This takes after the infamous Shrieking Shack incident when Remus and Sirius were young pups (the Shack scene is not mentioned in the films but in the books)
Author: Lady Remus
Word Count: 1,820 words
Warnings: swearing, a wee bit of violence and a lot of angst
Summary: This takes after the infamous Shrieking Shack incident when Remus and Sirius were young pups (the Shack scene is not mentioned in the films but in the books)
Disclaimer: The original characters come from the mind of J K Rowling. I don't own them and I'm certainly not making any profit from this.
Beta Reader: This is not beta read but of anyone wants to beta read it, then just send me a message and I will pass a copy of the fic onto you so you can work on it.
Author's Notes: This was written for the Lupercalia/Valentine's Day challenge at the Sirius Black and Remus Lupin Yahoo Group. The prompt I chose from the very long list was:
1976 - The shack incident and/or its consequences
My reason was that at the time, I was thinking of writing a scene involving the consequences after looking through my memories and seeing a set of wonderful art works depicting the scene itself by the LJ user caladan-dd. Then this challenge came up and I just had to grab this point. And then I was told that the boss at the Yahoo Group that on the 15th of February 1976 there was a full moon which helped me out with my plot bunny. I always knew what the ending to this would be although I hate myself for ending it like this. Oh well, if there is enough demand for a sequel, then I'll think about doing one.
Review: Yes please
The early February morning air was crisp and cold but that did not bother Sirius Black at all. He had no concept of time except when the sun had started to rise. He had been waiting outside the Whomping Willow ever since the somewhat talk he and James had received from Professor Dumbledore. Sirius knew that Dumbledore was stern but he had never seen the headmaster look so angry before. Of course, Dumbledore never got angry unless it was for a very good reason and well, what Sirius had done was a good enough motive to aggravate the teacher.
Anyway, the talk had ended several hours earlier and after receiving a month's detention, he, James and Snape had been sent to bed. Of course, James had gone and wanted Sirius to join him but Sirius did not want to. He had stated that what had happened had been his own fault and his alone. Therefore, it was he alone who should go and find Remus.
And now, from his secret hiding place, he watched as Dumbledore entered the Willow and then after a time, the headmaster reappeared from the tree. Sirius became concerned that Remus was not with him. As soon as Dumbledore was out of view, Sirius ran towards the Willow and down the passageway.
As he took a quick pace, Sirius' imagination began to take hold as he worried for his beloved Remus. The two had been a couple for six months and they had not told a soul, as of yet. It had taken Sirius three months beforehand to declare his feelings for the werewolf and the actual moment itself had been accidental. What had started off as a mock wrestling match ended becoming a snogging session that seemed to last forever but even that had not been long enough for Sirius to enjoy Remus' touch.
And now, as he reached the Shrieking Shack, he knew that something was wrong with Remus and he knew it was all because of his own stupidity. He searched every room of the Shack, fearing the worst had happened. He knew how remotely sensitive and self-conscious Remus was about his condition.
Of course, that thought went out of the window when you decided to be smart, didn't it, Black?
Oh, shut up, brain! I don't need your shit right now.
When he opened the only remaining door, he sighed with relief. He was so relieved that he would have laughed if it was not for the sight in front of him. Remus was curled up in the corner. He was back in his school uniform (minus the jumper, tie and cloak)--Sirius knew that Remus stripped before a full moon as to save on clothing bills and Sirius could already see patches of blood seeping through the white shirt. That was not what concerned Sirius though--it was the look on Remus' face that made his stomach become heavy with guilt. Remus looked very sad and as he was huddled up, it seemed to Sirius that he was staring into space, as if he was trying not to remember what had happened.
"Remy?" Sirius whispered. When he received no reply, Sirius spoke a little louder. "Remy?" Again, there was no reply from his boyfriend--in fact Remus did not move a muscle. It was as if Sirius was trying to talk to a statue.
Sirius walked over to the corner and knelt down on the floor. He placed his hand gently on Remus' shoulder and the werewolf reacted by shrugging it off roughly.
Remus replied coldly and without looking at Siirus. "Fuck off!"
Sirius had never heard Remus swear or speak to anyone in such a cold or harsh tone before.
But then again, the voice in his head taunted. You have never done anything like this before. First time for everything, right?
"Oh shut up!" Sirius muttered to himself,
Remus turned his head fiercely towards Sirius. "You have no right to tell me to shut up after what you did!"
"What?" Sirius was confused and then he realised. "Oh no, I wasn't telling you to shut up. It's just..." Sirius found that he could not finish what he wanted to say so he simply murmured. "Nothing."
Remus nodded and turned his head away again. "Yeah, nothing. Just like our relationship, I guess."
Sirius closed his eyes. "Remus, it wasn't like that."
"Well, what was it like then? Did you run out of good ideas? Is that it? That is so unlike you." Remus spat out the words in disgust.
Sirius insisted. "I wish I knew what came over me, Remus. I just didn't think, that's all."
"Well, that's news coming form you and James, the brains of Hogwarts."
"Now, wait a minute! James has nothing to do with this!"
"Liar! I saw him with Snape!"
"Yes, he was trying to stop my stupid plan form going through. He did not know anything until Snape had left for the Willow. It was all down to me so don't blame Prongs or Wormtail for this!"
"Yeah and I bet he sees the funny side of it. After all, you two are joined at the hip, aren't you? Great minds thinking alike and all that."
Sirius leaned against the wall and looked down at the floor. "No, he doesn't. He thinks I was a prat."
After a long and thick silence, Sirius sighed softly. "I love you, you know."
Remus looked at Sirius and said bitterly "You got a funny way of showing it."
Sirius looked up at Remus and his heart almost broke at the hurt look on the werewolf's face. And yet, he could not look away from him--it would have been wrong. "Moony, I'm sorry." He insisted. "I swear, I just didn't think."
"Oh I think you did, Sirius. You just thought of the wrong person. When Professor Dumbledore told me what you did, I couldn't believe it. I mean, the previous night, we were celebrating Lupercalia and it was wonderful. I kept thinking "No, not Sirius. He wouldn't do that to me. I mean, just the other night, he told me that he loved me. And yet, why would Dumbledore lie to me like that?" But he didn't lie, did he? You did do it. After telling me that you love me more than anything, you go and do this to me."
"I wasn't doing it to you. It was for..."
"Snape, I know. But don't you realise that not only did you put Snape in danger, you put me in danger!" Remus pointed a finger at his own chest. "Me! I trusted you with my biggest secret and you betrayed me! Or maybe I mean nothing to you."
"That's not true! You mean everything to me!"
Remus' eyes filled up with tears. "And you so proved it tonight didn't you? You know what I think? I think you see me as a novelty."
Sirius was gob smacked at this comment. "What?"
"You heard me!"
Sirius grabbed hold of Remus' arms. "You're not a novelty to me! You're one of my best friends and I love you!"
Remus forced the animagus' hands off him. "I don't believe you! You have no idea what it is like to be me, do you? You say you have read all about werewolves but I don't think you care at all! Anything could have happened! I could have killed him and being expelled from Hogwarts would have only been the start of it!"
"I don't want to hear from it anymore!"
Remus stood up and made his way out of the Shack. Sirius followed him and called after him. Remus ignored him and continued to move quickly down the passage way before exiting the Willow. Sirius started to run and he caught up with Remus, taking hold of his arm.
Remus stopped in his tracks and cried out angrily. "Let go of me!"
Sirius held onto him tighter and shook his head. Remus struggled to get free but Sirius' grip was too tight.
"Please what?" Remus was trying to mock Sirius' plea but his voice was too agitated. "Please what? Please WHAT!"
He shoved Sirius hard and they both toppled to the ground. Remus landed awkwardly and he felt a very numb but sore sensation in his arm. He stood up and started to walk away, rubbing his sore spot.
"Moony, are you alright?" He heard Sirius speak softly. Remus ignored him but then he felt a gentle hand on him. Sirius' voice was full of concern. "Please let me help you."
Remus turned around and shoved Sirius to the ground again. He towered over the animagus. "Haven't you helped me enough? I don't need you and I don't want you anymore so just leave me alone."
"Remus, you can't. Please don't throw our friendship away."
"ME throw our friendship away? ME! You really have got some nerve, have you? You threw it away the moment your hatred for Snape overthrew your caring for me!"
Remus paused and softly panted in released anger. He wanted to say more but he had nothing more to say and so he walked away, leaving Sirius alone on the ground, nearly in tears.
This time, Sirius did not even try to follow him. He knew that it was a hopeless situation. Instead, he simply sat cross-legged on the ground for what seemed to be an eternity. He hugged himself but this did not stop the cold form hitting his body. Like before, the weather did not bother him at all.
He started to think back to when he had celebrated Lupercalia. He could hardly believe that it had only happened two days earlier. In truth, Lupercalia actually happened the previous night but because of the full moon, Remus and Sirius had decided to celebrate it a night early. And what a beautiful night it had been for Sirius--a whole night in the Room of Requirement, not caring that they had to attend class the next day and...simply not caring about anything else at all. All that had mattered was being in his beloved's arms and stealing another secret and beautiful moment with him away from everything else.
And now, I'll never be able to do it with Remus again. Sirius thought sadly. What in Merlin's sake had I been thinking. I'm so fucking stupid! And I've lost James and Peter as well--I just know it--they'll just be as unforgiving as Remus and it's all my fault!
The voice in his head broke him completely and he started to cry. He did not care that he would be late for classes. He did not care that he could freeze to death. All he wanted to do now was simply wallow in his self-pity, the only warmth he could feel being the hot tears of shame flowing down his face.