's room, the older man decided to leave him alone for a while. He figured Frank probably needed some time alone so he began to clean up and waste some time, after doing the dishes and vaccuming the floors he crashed in front of the tv.
As Gerard flicked through the channels of mind numbing daytime shows and depressing news for over an hour he realised something, he was missing the world. Mostly he was glad but a part of him was yearning to explore, to travel and make a life for himself and the guys. Frank came first though, he would help him if it was the last thing he did.
Gerard flicked off the tv and made his way upstairs, his mind filled with the younger man. He wondered what he was doing so curiously he walked into the bedroom.
Frank was snoring lightly on the bed, a small black book beside him. Gerard quietly walked over and picked up the book, smiling as he read the scribbled writing on the first page
I met a boy today my new friend. His name is Gerard but you already know that because he gave me you. He was very nice and very funny and drawed a lot too but I can't tell anyone because I am not aloud friends. The sisters said so its our secret.
My new friend
Gerard smiled a little sadly at the entry and turned the page, curious to read more. It was like learning a piece of hidden history, he wanted to know more. A tear rolled down his cheek as he read the final entry of the little book, the day Frank was taken away.
Sister Mary saw me with Gerard and took me away. She locked me in here again and called me devil boy. I dont mean to be horrible. It's not my fault. I cant help it and I dont want to be evil anymore. I wish I could run away but they would just find me. Being on my own is scary. You and Gerard and Mikey are my only friends but they told me I cant see him anymore and I dont want them to take you away so Im going to hide you
Gerard ran his finger along the dried tear marks left by a lonely child over a decade ago before closing the book, turning to face his sleeping lover. As he gazed at him he remembered trying to draw Frank as a child, he thought he was beautiful back then too. Maybe this meeting as adults wasn't just by chance, maybe they were destined to be together, maybe it really was fate. Gerard almost didn't register the words that slipped from his mouth, he wasn't sure what made him say them to the sleeping Frank but it felt right
"I love you..."