He sighed and once more replayed the event in his head. He remembered everything so clear, especially the hurt look in her eyes. He could've died when he saw that look. He remembered thinking about...
Disclaimer: I don't own Class of the Titans or the song Forgive Me by Evanescence. I just own my story ideas.
Jay and Theresa had been spending lots of time together lately. They hadn't been going on 'dates' but one wouldn't know that just by looking at them. For the last two weeks they had gotten closer and closer. Things seemed so perfect... too perfect. So it was inevitable that it would soon end...
The two came in the front door around ten at night; they had gone out to see a movie. The others, not wanting to stay in on a Friday night went out as well, each off doing their own thing. The two were just glad for the silence. But lately it had been a little too quiet.
" I just love this!" Theresa exclaimed, plopping down on the couch, still laughing giddily from the movie they had seen.
" What's that?" Jay asked, also laughing.
Theresa rolled onto her stomach, placed her elbows on the arm of the couch and rested her chin on her hands. " The peace and quiet. It's just so... nice."
" Yeah it is." Jay agreed, heading into the kitchen for some drinks.
" It's just so great that we get to hang out like this. Not a care in the world." Theresa said dreamily as she closed her eyes.
Jay came back in from the kitchen, glasses of water in hand and smiled. He handed one of the glasses to Theresa and leaned against the doorframe. Something seemed to be troubling him and Theresa picked that up right away.
" What's wrong?" she asked, knowing him all too well.
" Oh it's nothing." Jay said, trying to hide his uneasiness.
" Come on Jay. I know you better than that. Tell me." Theresa pouted, sitting up now and facing him.
" It's been great hanging out with you and the peace and quiet but..." Jay trailed off.
" But... what?" Theresa asked, seeing the worried look in her leader's eyes.
" It's been too quiet. Don't you think?" Jay said.
" No. I think it's a nice change from our normally chaotic lives." Theresa stated, falling back onto the couch cushions.
" But Cronus must be planning something big. He hasn't caused any trouble lately." Jay mused.
" Maybe he's given up." Theresa said with a laugh, trying to lighten the mood.
" Theresa I don't think that-" But he was cut off.
" Jay you need to lighten up. It's called wishful thinking." Theresa said, giggling some more.
" I'm just worried that's all. It seems like things have been just too good lately." he said.
" Well haven't you been having fun?" Theresa asked, sitting up, a hopeful look in her eyes.
" Yeah, but..." Jay trailed off again, not looking at his companion.
" But..." Theresa urged him to continue.
" I don't we should do this anymore." Jay stated slowly, each word hurting him, but not as much as they hurt Theresa.
" What? Have fun?" Theresa asked, forcing a laugh to hide the pain she now felt.
" No. Hang out like this. We're just too vulnerable. If Cronus were to attack... I just think we should stay on our toes." Jay said, still avoiding Theresa's gaze.
" Oh." Theresa said quietly, tears forming in her eyes.
" Theresa I'm sor-"
" No Jay. It's okay. You're right. We need to be ready in case Cronus attacks." she said as she stood up and headed up the stairs.
Can you forgive me again?
I don't know what I said
But I didn't mean to hurt you.
Jay heaved a sigh then sat on the couch, right about the time the others all came back. Everyone was chatting happily and either went upstairs to their rooms or headed for the kitchen. Archie however saw Jay and went to talk to him.
" Hey man. How was your date with Theresa?" he asked, drawing out the word 'date' as slowly as possible.
" It was okay." Jay replied absent mindedly.
" Okay? Just okay? What's wrong? When ever you go out with Theresa you're always grinning like a fool for the entire night." Archie said.
" I blew it. Big time." Jay sighed.
" What'd you do?" Archie asked.
" I'm not really sure. Everything was great then I said that we should stay on our toes about Cronus then she left." Jay admitted, oblivious to what he had done wrong.
" There's your problem." Archie said with an all knowing smirk.
" What?" Jay asked, still not getting it.
" You and Theresa were having a great time then you went and killed that by talking about Cronus and being all serious." Archie said, laying it out painfully clear.
" Well we should be looking for anything suspicious. He hasn't attacked in a while. He must be planning something big." Jay tried to reason.
" No wonder Theresa left. We all know that Jay but... you have Cronus on the brain twenty four seven!" Archie said.
" I do n-"
" Yes you do." Archie cut him off.
" Well how do I fix this?" Jay asked, not really to Archie but he was open for suggestions.
" Can't help you there Jay. I try to avoid the Drama Queen as much as possible." Archie said as he went into the kitchen.
Jay sighed and then headed upstairs, replaying his talk with Theresa over and over in his mind, trying to figure out how he could fix things. He still had no clue what he was supposed to do. It wasn't everyday that he was faced with a choice like that. Eventually he fell into a restless sleep.
The next morning came quickly, as did all the others. Jay was always up early, even on weekends. He grabbed some coffee and headed to roof. He still had some thinking to do. He sat on the edge of the roof and watched the sun rise.
'I really loved spending time with Theresa but... I just didn't want to risk her getting hurt. Yet the more I try to protect her from Cronus the more I push her away and then... she just gets hurt anyways. I can fight an evil god bent on destroying the world so why can't I face Theresa?' He was lost in his thoughts, which only seemed to be confusing him more than he already was.
He sighed and once more replayed the event in his head. He remembered everything so clear, especially the hurt look in her eyes. He could've died when he saw that look. He remembered thinking about how he should say it, but any way that he could've worded it, it still would've come out wrong. He really hated hurting her but if it was to save her from something worse then... was it justified?
I heard the words
I felt like I would die
It hurt so much to hurt you
Jay was so deep in thought that he didn't hear someone come out onto the roof after him. The figure sat beside him and stared out at the city. Just watching the early morning sun chase away all the shadows.
" Couldn't sleep either?" a sweet voice asked.
Jay was snapped out of his thoughts and turned to face the person he was looking for but also trying to avoid. " Hey Theresa. Uhh, no. You?" he said after a moment of silence.
" It's the first day of spring. I never sleep in on the first day of spring. I just have to see the sun rise." she replied, her eyes scanning the horizon as the great orange ball rose slowly.
" Uhh, Theresa. About last night..." Jay trailed off, not really sure what he was going to say.
" Yeah?" Theresa watched as he tried to gather his thoughts.
" I've really had fun but..." he trailed off again.
" Look Jay, you made it clear last night. It's okay."
" No it's not. I just... want to make sure that you're okay."
" I'm fine. I had fun too but, all good things must come to an end."
" Theresa, there is nothing more I'd like to do then to just hang out with you and have fun-"
" Then what's the problem?" Theresa asked, her voice rising slightly.
" I just don't want you to get hurt."
" How would I? In case Cronus attacks? I can take you of myself you know."
" I'm just afraid that he might go after you if-"
" If what? He comes after all of us. You and me hanging out won't change that Jay."
" Theresa I really care about you. But-"
" If you care about me then why don't you want to be with me?"
" Because. If Cronus found out then he'd use you against me." Jay said standing up and running a hand through his hair.
" Jay I don't need to be treated like a child! I can hold my own as much as any one else." Theresa said, on the urge of shouting and crying.
" Because. If you care about someone you have to let them go." Jay said sadly, averting his eyes from Theresa's.
" No you don't. If you care about someone then you do all you can to keep them. You don't give up and let them walk away." Theresa said before heading to the door.
She stopped and turned to look at Jay. It was silent for a moment.
" I'm walking Jay. This is your last chance to stop me." her voice was softer.
" I'm sorry but... I can't." he replied, regretting each word as soon as they left his mouth.
Theresa turned and headed back to her room, tears streaking her face. Her heart had just been shattered into a thousand pieces that couldn't be put back together again. Well, not without help.
Jay was left on the roof, staring at the door.
Then you look at me
You're not shouting anymore
You're silently broken
Jay slumped to the ground and sat there. In his mind he knew that he had made the right choice, but in his heart... he had made the biggest mistake of his life. He tried to tell himself that it was for the best, that she'd thank him later. But, no matter how many times he said it, it still felt so wrong.
" What's with Theresa?" a voice asked from the doorway.
Jay lifted his head and turned towards the person, his eyes turning red from uncried tears.
" What's wrong with you?"
" It's nothing Atlanta." Jay said, turning back to stare into the depths of his half empty coffee mug.
" Riiight. It's nothing. Jay I may not be a genius like Odie but I know when something's wrong with one of my friends." Atlanta said, walking over to Jay and taking a seat next to him.
" I just wish that she'd understand." Jay muttered, more to himself than to her.
" Who?" Atlanta asked, pretty sure that she already knew the answer.
Jay sighed but he didn't answer. How could he? He didn't even know anymore.
Theresa had locked her door and flung herself onto her bed. She had been there only seconds when a knock came to her door.
" Go away!" she shouted, her words muffled by her pillow.
" Where's Atlanta?" the familiar voice of Archie floated through the door.
" Go away!" she shouted again, just wanting to be left alone in her misery.
" Jeez, what's wrong with you?" Archie asked.
" Just leave me alone." Theresa choked out between sobs.
Archie, hearing the pain in her voice, took a risk and slowly turned the doorknob. Finding it locked, he knocked again.
" I said leave me alone!"
" Theresa let me in." Archie said.
" Go away Archie!"
" Not until you tell me what's wrong." Archie said.
" Like you care!" Theresa yelled.
" As unbelievable as it is... I do." Archie said, his voice sincere and worried.
He heard moving in Theresa's room and the door's lock click open. Then the door was opened a crack and the tear worn face of Theresa peeked through.
" Can I come in?" he asked, he couldn't just leave her crying in her room all day.
Theresa gave a small nod then moved away from the door and let Archie in. He closed the door behind him and sat on the end of her bed. Theresa had buried her face in her pillow again.
" What happened?" Archie asked cautiously, not really sure how to deal with Theresa, or any girl for that matter, when they're like that.
" Did Jay send you?" Theresa asked coldly.
" No. I was passing by and heard crying. I may be heartless at times but I can't stand to see any girl cry." Archie confessed.
" Why does he have to be so confusing? He says that he wants to be with me but he can't because of Cronus. Why can't he just choose? If he doesn't want to be with me then he should've said what he did. And if he does then he shouldn't let Cronus stop him!" Theresa vented, while Archie listened.
" He just doesn't want you to get hurt." Archie said in Jay's defense.
" I can hold my own just like the rest of you." Theresa said, by now she was sitting up beside Archie.
" He knows that, but... if anything ever happened to you he'd never forgive himself." Archie said.
" Was I right?" Theresa asked, catching Archie completely off guard.
" Right to what?" Archie asked.
" Right to walk away. I gave him a chance to stop me but.... he didn't he just let me walk." she said in a low voice.
Archie wrapped his arms around Theresa and pulled her into a hug. He didn't really know how to comfort someone, especially Theresa, in a state like this. But, he did know that hugs were always the best way to go. Apparently his logic was right because Theresa thanked him and told him that Atlanta had gone to the roof.
I'd give anything now
To hear those words from you
When Atlanta had failed to get an answer from Jay she sighed and headed back into the house. On her way down she ran into Archie coming out of Theresa's room. He hadn't seen her so he jumped when she said his name.
" Playing a prank on Theresa?" she asked, knowing him all to well.
" No. Actually I was talking to her." Archie replied, surprising his spunky red haired companion.
" Seriously? Why?" Atlanta asked, not really believing him.
" She was upset so I tried to comfort her." Archie stated as he walked down the hall to his room.
Before Atlanta could get out another word, the door to the roof opened and Archie pulled Atlanta into his room.
" I need your help." he said.
" What for?" Atlanta asked, taking a seat on his computer chair and spinning around a few times.
" We need to fix things between Jay and Theresa." Archie said.
" Since when do you want to do anything to help Theresa?" Atlanta asked, raising an eyebrow.
" Look I have my reasons. Believe it or not but I don't hate her and if she's miserable then she'll make the rest of us miserable." he replied.
" Well what are we going to do? And what exactly are we fixing?" Atlanta asked.
Archie explained his plan and told Atlanta what Theresa had told him.
Theresa had come out of her room around noon and had gone down to the kitchen. The house had been relatively quiet all day so she figured the others had gone out. So, she was quite surprised to find Jay sitting in the kitchen. When Theresa entered the room he glanced up at her but then cast his glance down.
" We can't avoid each other forever." Theresa said as she opened the fridge and took out a bottle of water.
" I know but..." Jay trailed off again, he was having a hard time gathering his thoughts lately.
" Jay we're still friends. We need to work together to stop Cronus. And in order for that to happen we have to talk to each other." Theresa said, leaning against the counter.
" I just don't want to say anything else that will make you hate me." Jay muttered to himself but Theresa still heard it.
" Jay I don't hate you. I still care about and nothing will change that but... you need to make a choice." Theresa said.
" What do you mean?"
" You can either have me and trust that nothing bad will happen or... you can keep thinking that something bad will happen and let me walk away." Theresa said, closing her eyes to stop any tears from falling.
" I can't make a choice like that Theresa. It's crazy!" Jay said.
" Well you have to. I need to know Jay." Theresa said.
" Then..." he paused and lowered his eyes 'Either way I lose her. I'll either push her away or Cronus will take her away. I have to do what's best for her. Even if it hurts. I just couldn't stand losing her.', " I'm sorry."
Theresa just walked out of the kitchen and disappeared around the corner. And Jay was once again left regretting his words.
Each time I say something I regret
I cry "I don't want to lose you"
But somehow I know
That you will never leave me, yeah
Over the next few days both Jay and Theresa avoided each other like the plague. Neither of them wanted to face the pain again. But no matter how hard they tried, they always seemed to bump into each other.
In class Jay would always find himself looking over to Theresa. His heart would always break because he would see that hers was already broken... and it was all because of him.
He really wanted to be with her but he just couldn't risk it. He'd die if anything happened to her. He just kept telling himself that it was for the best. That he made the right decision. That it wasn't a mistake.
But again his head was telling him one thing and his heart was telling him the opposite. By the end of it all he was so confused that he couldn't think straight about anything. Little did he know that Theresa felt the same way.
Her head kept telling her that she should just accept it and move on. That she had made the right decision in making him choose. But her heart, her heart told her not to accept it. Not to go down without a fight and not to let go so easily.
'But he made the choice. He could've stopped me but he just let me go. He chose to let me walk. Why can't I just move on and forget this? Why do I feel like this is all so wrong? Why is this driving me so crazy? Why does love have to be so complicated?' Theresa's thoughts distracted her all night and engulfed her dreams all night.
Jay's thoughts were also along those lines. He found himself wondering all the same things. He just wished that Cronus was gone so that he could be with her. 'Maybe it just wasn't meant to be. Maybe this is how we're supposed to be... just friends. Who am I kidding? It's not supposed to be this way! Why am I so afraid?'
Jay had made up his mind. He knew that he had to follow his heart, it was the only thing making sense. He knew that he needed to tell Theresa how he really felt. There was just one problem. Every time he tried everything just came out wrong and his heart let his mind take over. No matter how good his intentions he'd always be hurting her.
He knew that he had to try everything to make her see how much she meant to him. If only he could find the right words.
'Cause you were made for me
Somehow I'll make you see
How happy you make me
Before long a week had passed. No Cronus yet, just peace and quiet. Jay and Theresa were both wrecks; they still hadn't talked to each other. In fact the two had been excused from classes, by Hera, so that they could get some rest. Though neither got any rest.
Theresa sat on the roof. She usually could untangle and sort through all her thoughts up there but it was so different then. Now all she could think about was Jay. She heaved a pain-filled sigh leaned back in her patio chair. How she wished things could go back to normal, well as normal as their lives were.
With no Cronus to fight, she and Jay had only been drifting further apart. There was no longer, well for the time being, nothing to force them together. They were both taking the easy way out, though to them it seemed to be unbearable.
Both Theresa and Jay had it set in their minds that they were right, and that they had made the right decision. Who knew that the right thing could be so hard?
" Ugh!" Theresa yelled at nothing.
She just wished that she could shut off her emotions and think clearly. They were blocking her judgement and it was driving her up the wall. She picked up the book she was going to attempt to read and chucked it across the roof top. It hit the far side of the roof with a 'thud'. Theresa crossed her arms over her chest and turned away from the book, as if it were the source of all her problems.
You never really think about what life would be like if you'd never met someone or if they just disappeared one day until they're gone. That's how Theresa felt. She wished she could control what was happening. She hated feeling powerless.
Jay was also home that day. He sat at the island in the kitchen. He had heard the 'thud' on the roof but made no effort to go see what it was. He just couldn't be around Theresa. As much as he wanted to be so close to her, he just couldn't. He was afraid that he'd make an even bigger mess of things.
He decided that he should eat something that day so he took out some left over spaghetti from the night before, Archie and Atlanta had made it, and put it in the microwave. If he hadn't been so out of it he might have realized that he forgot to take off the aluminum foil that was used to cover the spaghetti.
He put in the time and went to sit back at the island. As soon as he sat down a loud 'BANG' echoed through the air, accompanied by sparks and a small explosion.
Theresa had closed her eyes and was in a nice peaceful state when she heard it. A loud 'BANG'. She jumped up out of her chair and the only thing that went through her mind was: 'Jay!'
She raced down the three flights of stairs and was welcomed by a grey smoke at the bottom. She coughed a few times and tried to clear the smoke away but it didn't work.
" Jay?" she called out, completely forgetting all her mixed emotions, for now there was only one; fear.
When she didn't receive an answer she started to panic. " Jay? Jay?" she called again.
Stumbling through the smoke she found the kitchen doorway and tried her best to see through the haze that filled the air. Theresa saw a dark figure lying on the ground. She quickly opened the side door, beside the fridge, and then dropped to his side.
" Jay? Jay? Can you hear me?" she called, shaking his shoulders.
" Hmmmm..... Theresa?" Jay mumbled, then coughed a few times.
Theresa hugged him as the smoke slowly left the house.
" Are you okay? What happened?" she asked, concern written in her eyes and lacing her shaky voice.
" I'll be fine but I can't say the same for Athena's microwave." Jay said with a small laugh.
Theresa smiled and helped him up. She made sure that he wasn't hurt and then slapped his arm.
" Ow! What was that for?" he asked, looking at her with pure shock on his face.
" You scared the hell out of me! I thought something horrible had happened!" Theresa shouted.
" I didn't think you cared like that anymore." Jay said in a low voice.
" Jay, I... I still care about you. When I heard that explosion...I thought the worst. And if anything did happen... I just wouldn't be able to live without you." Theresa said in a small voice.
I can't live this life
Without you by my side
I need you to survive
" Now do you get why I can't be with you?" Jay asked, regaining his thoughts which were now, more or less, in order.
" Is that... did you do this just to prove something?" Theresa asked, anger in her voice.
" What? No! But what you felt... that's how I'd feel everyday." Jay said.
Theresa groaned, sometimes he could be so frustrating.
" Jay... I can't do this." she said.
" Do what?" he asked, confused.
" I can't not see you everyday. It's completely screwing up everything! Why is everything so different now?" she replied, looking him right in the eyes, looking for her Jay.
" I know what you mean. It's like torture." Jay admitted.
" Then why can't we be together?" she asked, her eyes begging to be clear of confusion.
" Theresa we just can't. I don't want to lose you. If Cronus ever found out-"
" Jay! Would you stop it already. If you don't want to lose me then stop pushing me away. And who cares if Cronus finds out? Remember what Hermes said? Our strength comes from being a team. With us like this our team, not to mention the world, is doomed. Jay I can't live like this anymore." Theresa said, her eyes watering.
" I'm sorry but I'm not going to take that risk. If anything every happened..."
" Stop. Just stop. Stop with all the ifs and all the doubts. Jay do you care about me?"
" Theresa I-"
" Just answer please. Do you care about me?"
" Of course I do but-"
" But nothing. Why are you letting Cronus have this... this power over you? If you care about and he found out about that then wouldn't he use me against you anyways, whether or not we were together?"
" Theresa. It's not that simple." Jay said.
" Well I'm going to make it simple. Jay I need to know for real. Do you or don't you care about me? If you do then you wouldn't let anything keep you away from me. If you don't then..." she trailed off.
" I want to be with you Theresa. Believe me. But-"
" Then stay. Stay here with me." Theresa said, her eyes pleading with him.
" I..." Jay stopped himself.
He noticed in Theresa's eyes something that he'd never seen there before. It was fear. He could just tell by her eyes that it was eating away at her, and he knew how that felt. The two stood there for the longest time, just looking into each others eyes. Their eyes were the only things that showed how they really felt.
So stay with me
You look in my eyes
And I'm screaming inside that I'm sorry
" Please Jay." she whispered so softly that it wasn't audible.
" Theresa..." Jay started but stopped.
He looked into her eyes again and he just couldn't hurt her anymore. He wrapped his arms around her and pulled her into a hug. She felt so safe in his arms, the safest she had felt in a long time.
" Can you forgive me for being such an idiot?" Jay asked in a whisper.
" No." Theresa said making Jay pull out of the hug and look at her questioningly.
" But..." Jay was really confused now.
" But, we can start over and forget all of this." she finished with a smile.
Jay pulled Theresa close to him and kissed her. She kissed him back, deepening the kiss. The two stood there for awhile, held in each other's brace. Theresa had her arms draped around Jay's neck and Jay had his arms wrapped around Theresa's waist.
Neither of them had felt so happy and full of joy in what seemed like centuries.
" Jay?" Theresa asked when they ended their kiss.
" Yeah?" he asked, resting his forehead on hers.
" I think that we should clean all this up before Athena sees it." she laughed.
Jay looked around and realized that Theresa was right. If Athena saw that she would've hit the roof. So Theresa grabbed two brooms and a garbage bag and the two got started.
He looked over at her and saw that all her confusion was gone. And his heart no longer told him he made the wrong choice. Theresa felt the same way too.
Once everything was cleaned up and the kitchen was straightened up the two walked into the living room and collapsed onto one of the couches. Theresa swung her legs up and laid them across Jay's. Then she rested her head on his chest and slowly drifted off to sleep. Jay rested his head atop hers and too found himself able to fall into the world of pleasant dreams once again.
The others came back after school was out and found the two asleep like that. Atlanta pulled Archie aside.
" I guess we didn't need that great plan of yours after all." she said with a smirk.
" Maybe." Archie said with a smirk of his own, leaving Atlanta a little confused.
Things were finally back to normal.
And you forgive me again
You're my one true friend
And I never meant to hurt you
A/N: Okay yes I know such a horrible ending but it's almost two in the morning here and I was home sick today. Well I hope you liked it. I may not get all the others up this weekend but I will have at least one more up, it'll be an A/A one so keep an eye out for that. Don't forget to send a review my way letting me know your thoughts. Not much else to say here so Cheers!;D