Categories > Cartoons > Teen Titans > Aftermath Trilogy: To Love and Hate You

Mixed Emotions

by Slades_Downfall 1 review

Raven's journey inside her mind reveals a startling truth about herself while Changeling contemplates her pending demise.

Category: Teen Titans - Rating: PG-13 - Genres: Drama - Characters: Raven - Warnings: [!] - Published: 2006-09-30 - Updated: 2006-09-30 - 1280 words

0Unrated
Chapter Six: Mixed Emotions

Raven quietly wiped away the dust off her mirror. It had been 10 years since she'd used this mirror. This wasn't an ordinary mirror, thought. This was her mirror, the one that showed all her emotions in her mind. It'd been a long while since she'd been in her own mind and now she felt like she needed to pay herself a visit. The mirror swirled before her and she was sucked into her mind. It spun for awhile, but then it settled and she landed on the great vastness that was her mind.

Instead of the bleak, barren, emotionless ground that had been the mind of Raven, there was the lush, green, life filled mind of Angel, who Raven was now that she could express her emotions. She looked around. She smiled as she spotted her emotions, Rage, Timid, Happy, Wisdom, Knowledge and a newcomer she didn't quite recognize. She walked over to them saying nothing.

They were sitting around a table, drinking what she thought was some kind of punch, like the stuff you see at weddings. Raven saw an empty chair and figured it was for her, so she sat down. Wisdom smiled and looked at her, "Well, Raven, it's been awhile since you paid us a visit."

Rage was glowering, "Yeah, it's been a long time since I've been out too," Rage actually looked perky as she said her next words, "It was nice of you to let me out two nights ago. I enjoyed that you know."

"Don't remind me," Raven glared at her emotion.

She turned to the rest of her emotions, who weren't really saying anything.

"So, why are you all here, and what is this stuff?" She pointed to the 'punch bowl'.

Knowledge pointed to the bowl, "This is Euphoria, your happiness," she explained.

Raven looked over at Happy, who was drinking the stuff and looked like she was intoxicated. "Someone spiked my drink...this feels so good," she let out a slurred chuckle, "I wish this would last forever...Whee!" She settled back, sipping, "I've died and gone to Heaven."

"I'll send you to Heaven if that's what you want," Rage scowled at Happy. All the other emotions stared at her,

"SHUT UP, RAGE!" They all shouted, and Raged, still staring daggers at the rest of them, sipped hers while muttering unintelligible insults under her breath.

Raven turned to Wisdom and Knowledge, "So, what do all my feelings mean?"

"Don't ask us," Wisdom replied. "Ask Love that question," Knowledge finished for her Sister Wisdom. Raven frowned, "Love, where is she?"

"Right next to you," Love answered, "My sister Lust is with me, I wish you would go away." She glared at Lust.

"Sorry, sister, I can't," Lust was all sarcasm.

Raven was slightly uncomfortable, "Um, where'd you both come from?" "We're your emotions, Raven, we come out when you feel us."

Raven was troubled, "I know I have feelings for Gar-"

"Heck yeah," Love interrupted, "He's sweet on you!"

"And he is a good looker," Lust pointed out, gleam in her eyes, "You did like that kiss."

"That was a total embarrassment," said Timid, who had appeared out of nowhere at the table and was grabbing some Euphoria 'punch'.

"Well Timid, took you forever," Rage smirked.

"Quiet Rage," Wisdom said, irked, "She's here like the rest of us, now." Knowledge looked at Raven inquisitive, "Want some punch?"

Raven frowned, then she picked up the remaining glass and poured herself some of that 'punch', whatever it was. She quietly sipped it and felt the wonderful feeling of well, euphoria wash over her. It was the same feeling she had when she was in Gar's arms, except he wasn't there. "Why are you drinking this stuff? And why is it still here?'

"Because," explained Wisdom, "You still feel this way about him. He's made you feel this way, only you don't really want to admit it."

"That explains why this," she gestured to the 'punch' bowl, "is here. That doesn't explain why all of you are here. What is this? Some kind of board meeting of my emotions?"

"Well," Knowledge said quite simply, "Yes, we're trying to decide, along with you, well, since you're us and we're you, what to do with her," she gestured at love. "Do we put her away in the recesses of your mind or do we let her out and see what happens?"

"I really don't want to be here," Timid piped up, "I don't see the point why I'm here. I'm not needed."

"Timid, if you don't stop I will come over there and smack you upside the head!" Rage was fuming and squeezing her glass tightly.

"Rage, calm yourself!" Wisdom snapped, "You're not helping anything."

"I can't calm down. I'm Rage, duh!"

"QUIET, BOTH OF YOU!" Raven roared out, frustrated, "this isn't helping me any!"

"So Raven, what will it be?" Wisdom asked. "Let Love out?

Or bury it deep inside?" Knowledge finished. "I"ll let her stay," Raven said, looking at love who had been silent the whole time. "I do love him, I admit that much."

"I see, at last I can come out," Love smiled, "This has been something I've always wanted," she took a glass and poured the 'punch' into it.

"To life, Love and Happiness," she raised it in a toast. "To life, Love and Happiness," the emotions, including Timid repeated, except for Rage, who muttered it out. Raven downed the last of her euphoria and sighed, "It's been a hard day, my head's still spinning."

Love put a hand on her shoulder, "Don't worry Raven, I will guide your Heart where it needs to go. All you need to do is trust me."

Raven smiled her gratitude, "Thank you, I must go now."

"Your welcome," all her emotions told her. "Good night, Raven."

"Good night emotions," she replied and stepped out of her mirror. Her room was quiet as she got into her bed, exhausted.

The feeling of euphoria still lingered in her mind, as well as Love's words, "I will guide your Heart where it needs to go. All you need to do is trust me." Raven fell into a deep sleep.


Gar Logan silently lay in his bed in his headquarters, he thought of Angel, and how he felt about her. He loved her, he came to that conclusion, he knew that. But what of the 'love' he had for Raven. I was a fool. That was puppy love, nothing more, she never loved me. He thought bitterly. He turned his thoughts back to Angel, why was it that he thought of Angel and Raven interchangeably? He didn't know why, he smirked, slightly, thinking of a Jealous Raven glaring at him from somewhere as he was with Angel.
"Whatever," he said to himself, 'Raven's my past, and I hate her...Angel's my present and I love her...I wonder, just who is Angel anyway?" He asked himself aloud, "She's so secretive, she won't tell me anything about herself. I know she owns the Brewers, but that's it..."

He rolled over, "Ah, forget it," he told himself. "Just go to sleep Gar, you can reek havoc on the Titans in the morning...and choke the life out of that Raven I 'loved.'" he smiled, "but first, I have some business with Angel...I wonder if she could find Raven for me? From the way that conversation went, it seems she hates her." That thought made him chuckle, "Good. I like hatred in a woman. Makes her more attractive." He smiled and fell asleep, dreaming of his beautiful Angel and the wheezing gasps of a dying Raven.
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