Scenes from Baldr's tragic life.
"Mommy, why can't I go hunting with Daddy?"
"Silly boy, it's dangerous. You're too little. Come, I'll teach you how to bake oatmeal raisin cookies."
"But Thor's going too! He's not that much bigger than I am!"
"It's a waste of time. They always end up catching things we can't eat."
"But you went hunting with them last time too!"
"You're not going, and that's that! Now bring me the flour, and wipe the counter top."
"I didn't say anything when you brought back that milksop and a bastard son. I let you keep your wolves and your ravens. And then there was that child you had with that skanky giantess. And now you bring back a... a... who is this anyway? Another of your bastards?"
"Hi, sis, I'm Loki."
"What? So your tomcatting around runs in the family?!"
"Frigg, honey, it's not like that. Listen-"
"I have had enough! You're never home, you fool around, you bring home dirty animals and you neglect our poor son... I want a divorce! I'm moving out, and I'm taking Baldr with me!"
Baldr covered his head with his pillow.
"Mom, I'm ok! I just stubbed my toe!"
"Oh, Baldr. What did I do wrong? Why can't you take care of yourself? What is that?!"
"I tripped! I skinned my knee! Everybody does that! Thor broke his arm last week and got bitten by a giant snake two weeks ago!"
"You see? How can I not worry when you're like this? I give up. Do what you like. I'll take care of everything."
"Hey, watch out! Oh, ouch! I'm sorry. Are you all right?"
"What was that?"
"Oh good, Mjollnir's fine. I'm so sorry, Mjollnir, my hand slipped."
"Your priorities are a little off, Thor. Fortunately Baldr doesn't seem to be hurt. Hmm..."
"What are you doing, you crazy bastard?"
"Cool, lend me Mjollnir."
"My Mjollnir! Oh, wow. This is so cool, Baldr."
"I'm not a toy! Stop throwing things at me!"
"Why on earth are we celebrating this pagan festival? I don't think these are even real traditions. Don't we have something like this too?"
"Why turn down a perfectly good excuse for a party?"
"Are you supposed to use the whole bush and the stick it grows on? And it doesn't look very secure- mmph- what was that?!"
"Merry Christmas; you were under the mistletoe."
"Was that the sound of rope breaking- AAAH."
"What have you done?!? You killed my darling son!"
"It was an accident! Wait, you didn't ask the mistletoe?"