While on a mission, Tseng tries to ignore the fact that Reno, Rude, and Elena are only speaking two phrases each. Sometimes he wonders why he puts up with them.
AN: Okay, this idea just randomly popped into my head today during school. I can defiantly see Reno doing something like this, although it will be ooc because they wouldn't be playing this during a dangerous mission...one would hope so at least. Anyway, this is my first Final Fantasy piece, and it's humor, away from my normal angst so we'll see how this turns out. Hope you guys enjoy!
Disclaimer: There is no POSSIBLE way I could ever own Final Fantasy, and the game '2 line vocabulary' is from who's line is it anyway? So I take no credit for the game.
Two Line Vocabulary
"Now stay on alert," Tseng said to the three Turks behind him. "We've made it to the command center but someone could come back any moment. This is the crucial point in the mission, so be careful."
"When do we go to the bar?" Reno interrupted, sounding completely serious.
Tseng rolled his eyes. "After we finish the mission Reno, now be quiet and watch for the target."
There was a tense silence for a few minutes as the four watched the security cameras for their target. It was only a matter of time before Archer came to see what was going on, then they could take him out and get out of there.
He has to many followers, so because of a couple stay guards down he should just come to check the cameras on his own, but he won't expect us to be here. As long as we're quiet he'll walk right in without even knowing he's walked right into our trap.
Elena's voice interrupted Tseng's thought process, her comment making his head shift to her face abruptly.
Tseng just looked at her for a minute. "I understand waiting here isn't the most exciting of plans but it's what we're doing. It shouldn't take much longer." Elena shrugged and turned her eyes back to the cameras.
Tseng blinked and looked first at Reno, then Rude. "Don't ask me," Rude stated simply.
Tseng sighed and was about to turn back to the cameras when Reno began talking. "What's that?" he asked, pointing toward a device on the control pad.
"I'm not quite sure," Tseng answer.
"Should I push this?" Elena asked, pointing to the button Reno had just pointed out.
"Considering we do not know what it does, no Elena, you should not push it."
"When do we go to the bar?" Reno asked again, feet propped up against the control panel with one eye watching for Archer, the other focused on Tseng.
Tseng sighed. "I told you, once we finish the mission. Can we focus?"
Rude looked at Reno and smirked slightly. "You're an idiot," he told Reno, who stood up and walked over to Rude abruptly. Concentrating on his head, he jabbed a finger at Rude's bald head.
Rude gritted his teeth. "Don't ask me." Reno grinned, and satisfied with the response, moved away.
"I'm bored," Elena complained, spinning around in the chair that Reno had previously occupied.
Tseng sighed and rubbed his temples, hoping that they wouldn't continue whatever this new bet was for the rest of the mission.
"You're an idiot," Rude said.
"You better not be talking to me," Tseng commented, facing Rude. Rude said nothing, and before Tseng could begin to speak once more, Reno had once again began talking.
"What's that?" he asked, pointing to a large red button.
"That's the self destruct button," Tseng said alarmed, dragging Reno away from it, not trusting Reno not to push it with his childlike curiosity. I'm not allowing him near another self destruct button after the last incident. Tseng thought to himself.
"Should I push it?" Elena asked, moving her finger towards the button. Just as she was about to hit it, Tseng grabbed her and pulled her backwards.
"No do NOT push it!"
"You're an idiot."
"When do we go to the bar?"
Tseng growled. "All of you stop this! What kind of bet do you have going on anyway?" he asked, looking at each Turk in turn.
Rude shrugged. "Don't ask me."
"I'm bored," Elena complained, pouting. Tseng had to fight the urge to throw the very large rolling chair at her, or maybe Reno. Yes, this was probably all Reno's doing, he deserved it more.
"Should I push this?" she asked, gesturing to a power button of some sort.
"No! Do not push any buttons, I don't know what half this stuff does, and we will go to the bar AFTER the mission Reno!" he yelled.
The three just stared at him for a moment before Reno turned to Rude with a questioning look on his face. "Don't ask me," Rude responded.
Tseng's fists clenched and he was seriously considering throwing that chair at Reno when the sudden sound of many footsteps caught his attention. He turned toward the door just in time to realize what was happening. "Everyone behind here!" he yelled. The four Turks fell low to avoid the sudden gunfire.
"We were being to loud," Tseng muttered.
"You're an idiot."
Tseng stared at Rude for a moment before pulling out his gun. "You three are in serious trouble when he get out of this mess!"
Reno winced as a bullet gazed his arm, but amusement was glinting in his eyes.
Elena reached for her gun. "Should I push this?" Elena asked as she clicked the safety off.
"YES! I hope you're still not bored Elena," Tseng growled.
"When do we go to the bar?"
Tseng growled and prepared his assault. Why do I put up with these three?
AN: Yes, my short attempt at Final fantasy humor. Not up to my best standards but I've wanted to write SOMETHING final fantasy for a long time so here it is, let me know how I can improve. Hopefully next time I can make a plot filled story.