Categories > Celebrities > Fall Out Boy > My Time Will Come....(Won't It?)

Tearing Through Me.

by XXPoeticTragedyXX 6 reviews

"I'm not ignoring you!" Patrick hissed, defensively. "It's not my fault you're boring. That I have a life and things to think about."

Category: Fall Out Boy - Rating: R - Genres: Angst,Drama,Romance - Published: 2007-07-27 - Updated: 2010-08-01 - 2792 words

2Exciting
[12:17 am] [The parking lot, outside Troi’s apartment]

His heart raced as he neared her, the world around him softly disappearing, leaving only her body, her shape in his view. No words were spoken as they stepped to one another, hearts pounding. His from lust, hers from excitement.

They're hands wrapped into each other's as heir bodies collided; they're lips eliminating any space between them. His hands ran up her sides and to the small of her back; pulling her closer. In his mind, they had been apart far too long. He waited and waited and he wanted her now more than ever.

She let her hands silkily run along his shoulders, caressing them, and working into them. Then she clasped them behind his neck, pressing her breasts into his chest.

His tongue ran alone her bottom lip, begging to explore her mouth and she opened it obediently, their lips moving in synchronization.

His lips curved just a little as she pressed herself into him, and let out a soft moan. He needed her, he wanted her, he had her, and he wasn't letting her go anywhere.

He'd already lost this game once and this time he would play it right and win.

She pulled back, enough to gasp in some air, then reconnected their lips, taking his taste selfishly. Setting him up high enough so when he fell, he wouldn't get back up. This had to be precise; well played, or else everything would end up in shattered pieces before her. She was not okay with losing. With being second best. It was her being happy, or no one being happy.

She pushed on Patrick's chest lightly, signaling for him to pull away and stop.

He did, taking his time, letting his tongue run along her lips one last time before, taking his hands under her chin gently, and searching her face.

"No one knows right?" She whispered, weaving her spell around him tightly.

He shook his head softly; reassuringly. "Of course not, they wouldn't be okay with it. But their opinions don't matter; only you do."

"That's what I wanted to hear." She whispered in his ear; her breath warm on it, making his little hairs stand.

"No one can know about us meeting, you know that right?" She reminded him, rubbing his chest lovingly. "Your friends don't like me."

Patrick nodded sadly. "I know sweetie, and I'm sorry. They just don't know you like I do. They don't love you like I do."

She fabricated a smile just for him, and took his hands. "Patrick? I'm the only thing in your life that matters right?"

He nodded dreamily, moving for her lips again; her scent driving him wild.

She resisted, pushing against his chest lightly. "Do you have the money? It's important that I have it soon, otherwise we can't be together."

"Baby, everything is taken care of, I promise. I want you to be happy, and I'll do whatever I have to, to make you so."

"You're such a sweetheart." She cooed, letting her tongue run against his lips teasingly. "I love you."

Patrick sighed in content, and hugged her to him, his eyes closed in happiness.
"I love you too, Cindee. I just want us to be together."

**
[3 weeks later.]

"Patrick?"

Troian poked Patrick in the ribs from across the table, as he gazed into space. A troubled look took over his face, as he sighed in frustration.

"Patrick?" She asked again, giving him a look. She had been trying to get his attention for the past 30 minutes. Every time she said something, he just nodded or mumbled something intangible. What was his deal?

She took a sip of her Grande Mocha Frap. "Hey do you want to fly to the moon with me to pick up some cheese?" She said, looking at him in mock seriousness. Patrick nodded before he pushed her hand away, and began to fiddle with his phone.

"Patrick!" She yelled, now annoyed. Seriously, what was his problem? They boy acted like he had no proper mind. She pushed him, then shot him a glare. Why the hell did he agree to come get coffee with her if he was going to ignore her?
He had been acting so distant lately. He never talked to her. He never responded to her questions, or cracked jokes only she could understand. He never even spoke to her.

"What?" Patrick snapped, wrenching himself out of his daydream about Cindee.

"God! What? What do you want?"

Troian scowled at him. "What do you think Patrick? I invited you to come out here with me because I thought you were gonna talk to me. You didn't have to come if you didn't want to."

"I'm here, aren't I?" He retorted, shoving his phone into his hoodie pocket, before glaring at her.

"No!" She cried, slamming her cup down. Thank God, the cafe was empty.
"You're not here! Your off in own world ignoring me!"

Yelling at Patrick was not exactly what she had in mind when she invited him to come along. If anything she still had pathetic hopes of him one day thinking of her as more than a friend. But mainly, she had meant this outing to bring them close again. So they could talk, and stop being so distant. She missed her best friend.

She sat back in chair, hurt that he was acting like a jerk.

"I'm not ignoring you!" Patrick hissed, defensively. "It's not my fault you're boring. That I have a life and things to think about." He wasn't even being himself anymore. It was someone else yelling at the sweet girl before him. It was Cindee's words spawning from his mouth like poison.

Troian blinked in surprise at his words, then looked down in regret.

Regret and pain. They go hand in hand, don't they?

Patrick shut his mouth, as soon as the words left his lips. What had he done?
He hadn't meant any of that.

"Troi...Troi, I-I'm sorry. You know I didn't mean any of that."

She did her best to glare at Patrick before standing up. "I think you did."

"No!" Patrick cried, standing up. "I swear; I was just pissed!"

"Right," Troian nodded, "And Why were you pissed, Patrick? Because you came out here with me?"

"No Troi! Just let me explain, I-this has nothing to do with you....I mean..."

Patrick fell silent, racking his brain for a plausible excuse for his actions. Nothing.

He hung his head in shame, and Troian wordless pushed past him, heading out the cafe. That's what I thought.

Asshole.

Why did I even ask him to come?
I know he'll never think of me that way, yet I keep trying. What an idiot.


Troian let the door slam shut as she left him there. She turned down the sidewalk and headed in the direction of the park. She was so hurt, how could he say that to her? How could he treat her like she was useless? Like all she was good for was to listen to his problems but as soon as she wanted to express herself she was shoved aside.

How could he use her?

She didn't want to admit it, but she knew all her thoughts were right.
For the past three weeks Patrick had been treating her like crap. Every time he needed a friend to talk to, she was there. Every time he told her he missed Cindee, she was there. But come the time she wanted someone to talk to; he was too busy. He was tired. He was out.

She took a seat at a bench, by a set of swings and sighed. Was he using her? Or was he just being a guy?

Patrick had never been such a jerk in the time that she had known him. All of a sudden she was sure he had changed.

*

Patrick didn't go after her immediately. Instead he hung, contemplating what he had done. He sat in the chair, with his hands at his temple, trying to decide what to do. What had come over him? Troian was never a boring person. If anything, she was the most interesting person he knew. She was always there for him, and he was lashing out at her in return.

Smart Stump.

She had been there every time he longed for Cindee. She never once complained. She was amazing. And now that he was meeting up with Cindee, he was having trouble keeping it to himself. He wasn't entirely sure why Cindee didn't want anyone to know about them. Why she just wouldn't fully be with him. The only reason he could come up with, was that Cindee knew his friends hated her and she wanted to take it slow.

And they did hate her. Oh, man...yes they did.

The moment Pete and Katie knew they immediately went off on him; giving him looks like "I told you so." And telling him he was better of without her, and that's he was worthless. But you no Patrick....a sucker for a sweet apology and for her touch.

Cindee insisted they stay 'friends.' She said she still loved him, but they couldn't be together.

Anytime he tried to be more than a little affectionate with her, she pushed him away. Acted like they weren't together. It was pissing Patrick off, but he kept shoving the problem aside. He should be happy. He was back with the woman he loved. Kinda.

One of the servers; aged but wise, noticed him. He finished wiping down the counters before making his way to Patrick, the towel now slug over his shoulder.

"You should apologize." He told Patrick speaking softly.

Patrick jumped at the sudden appearance of the voice, and turned to the old man. "I don't even know why I yelled at her. She's my best friend, and I just snapped."

Wait, why was he pouring his problems out to this man. He didn't even know him.

The bartended nodded as if reading Patrick's mind, and took a seat in a nearby stool. "The first thing is always to apologize. Then asked for forgiveness. Then buy her some flowers or something. Ladies like that." The old man chuckled, and nodded to himself; knowing he'd done his fare share of apologies when he was Patrick's age.

Patrick rubbed his temple, and stared at his coffee cup. "What if she doesn't forgive me?" He mumbled, looking at the old man.

"She will. She's your best friend."

Patrick nodded at the old man, a small smile quirking his lips. The man was right. Troian wasn't an obnoxious person. She would come around, she always did.

"Your right..." He told the old man, standing up.
He turned quickly, with his new confidence and started for the door. He stopped before leaving, and turned. "Thanks!" He called to the old man, who was already wiping down tables. The man nodded, and went back to wiping table.

Patrick sprinted into the darkness of the night, heading for the park. He knew she would be there.
*
She was. She was there sitting on a bench, her knees brought up to her chest; hugging them. He walked slowly, trying to decide what to say.

He could see her face, twisted into a hurt expression; but not crying.

He tiptoed up to her, and stopped right in front of her. "Hey," he said softly.

She looked at him, and glared before looking back down at her knees.

Patrick took a seat next to her, rubbing the back of his neck. "Listen...Troi... I'm so sorry. I honestly didn't mean anything that I said...I just...I'm in so deep right now and I have all these things on my mind and I don't know what to do. I'm sorry."

"So you take it out on me? So you ignore your best friend?" She hissed, shooting him a scowl.

"Your right. I shouldn't have. I really am sorry....."

She shrugged at him to let him know she was listening but not forgiving him.

He put a hand her arm, and turned her so that she put her feet on the ground and turned to him. "Please forgive me. You know I what never do something to hurt you."

Troian couldn't stay mad at him. Damnit, how did he do that? She sighed, and looked up at him.

"Please?" Patrick pleaded, pouting. "I'll make it up to you some how."

She did her best to stay angry, but gave up. Just plain impossible.

"You know you love me." He teased, pulling her into a hug.

She cracked a smile, and rolled her eyes. "Fine, just a little." She gave in, and hugged him back.

"Why are you so distant, you know you can talk to me."

Patrick stiffened in her arms, and let out a sigh. "I....It's Cindee." He confessed.

Troian stared at him incredulously. "I thought you broke up with her."

Patrick nodded. "I did. But I've been meeting up with her...and talking. I still love her, you know that. And I want her back. But...it's like she doesn't care."

Troian bit her lip at this, her face falling. "Oh..." She said to softly he couldn't hear her.

"I can't eat. I can't sleep. Troian I fucking think about her 24/7." He told her, his voice desperate. "That guy, he doesn't love her like I do. She's everything to me, but she can't seem to see that. I need her. I love her."

Troi's heart cracked with each of his voice. Was he trying to kill her?

She wanted to scream. To tear open heart, get down on her knees, and let it bleed. She wanted to shake Patrick, and yell "Look! Look at me! I'm here and I care, I always have! Please just give me a chance! Love /Me/!"

Because she was hurting so much, so deep inside. There was a physical pain in her heart and in her lungs from where she couldn't breathe. Because every word he spoke was like he was reading her mind, every word could have been written by her alone. Because no one knew how bad Patrick felt as much as she did. Because she was sitting here next to him ready to explode. Ready to die, ready to just give up. She was there, just waiting for him to notice she was still undeniably in love him with.

I wish I was as invisible as you make me feel.

"Patrick?" Her voice was soft, breaking as she leaned into him.

"Yeah?"

"Listen...I know how you feel. I'm sorry."

Patrick snorted in annoyance. "No you don't, trust me you never will."

At that point that Troian was head over heel past love. She wanted nothing more that to take Patrick in her arms and kiss him.

And she did.

She pulled him to her, pressing him into her chest. Slanting her mouth across his as he gasped. Kissing him with such a hunger it rocked them both. For that split second, it was bliss. Note the word Split. So fast it was there and gone.

Then he stiffened under her touch and pulled away. Slash that, pushed her away.

His hands found her arms and pushed without being gentle.

"What the fuck are you doing? Are you out of your mind?" He gasped, jumping off the bench. He wiped his mouth with the back of his hand and glared at her in disbelief.

"Are you out of your mind? That's practically classes as rape!" Patrick said, raising his voice, "What kind of sick stunt are you trying to pull? What are you trying to do to me?"

Troian watched in shock; her mouth slightly open, speechless.

"I-I'm sorry! I didn't..."

He fixed his hat angrily and moved farther away from, his face red.

"Ugh! I'll bet you didn't even listen to a word I said!" He accused.

Troian's jaw dropped even lower. "No, I did! I-"

"Some friend!" He cut her off, glaring. "You know I love her! Fucking Teenie!"

Troian closed her eyes at his cruel words and pressed her lips together to keep from crying.

Nice try, no luck.

Her eyes filled with tears and she stood up. He stepped back and she sobbed as he retreated from her like poison. Then she ran past him into the darkness, not caring where she was going. Not caring that it was snowing like Hell.

Nothing mattered anymore.
*
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