It's another day and Lazer Queen is again busying herself in the bases workshop. She knows it isn't long until she'll have to leave the base, but she's busying herself to distract her mind from tha...
BTW. I think you might realise I've accidently skipped a chapter in the last one so I'm adding the missed chapter on after I've posted this one. You don't have to read it though if you don't want to, I'm just a perfectionist lol.
Chapter 32. Number One
Another day in the zone 6 base and I was again hiding behind the garage doors. Messing around with scrap metal, hammering a few nails, drilling a few holes... the usual Killjoy tinkering stuff accomplished with rubbish tools and limited resources. I tend to do this a lot in my spare time, mill around aimlessly and do nothing of importance just to pass the time. Sitting around doing nothing is harder than it looks, you know?
I was working on an idea for a new fake explosive. Creating new designs, experimenting with different materials, testing different techniques. It's not like I hadn't done this many times before, it's not like my life's work will all be accomplished in a dirty, untidy workshop, but this is where I feel at home, where I feel comfortable. Back in zone 9 I'm constantly creating new designs because I don't like doing the same thing twice, I'm constantly in that workshop trying to pass the time that I have left.
I was still fiddling with materials, testing them with different tools, doing what I do best. But I was suddenly finding myself getting tired and fatigued from the tire of physical manual labour. After a few more minutes I finally decided to give my hands, body and mind a break from the strain and get myself a cool drink of water, something I had been depriving myself of for a good few hours now. So I reluctantly departed the garage to seek a refreshing glass of water, shutting the workshop doors slightly behind me as I advanced to my destination.
After a few twists and turns I finally entered the main room to which held a seating area, a kitchen and a dining area. Upon arriving I started walking over to the kitchen to complete the task at hand, it was only a brief errand though as I was ready to get back into action in the bases garage. So I grabbed a glass from one of the cupboards and poured myself a glass of water fresh from the tap. Well, it wasn't the cleanest of water nor was it cold and refreshing, but water is water at the end of the day and it keeps you hydrated non the less.
I was so busy in thinking about the pointless subject of the cleanliness of the water that I didn't notice the poison enter the room until he spoke.
"Hey Lazer. You finally emerged from your new home?" I looked at him with a smirk and nodded my reply.
"Yes I did, but don't worry. I'll climb back into my new home soon enough, just needed a drink was all." Party gave me a smile but not a normal one. This worried me slightly so I raised my voice ask.
"Are you ok Party?" He gave me a hesitant look before he said.
"Yea, I'm fine. Just thinking is all." I was curious as to what he was thinking about so asked.
"Ok, so what's got you troubled." He raised his eyes to meet mine before he raised his voice to speak.
"...Can I ask you a question Lazer?" I paused to take another sip of my drink before replying.
"'Of course you can. What's on your mind?" He then walked towards me, no longer holding a nervous yet hesitant look, but he was still struggling to get his words out.
"...Why aren't you the leader of the group in Zone 9?" I paused at the question.
The nature of the question took me by surprise to say the least and I didn't really know how to describe it at all. I stood there for about a minute thinking about it, thinking about how to answer this unusual question that I had in no way expected. But once I had gathered my thoughts I looked back up at Party and started to speak, trying to help him understand as best as I could.
"Party, I know I'm one of the longest running Killjoys and one of the most experienced, so I know where you're coming from and I understand it's kinda expected of me. But I've never really wanted, or have been up to the role of clan leader, it's just not in my nature. I am a member of a group, always have been always will be. I am in no way fit to be a leader." I paused for a second before I started to continue.
"Deep down Party I'm still that little girl in Clan Killjoy, still the little girl looking up at the adults and wish I was one of them. I am still that little girl standing at that shooting range wishing to be as good as the others. I was still innocent, I was still young... still free." Party Poison again hesitated before he again questioned.
"But, why have you never been a clan leader?" I shrugged my shoulders with sincerity before I answered.
"Because I've never wanted to be, never will be because that's not who I am." I paused again before I again continued. "One day there will be a war, a war so big even I won't be able to handle it. But I will stand on the front line and lead the fight if I have to. But me, a clan leader? That just isn't my role, never has been my role... I haven't got the persona of a clan leader, I'm not selfless enough to be that person." Party then spoke humorously at my words.
"And you think I have any of that?" I gave him a sincere smile before I answered him in a kind tone.
"Yes... Yes you do. You are an amazing man and you care for your group deeply and you would put their safety before your own. You are so brave that you're willing to hurt anyone to protect them. Whether they be a Drac or a Killjoy doesn't matter, you'll still do it." I paused, looking into the man's eyes before I continued.
"I couldn't do that, I'm not that selfless, caring or protective. If I was then maybe Blade would still be alive, maybe he wouldn't be dead, or at least didn't die alone. I'm not like you, I'll never be like you. I've only ever worried about number one." Party gave me a doubted look before he said.
"Somehow Lazer, I don't think that's true."
Well, there we go, the new chapter comes to a close and I'll be quick to add the missing one soon lol. Hope you enjoyed the chapter, and if you have any advice, ideas or views just shout.