Profile Of A Ficwaddian....LAME.
The epic tale of one Alexandra Day. Prepare to be horrified. *Angst for the irony bitches*
I have been putting off doing one of these for ages. But when you're sitting alone in your room on a Friday night and realize that they only thing you can actually see worthwhile doing is your Biology homework, you take a second to decide that spending all you time on a fanfiction website is sounding pretty good right now.
Real name: Ellen Grace (Ellie, Or Lennie as some of you might know me)
Nickname: Morbid, Slime Bucket Mc Death Muncher (Yeah I have lovely friends)
Username: Alexandra_Day. Which I use for fucking EVERYTHING. It's my pen name that I decided on when I was eleven. Alexandra (Alex for short because my little pre-adolescent brain wanted to have a "badass" name like Max from MAXIMUM RIDE) And Day because Lynda Day from Press Gang is my fucking idol. If anyone knows who she is you get a free puppy and a straight razor as a prize.
Age: Sixteen. And still a loser.
Gender: Everyone has these drawn out response being all "Well the severe lack of penis is frightening" and I am so down with that but because I am a fucking rebel I am going to be straight forward and say....... GENDERLESS EARTHWORM.... Female.
Country: Australia… yay…Australia is shit house .It's fucking hot all the time, even in winter it only gets down to about 8C on really 'cold' days. I also live in QLD so its soooo humid. It is full of bogans (which are like chavs but soooo much worse...) no one has cool accents, it takes forever to get Kerrang here and it is always like six months old. But this year so pretty groovy shit has/is happening over here in the sunburnt shit hole. Like I saw Blink 182 at the beginning of the year and saw All Time Low and are seeing them again in...calculating 19 days and I AM SEEING GRANT FUCKING MORRISON AND GERARD WAY IN 56 DAYS :D Life = Complete...
Haha I thought for a moment about putting a picture in, but I couldn't even bring myself to type in the heading... I am that fucking hideous.... Wow self-confidence, you are doing an amazing job today if I do say so myself.
Have been reading/writing fanfiction for: Six years motherfucker. Hmm no wonder I was a fucked up ten year old... disturbing.
Relationship status: A hopeless romantic who just happens to be blessed with a fucking disgusting human form. So, alone. Though I have recently had a bit of a run in with a stalker... God fucking DAMMIT LEAVE ME ALONE!
-My Chemical Romance
-All Time Low
-Fearless Vampire Killers
-Panic! At The Disco
-New Found Glory
-The Smashing Pumpkins
-Fall Out Boy
-This Good Robot
-The Sex Pistols
-Miles Davis (Because he is the fucking king of smooth jazz)
-The Wonder Years
-Brand New (cries They are beautiful, THANK YOU SYRA!)
-Amelie (Watching it right now for the thousandth time, because it is fucking amazing)
-The Princess Bride
-Hellboy one and two
-V for Vendetta
-Night of The Living Dead
-Dawn of The Dead
-The City of Lost Children
-Texas Chainsaw Massacre (My very dear good fiend, Silent and I think that Leatherface and Slenderman should hook-up... I'd ship that)
-Scott Pilgrim VS The World
-From Dusk ‘Til Dawn
-Attack the Block
-House Of A Thousand Corpses
-Love Actually... shut the hell up it is a beautiful story! cries
Favourite TV show:
-Sherlock (Oh my fucking god. Benedict Cumberbatch... you are delicious)
-Big Bang Theory
-Fringe (I SERIOUSLY FUCKING LOVE YOU PETER BISHOP)
-The Fault In Our Stars By John Green
-Looking For Alaska by John Green (I'm sorry he is just so fab)
-The Mortal Instruments series by Cassandra Clare
-Worldshaker by Richard Harland (Seriously this book is so steampunk and badass! Brilliant!)
-A Catcher In The Rye by J. D. Salinger (What can I say, you don’t fuck with the classics)
-Johnny The Homicidal Manic by Jhonen Vasquez
-Squee by Jhonen Vasquez (He is my favourite artist, he is so fucking brilliant)
-Hellboy by Mike Mignola
-V for Vendetta by Alan Moore (Can’t argue with the classics)
-Umbrella Academy by (Duh) Gerard Way (Pfft you guys didn’t really except me to not put this on here. Besides The Boy and Hazel and Cha Cha are so freaking great)… I AM A GEZELLE AND THE JUNGEL IS MY HOME!
-The Doll House by –TheGhostOfYou- (Seriously underappreciated and fucking brilliant)
-Be My Detonator by the fabulously well know Cosmic Zombie (This was the first story I read on Ficwad and basically what got me into Frerard, so thank you Lucy (: )
-First Of The Gang To Die by Unitedsuck007 (I feel like you can’t NOT love this fic! It is brilliant and totally got me obsessed with the mafia)
-Trying To Escape The Inevitable by Cosmic Zombie (UPDATE WOMAN!)
-Until My Heart Explodes
I feel like I am like betraying Ficwad or something, but here is a list of my favourite fics not on this site:
-Skin Of The Canvas (HOLY SHIT I CAN’T EXPLAIN HOW MUCH I FUCKING LOVE THIS STORY! JESUS)
-Thing-Thing (If anyone has read it, I am basically exactly like Gerard, attitude wise in this one… it’s actually a little sad)
-Gerard Way’s Vampire Detective Agency (FUCK YEAH MULTI BANDOM SHIT!)
-I Was Your Silver Lining (HOLY SHIT… enough said)
-Headlights Look Like Diamonds
-Conclusions (God dammit I loved that fic!)
-Buy Handmade (Okay so I might be a little bit obsessed with this author shifty eyes. BUT FOR THE RECORD ANY FANFICTION WHERE A CERTIAN CHARACTER COUGH GERARD COUGH FUCKING KNITS IS ONE WHERE HE COUGH GERARD COUGH IS NOT ALLOWED TO TOP...Okay done)
-Kiss With A Fist (HOLY SHIT IS IS LIKE FIGHT CLUB... BUT YOU KNOW YOU CAN TALK ABOUT IT... Ehem... Fight Club? What Fight Club... I know nothing of the sort)
-OKAY GUILTY PLEASURE MOMENT The Body Shoppe.... (This is a Kuroshitsuji fanfiction... shut the hell up it is the best anime ever.... and manga... and fuck this fic is perfect. SEBASTIAN FUCKS CIEL SO HARD HE ENDS UP IN A WHEELCHAIR FOR A WEEK!)
Okay I’ll stop rambling now…
I always thought putting down your favourite Ficwad personalities was a bit lame. It’s also like ‘haha you write great fics but you’re a bit of a bitch” so yeah not happening.
Pairings You Ship:
-Frerard OTP MOTHERFUCKERS
-Ger-z (IRL, Seriously they are fucking adorable and I fucking LOVE Lyn-z she is god)
-Thorki (oh god I am so ashamed of this....)
-Rydon (I’m not even a little bit ashamed)
-Cecil/Carlos (Welcome To Night Vale is slowly consuming my existance)
-Dean/Castiel (I’m pretty sure they’ve got a ship name but I am too lazy to find out)
Wow I spend waaaaay too much time reading fanfiction…
Random Shit About Me…Lame:
-The blue line that comes up under mistakes in word freaks me out and I don’t know why.
-I have literally three friends and one of them is my little brother… he is twelve… my life sigh
-I am musically retarded… Like seriously I cannot for the LIFE of me learn and instrument. My tiny hands don’t fit around a fret board, even on a half sized, and I can’t keep time well enough to play drums. I sing a little bit, but usually badly and loudly.
-I am a part time art student, while still attending school. Seriously though I fucking love it, my teachers are crazy and it is awesome and I don’t have to walk up stairs because there is a LIFT!
-I am a socialist :D Fuck capitalism.
-I am lying in bed right now attempting to gain the energy needed to go and get a bowl of cereal.
-Words That I Hate That Are Used In Fanfiction When Refering To Cum: A List Covers the eyes of small children.
Sploodge: This is just completely off putting. There is nothing funny about it.
Spunk:... really? Spunk rat.
Seed: Just weird. It's like he is starting a mini orchard inside someone.
Cream: Can i get jam with that?
manliness: Does he really need to his manhood by filling a body cavity with tiny sperm?
hot load: .... TO THE FACE! OUTTA FUCKING NO WHERE!
necture: This is just yuk. Like 'oh yeah baby your sweet necture tastes so good' that's disgusting.
Juices: Mmm orange and mango flavoured.
sigh And now that everyone is sufficently disgusted, I'll shut up. And I wonder why no one reads my shit?
I hate OC's. I mean I really HATE them. I have nothing against people who like them or write them, it is just totally not my jam.
Sample Of My Writing
Oh snap this hasn’t even been posted up yet, so this kind of acts as like a sneak preview and a sample. Frank’s POV.
When You Touch My Hand And Talk Sweet Talk.
I am nibbling on the end of my straw connecting my mouth to the deliciously pink drink clasped in my tiny hands, when he tumbles in. Throwing open the door with the cock of his hip, he addresses the whole Milkshake Bar.
“Do I look good today or what?” one spidery hand slips into his battered leather jacket, returning with a slim comb “You should have seen the line behind me on the way here” the comb easily glides through his midnight tresses swept up into a lazy quiff “Guess they were all lookin’ at the view” with a cheeky grin and the wink of an eye he slaps his arse.
The Milkshake Bar is in an uproar of gaudy laughter. Everyone loves him. Gerard Way is the epitome of sexy.
My lips twitch into a smirk, I hurry to hide it in my milkshake, but never let him leave my honey gaze. His hips sway; there is a definite sultry air about his stride; like he is daring you to look. Gerard’s black jeans so ludicrously tight that on anyone else they would have looked ridiculous.
He throws himself down in the corner booth, arm slung carelessly over the back of the seat. His entourage of Greasers and girls who dressed like the models from the pinup magazines I had found in my father’s bottom draw, crowed into the booth; cramming in far more people that the table was meant for, meaning half of girls ended up sitting on their man’s lap.
Their table is a complete ruckus of obnoxious laughter and cheers. The only silence when Gerard opens his mouth to speak. He has complete and utter control over them.
I sneak a tiny peak out from under my chestnut curls his emerald glare meeting mine; I feel a blush crawl up my neck, tickling my features. His eyes are warm and longing, he only hold my eyes for a moment before throwing me a promising wink and turning back to the made up blonde sprawled across Gerard’s lap.
I choke on my drink and shake my head attempting to jolt the red from my face.
Mini Rant: About how so many people read the utter shit that is my story With Dying Words waaaay more than the stuff I am actually proud of... Like Constants Of Curiosity. WHY!?!?!? IS IS BECAUSE WITH DYING WORDS IS ALL AGNSTY AND EMO AND LAME? AND PEOPLE LOVE THAT SHIT!?!? I AM TRYING TO BE HAPPY AND I STILL SUCK! FUUUUUUUCK....
deep breath Sorry about that.
Voilà that is me :D
Hope to catch you cool cats later. Feel free to hit me up anytime at firstname.lastname@example.org for a chat or whatever.