FicWad

Hiding in the shadows watching the man he had loved. The one who betrayed his trust. Spencer partied on with his friends not even noticing that he was being watched. Laughing at his friend's jokes with out a care.


: Flashback: Gerards pov:


A cute black haired guy sat down beside me. God what an enchanting smile. "Hi." I said looking his way.
"Hello." He responded. Looking up from the drink he had just been given.
"I'm Gerard." I spoke again this time holding out my hand. He smiled again. " Spencer." He said as he took my hand in his and shook it.
We talked for hours about anything and everything. Laughing at each other's jokes and hilarious comments about the people in the bar. But what really stood out that night was our conversation about our careers. He was in a band called Panic! At The Disco. Then I told him I was in My Chemical Romance. We talked for hours about our trips around the world and of how we both missed our homes. The clock struck 2:00.
"Well, I guess it's about time I headed to the hotel." I said looking at my empty glass. As I got up to leave Spencer took a hold of the crick of my arm. " Here's my number. Call me whenever you get the chance." Spencer handed me a napkin with his number, I placed it in my pocket. Taking my hand I softly touched his cheek and leaned in kissing him lightly on the lips.
"There..." I said smiling. "... something to take with you." And I walked away.


: End of flashback:


Sitting in the shadows Gerard kept watch on Spencer. Who was now making-out with some guy. Something in Gerard made feel jealous, angry, and even more betrayed. Gerard sat there thinking about how this relationship could go so
wrong.

: Flashback: 3 months after they first met:


I was looking at nothing in particular when I bumped into some one slightly taller then me. As I raised my head to apologize I couldn't believe what I was seeing. "Spencer?" I said with my mouth wide open.
Smiling at me he replied. "Hey Gerard. God it feels like a year has gone by." He said sitting down at a near by bench. I followed and sat down next to him. "Yea it does." I said smiling back. We sat there for what seemed like hours just catching up with each other's lives and how things were with our bands and the many concerts we did.
: Later that same night:
I brought Spencer up to my room. As I unlocked and opened the door to my hotel room Spencer pushed me in and into a wall as he shut the door himself. He then kissed me with unrivaled passion. Passion that made me feel lighter than air, but I soon realized as he broke the kiss. That I was being carried over to the bed; where he laid me down sweetly. Spencer gazed into me eyes as if he were trying to read my soul, before he started to undress me from the waist down. Trailing kisses down my abdomen. I giggled a little at the tickling sensation left by his kisses. Spencer rose back up letting my shirt fall back down to my stomach. His fingers lightly grazed the collar of my black silk shirt, undoing the first button as his lips met mine. When he finished with my shirt he quickly disposed of his own. Spencer then motioned for me to spread my pale legs. I did. Spencer gently, but quickly prepared my tight entrance before sliding in. "Aahh." I cried as sweet warmth began to fill me. Our Bodies then began a steady rhythm. His kisses were sweet, but yet passionate as he sped up his rhythm. I slowly started feeling a burning want for release. Spencer cried out as he reached his climax, I followed soon after.

: End of flashback:

Tears fell down as Gerard thought back to his first time with Spencer. Gerard slammed his fist down onto the table, rattling his drink. "Damn you Spencer, How could you do this to me?" he said mainly to himself. Gerard watched as his own band mates came up and talked with Spencer. Frankie always made Spencer laugh at the stupidest things. Gerard leaned back into the wall trying his best to stay in the dark. His breath had shorten, for a second it felt like Spencer was looking his way but Spencer soon turned back to the conversation between him and Frankie. Gerard just watched as his friends started to comfort Spencer. Wondering what that was about. Gerard took a sip of his drink. 'Maybe I should just go over there and talk to him.' Gerard thought. 'But what if he rejects me? What if he doesn't want to speak to me?'

: Flashback: 2 months ago:

I came home tired and worn out from recording at the studio. As I opened the door to my apartment I heard something clang on the kitchen floor. I approached the swinging door of the kitchen I quietly open the door only to be affronted with an intoxicating aroma. I looked in and saw Spencer cooking. I smiled at the sentiment. I quietly close the kitchen door and walk back to the front door I had left opened. I close the door and took off my hoodie, hanging it on the coat rack. I walked into the living room and turned on the t.v. to watch the news. As soon as I sat down in my big comfy chair Spencer came in and put his arms around my neck. "Hi, beautiful." He said as he kissed my cheek. "Dinners almost ready, so go wash up." Spencer pulled away and walked back into the kitchen. "Alright." I said as I got back up, heading for the bathroom leaving the t.v. on. I washed up and headed toward the kitchen. As I entered the room delicious smells filled the air. "Spencer, What did you make?" I sat down at the table waiting for him to bring the meal. " Well, I couldn't figure out what you would like to have so I made a four meat and cheese casserole with mashed potatoes and gravy." Spencer said as he put the casserole dish on a heat pad.
Spencer went back to the oven and pulled out mashed potatoes. "Mashed potatoes in the oven?" I questioned. "Yes, to keep them warm for dinner." Spencer replied. All through dinner it was quiet.
: 30 minutes later:
"So how was practice today?" Spencer asked as he cleared the table. I watched him put the dishes in the sink. "It was eventful I guess." I replied getting up to help with the dishes. "Are you ready for this weekend, Spence?"
"About that..." Spencer said.
"What you're going to cancel on me again?" I asked
"Gerard, you know that I love you, but the tour is coming up and I can't ask my bandmates to postpone it, again." Spencer said defensively. I looked away a little hurt. I know I should have not had made that face, but I couldn't help but feel let down, I mean we planned this weekend together for months. "Didn't you tell them we had this planned?" I asked still not looking up from the floor.
"No, I didn't I..." "What!" I said loudly.
""Don't shout Gerard, I'm right here." he said getting angry.
"Why shouldn't I? I've been waiting for this weekend to come for months." I shouted back. Just then I felt a hand smack me across the face. I looked up to see anger in Spencer's eyes. "You slapped me?" I said a little confused.
"Yes, I did. It seemed like you needed it." He said as he went back to the dishes. After that all hell broke loose in the kitchen. As I helped dry the dishes Spencer kept on about how I was being too clingy and that I was too childish at times. I yelled back telling him to shut the fuck up but he just hit me across the face again. I then retaliated by hitting back. And then when we started to fist fight. I was taking brunt of the punches. His last punch knocked me out and I didn't wake up 'til early the next morning.
I went down stairs to find an ice pack for my cheeks cause they hurt like hell. As I entered the kitchen I came to face Spencer. We looked at each other for what seemed like eternity. "I'm leaving." Was all Spencer said before moving out of my
way. "What?" I said sleepily.
"I said that I was leaving." He spoke again this time he looked away.
I looked over at him a few tears welling up. "You mean your breaking up with me?"
Spencer looked back and then looked away. "...Yes." He walked past me the kitchen door closing behind him. I followed.
"Spence... please don't do this. I'm sorry I was just upset about our weekend being canceled." I said trying to delay the envitable. Spencer just frowned.
"Gerard I love you, but I've just got to get out and think about us. Then maybe I'll come back. But no promises." He said picking up his things by the door.
"You're already packed?" I asked confused. He smiled a little.
"Yea, I started this morning at 4:30. I thought I would be gone before you awoke." Tears fell from my eyes. I looked away not wanting to believe any of this.
"Could I atleast have this good-bye." Spencer smiled and walked over to me and kissed me. I wrapped my arms around him to try and keep him there for as long as I could.

: End of flashback:

Gerard took a sip of his drink as he watched his own brother drag Spencer to the dance floor. Spencer danced along to the fast beat of the music, like he had no care in the world. Gerard thought of confronting him, but how would he go about doing that. Getting up from his seat Gerard walked in the shadows towards the bar and asked for a refill on his drink. Turning around Gerard saw that Ryan and Frankie came up to dance along with Mikey and Spencer. Gerard stood there watching them dance to a few more songs before going back to their seats. Taking his drink from the bartender Gerard took a deep breath and walked over to where Spencer and their friends were sitting, stopping only a few feet away to weigh his options. Should he leave them alone or should he go up and talk to him. Deciding on the later, Gerard walked up to where Spencer had his back to him. Ray was the first to see Gerard walk up making everyone look and stop what they were doing to see who was there. Gerard felt a little exposed at that point, but pushed aside the feeling quickly. Spencer was the first to speak. "Gerard, what are you doing here?" Gerard looked at Spencer trying not to cry as a tear fell. "I've been here since 8:00 why do you ask?" Gerard replied looking over at his bandmates and nodded to them in greeting. Spencer looked over his shoulder at the guys then back Gerard. "Want to sit with us?" His hand waved over an unoccupied seat.
"I don't even know if you want to be around me." Gerard said looking at the floor.
"I don't mind at all." was all Spencer said before sitting down in his seat. "Well come on sit." He said again. Gerard sat down across from Ryan and looked over to Spencer not knowing what to say. Thankfully Ray spoke up. "So Gerard what were you doing over there in the dark corner." Okay bad idea. Gerard looked at Ray for what seemed like forever before saying. "What are you talking about Ray?" Frankie laughed. "What?" Gerard looked from Ray to Frankie.
"Dude we saw you over there when we came in." Frankie said with a bright smile.
"Were you watching me, Gerard?" Spencer asked as he made me turn to look at him. "I..." was all Gerard could say. Brendon and Ryan watched as Gerard blushed. "You were so watching him weren't you," asked Brendon. Gerard blushed even deeper. Mikey could see how badly Gerard was feeling. "Brendon just leave him alone, okay." Mikey stood up and walked over to his older brother. "Gerard we need to talk." Gerard looked up at his baby brother. "Now." Mikey said before leaving the group. Gerard looked over at Spencer then got up to follow his brother. Coming up to the bar Gerard found Mikey gathering drinks for everyone at the sitting area. "What do you need Michael." Gerard asked as he leaned against the bar. "It seemed like they were ganging up on you so I had to intervene." Mikey looked over at the group sitting around and talking. "Why are you really here Gerard?" Gerard looked at Mikey wondering how he was going to explain. "I'm just here for a few drinks Michael." Gerard looked down at his fingernails and dug under them to clean. "Gerard, what's the real reason." Mikey looked at Gerard, very serious about this. "I don't know how to explain it." Gerard said looking up at Mikey.
"Well it looks to me like your spying on Spencer." Mikey put his hand on Gerard's shoulder. "Gerard you need to get over him. If not for anyone, please do it for me I hate to see you like this." Gerard smiled at Mikey thanking him for the support. "Actually, I've been coming here to write music and I think I've got at least three songs done." Gerard said looking over at the group laughing at something Ray and Frankie were doing. " That's great Gerard do you have any with you?" Mikey asked as the bartender came back to give Mikey his orders and they walked back to the group as Frankie literally jump over the small table to attack Ray with tickles. Gerard smiled and shook his head at their antics. Mikey sat the plate of drinks down and sat in the seat next to Jon. "Hey Gerard, can I ask you a question?" Ray said as he pinned Frankie to the floor. "Sure, what?" Gerard asked looking at Frankie wiggle under Ray.

Ray looked up at Gerard with a serious look in his eyes. "Where have you been these last few weeks?" Frankie stopped wiggling and looked up at Gerard as well as the other two band members. Gerard looked at Ray then the rest of his bandmates. "What do you mean exactly?"
Mikey spoke up. "Well you haven't returned any of our calls and we don't know where it is that you're staying. It's like you disappeared off the face of the earth." Gerard looked over at Mikey. "I'm fine guys I've been stay near here that's why I've been here so often." Gerard looked over at Spencer for a brief moment then looked over at Ray. "Dude you need to get back in the studio with us if we're to finish this album." Frankie said from the floor.

Gerard smiled. "I will soon Frankie." Gerard looked over at Spencer only to see that Spencer was watching him. "What?" Spencer smiled and blushed. "Nothing." Gerard smiled back. "So how have you been Gerard?" Spencer finally said. Gerard looked at Spencer speechless. "Um...I've been okay I guess. Why do you ask?"
Spencer looked away for a second then looked back at Gerard. "It's just that I miss you and I want you back Gerard." Gerard looked stunned at what Spencer had said. Looking around at the rest of the guys sitting with them Gerard saw the look of astonishment on all of their faces. Thinking back to all the promises that Spencer broke and only having time for a quick lay; as Spencer would put it, Gerard knew he wanted this; to be with Spencer again and have his life back in order. But he knew all to well that if he did take Spencer back his heart would be broken again. No, he just couldn't deal with that heartache again. "Spencer I...I just don't know what to say I...I love you...but..." Gerard knew he was hurting Spencer but he had to do this he had to move on. "I'm sorry Spencer." Gerard got up and looked over at his band. "Call me tomorrow Ray." Gerard turned around and started walking away.
"What time?" Ray asked. Gerard stopped and turned to face both groups.
"Seven am" will be fine."
"Why so early?" Bob asked
Gerard smiled. "I just thought of a new song. We start practice tomorrow at eight am sharp." Gerard walked out after that as all of them watched him leave. One in particular had tears run down his face.

The End