There is more than one side to every story. This is how Michael saw Connie's breakdown at the end of the first Godfather movie.
(#) Anon 2006-10-08 07:21:58 AMYour writing sux! Obvious from your lack of reviews, you should stop. Hell, except from some crappy one-shots, you can't even finish a story. Add to that, you're posting here on this shitty-ass website (not a real one like FictionAllet or FFN), and it just goes to show you blow. Do us all a favor and take up another hobby. Writing isn't for you.
- Well, as promised, I came and read. Very interesting take on Michael's thoughts. Now, while I disagree with the other reviewer, I do have a few issues with this. Grammar being one and for the other. There are some punctuation issues that could be cleared up with a bit of attention.
The biggest thing, though, is the lack of substance. You tell a good story, but it lacks depth. More description would help. Some of the sentences could be combined to form paragraphs. I think work in the form is definately needed.
Otherwise, I found this very much in line with the book and the movie. Thank you for sharing.
(#) ilovefrankieieroxx 2011-10-19 11:26:01 AMI know you wrote this ages ago but I've only just seen this because I think The Godfather is just amazing. I think this is really good. Better than mine yet i just write about a band I like. But I'm thinking of writing in other category such as this. So thank you for giving me some inspiration. I disagree extremely with the first reviewer. I'm dyslexic so I'm not good with punctuation and grammar, spelling and shit like that. But I really like this. Thank you.