Categories > Anime/Manga > Sailor Moon > Broken Gates or Because there isn't enough madness in Shoujo-Ai

Broken Gates or Because there isn't enough madness in Shoujo-Ai

by NeonProdigy 1 Reviews

This is what happens when you read too much humor and yuri fanfiction. In case you didn't notice, the story WILL include some shoujo-ai... among other things.

Category: Sailor Moon - Rating: PG-13 - Genres: Humor - Characters: Ami (Mercury), Chibi-Usa, Haruka (Uranus), Makoto (Jupiter), Michiru (Neptune), Minako (Venus), Pluto, Rei (Mars), Saturn, Usagi (Moon) - Published: 2006/08/24 - Updated: 2006/08/25 - 3755 words

Disclaimer: I do not own Sailor Moon. Naoko Takeuchi does. I don't own the Gates of Time. Setsuna does, I assume. I don't own bubblegum. I am too poor and broke to buy any. I don't own the answer to life, the universe and everything, and, if I owned Monty Python... THE WORLD WOULD BOW BEFORE ME!!! AH HA HA HA HA!!
This story is just something to occupy me until I can actually come up with a good idea for a real story... or finish one of my preexisting ones. It was just something spawned from the crushing vortex of my boredom, not to mention all the hours reading the works of such authors as Baka Gaijin 30, Shanejayell, Innortal, Black Dragon 6, Ozzallos, and Racewing. Sure, you can call it a spam-fic, but I could do a lot worse...
(NeonProdigy starts to laugh evilly as the lighting changes. The author is now doing a full-blown imitation of Dr. Tomoe. An admittedly POOR imitation)
... right, sorry. Start the story!
BSSMSSBSSMSSBSSMSSBSSMSSBSSMSSBSSMSSBSSMSSBSSMSSBSSMSSBSSMSSBSSMSSBSSM
Rated for language, shoujo ai, insanity, lack of plot, lack of most literary devices necessary for something to be classified as a story, and unneeded repetitive use of:
...towels...bubblegum...monkeys...kitchen sinks...squirrels...Monty Python references...the Spanish Inquisition...the Number 42...the End of the World...Time...Space...Repetition...more squirrels...cosplayers...martial artists...reborn warriors of a long forgotten empire...Goddesses...princes from other planets...giant robots...even more squirrels...Repetition...and sporks.
Note: The above may or may not be true.
BSSMSSBSSMSSBSSMSSBSSMSSBSSMSSBSSMSSBSSMSSBSSMSSBSSMSSBSSMSSBSSMSSBSSM
It started out as a fairly normal day at the Gates of Time... well, "normal" is a pretty relative term for... I mean, what would be considered normal for an ancient relic that controls and maintains the time stream? In fact, with all of that temporal energy swirling and coalescing at a single point, space and time itself could get warped and...
Eh, moving on...
Right, so usual day at the Gates of Time for Setsuna Meioh, as she spent her time scanning the time line for any changes or dark threats (because we can all see how that's been going... Metallia, Doom Tree, Wise Man, Pharaoh 90, Nehelania, Galaxia, Chaos... the list goes on), and, for the most part, being very very bored! She had also just decided that there was nothing that could go wrong on the path to building Crystal Tokyo.
Which was the perfect time for Murphy's Law to, once again, be put into effect. Setsuna looked at the Gates in surprise as a popup appeared.
YOUR COMPUTER MAY HAVE BEEN INFECTED. DO YOU WISH TO DOWNLOAD ANTI-VIRAL SOFTWARE?
Setsuna sweatdropped, and silently swore to herself. "Damn, this is what I get for letting them upgrade the Gates of Time to Windows XP. Of course, I was drunk at the time... and Bill was quite persuasive... stupid vodka."
ERROR! PLEASE CONTACT THE PLUTONIAN SYSTEM ADMINISTRATOR.
She growled before yelling at the Gates: "Kind of hard when he's been dead for thousands of years! It's been running smoothly for so long, and it chooses now of all times to break down?!"
As the Guardian of Time tried to debug the ancient device, a young goddess with a love for ice cream, and charged with the job of debugging the computer that runs existence, suddenly sneezed, and accidentally elbowed a nearby button. "Oops... BELL!!! URD!!! HELP!!!" Back at the Gates, Setsuna's face paled as more warning screens began flashing in quick succession.
FATAL ERROR HAS OCCURRED IN TIMEGATE_OS
ATTEMPTING RESTART...
ATTEMPTS SUCCEEDED: 0 ATTEMPTS FAILED: 1
CHRONAL VIRUS SPREAD IMMINENT
68 PERCENT OF ALL PROGRAMS CORRUPTED
ERROR! 3RR0R! 3P\R00/R!!
\^/4R|\|1|\|G \/\/1|_|_ R081|\|50|\|!
POSSIBILITY OF PAN-DIMENSIONAL DISRUPTION POSSIBLE (How redundant...)
98 PERCENT OF ALL |>ROGRAMS CORRUPTED
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