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by Bad_Wolf 1 Reviews

And he is dying, lying immobile on the floor, and all he can think about is where his siblings are because Peter has always been that sort of person.

Category: Chronicles of Narnia - Rating: G - Genres: Angst - Characters:  - Published: 2006/11/03 - Updated: 2006/11/04 - 282 words - Complete

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    (#) bgoldnyxnet 2008-12-16 03:25:50 PM

    I'm about out of rating points, but I think the last rating I saw got it right: ambience.

    This felt real. Lewis kind of glossed over the whole dying thing -- a sudden jolt, and they're in Narnia but more real than the real one.

    If I were to make one change, I would take out the phrase, "Peter was that kind of person." Just let the actions and thoughts convey what needs to be said -- they don't need any author's P.O.V. comments.

    But even that's a minor quibble. Thank you.

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