All he wants to do is keep going. But we always end up stopping.
The small silver car goes zooming through another traffic light.
He has to get out of this town.
He has to get out of this state.
He has to get away from him.
He turns the wheel quickly, hearing his tires squeal on the pavement and the impatient honk of a car that he has cut off.
Anyone watching this scene is looking to see what is chasing the young man.
But the only thing he is running from is himself.
All right, all right, slow down.
The words never seemed more useful than in this moment.
Don’t act so rashly.
Take a breath.
Push the brake.
Everything’s open to interpretation, he thinks, as the car whizzes through another traffic light.
He doesn’t have time to wait.
Why should he be here any longer?
Fear. Anxiety. Trapped.
The car slows and stops.
Just a few seconds, he consoles, just a few seconds and you’ll be gone again.
And then…the slightest movement.
He throws open his door, making sure that his emergency lights are working properly.
Whoever the bastard that just rear-ended him is, he’s going to get it.
He walks to the back of the car, watches as the driver of the other vehicle opens his door and steps out.
And more than anything, he wants to run.
He doesn’t need the car anymore.
He’s in good enough shape.
He’s willing to do anything but stand here and face him.
“Please don’t go.”
He looks up at the figure standing in front of him. He wants to scream that his pants are too tight and that scarf is by far the dumbest thing he’s ever seen.
“Don’t do this.”
“Oh I’m sorry, I wasn’t aware that you were pouring your heart out to me, that I was humiliating you.”
“I came to talk to you.”
“We’ve already talked today.”
He stares at the boy across from him so much that he has to look away for fear that he’s going to burn a hole right through him. He’s always had silly little fears like that, and the fact that his counterpart’s body is so menacingly thin only makes him more worried.
“I know, but I said some things I didn’t mean.”
“Oh, I think you meant what you said.”
“If I meant it, do you think I would have followed you and hit your fucking car to get your attention?”
He looks at his bumper, which, from this angle, seems to be attached to the other’s car, but he’s sure there’s going to be no damage.
“You did this on purpose?”
“You’re not the only one who does stupid things for love.”
He smiles in spite of himself. Did that boy just say love? He tries to keep calm.
“Yeah, but I don’t damage property to get my point across.”
The other boy moves closer. Their hands brush.
“I’m not so sure about that. I’d never felt my heart hurt so much as when you walked out the door.”
“What you said killed me, Ryan. I told you I loved you, and you said you couldn’t. What did you expect me to do?”
“Wait. I want you to wait for me.”
That’s the last thing he wants to do. He’s tired of waiting.
He can’t help but smile as he takes the smaller boy by surprise, making him gasp as his plush pink lips capture the thinner, chapped ones. Their lips move and part like the tide brushing the shore, then moving back out toward the ocean.
His tongue glides across Ryan’s lips, waiting, just like he was instructed to. But it seems that the other boy is the one who’s tired of waiting. He opens his mouth eagerly, and the two of them don’t say anything for what seems like forever.
He grabs Ryan’s hips, tugging him closer and groaning when they brush each other lightly.
Ryan puts a hand behind his head, pulling him closer, achieving more access to his ready and willing mouth.
They don’t hear a sound.
The drivers asking if they need any help.
The taxis honking for them to get out of the middle of the road.
The quiet “aww”s from a small group of teenage girls on the sidewalk.
Ryan hears nothing but his quiet sighs.
He hears nothing but Ryan’s pleased little moans.
When they break apart, Ryan only has one thing to say through his grin.
“I love you too, Brendon.”