Every girls' wish...
By: sayDIE/rie'ma/Drareg Rie'ma
***"Sadie, please don't go… I want you here…" he said, with tears in his eyes, as he reached for her hand.
"I'm sorry, Gee, I have to go…" she said, crying, too, as she took her bag from the floor. "This isn't working, Gerard. We are not working."
"Tell me what's wrong baby, and I'm gonna make it work," Gerard pleaded as he stood up and grabbed her hands.
"Everything, Gerard! We're too different from each other! This is a disaster, a big mistake! We're not meant for each other, Gerard, everything between us is a big mistake and nothing but a disaster!" she yelled. The tears continued to fall from her eyes uncontrollably.
"Please, baby, don't leave me. I'm gonna be a better man, the best man you've ever wished for. Just don't leave me…" he pleaded again and hugged her.
She couldn't bear to see him like that. She couldn't bear to see him cry. She loved him so much she would sacrifice anything and everything for him. She didn't ant any other man, she wanted him. "Okay, I won't leave. Just don't cry," she finally said.
"Thank you, babe. I promise I will be a better man. I will be the best for you, I will do anything for you," he said as he pressed his forehead against hers. "I love you, till death and beyond that. Sadie…"And then they met in a wonderful kiss…***
I saved my work and opened FicWad, to publish it. I've been making fan fictions and stories for about two or three years now, mostly about me and my crushes, and My Chemical Romance, my favorite band. My latest is entitled "Till Death And Beyond That", a story about Gerard and a girl named Sadie. I'm making the 14th chapter now and so far many are reading it and leaving reviews. And they say they love it, that's why I'm continuing to do it.
I'm totally, crazily, hooked to Gerard Way. I daydream about him, I think about him all the time, his face is my wallpaper, I record his voice and listen to it repeatedly. I'm crazy, I tell you. Everyday I pretend I'm sleeping beside him, that I'm talking to him, and I use my own cell phone to send myself sweet messages from "him". I label him mine, I cried when he got engaged, I hated Eliza Cuts, I cried and went crazy when he got married, I despised Lyn-Z, I cursed every girl he went out with.
When my friends insult him, I yell and defend him. They laugh at me when I do that and they think I'm crazy. But hey, it's all right to defend someone you're really into, right?
My family get mad when I buy his cd's, when I dress up like how he does, when I sing along to his songs, when I cry everytime I couldn't go to his shows, when I waste all my money to get a ticket for his shows. They say I'm too young to listen to him cuss out. Thirteen is not young, I always protest. But they say it's the same. And they laugh at me when I say there's a future for Gerard and me. But hey, it's free to dream and hope, right?
Okay, I know what you're thinking: "This girl's crazy!" But I'm just one of the million crazy girls who dream of being with him. Whose heart deflated when the news about Gerard and Lyn-Z's wedding was heard.
I remember when I learned he was married, I fell from my chair. Honest. I cried and I was depressed. Yeah I was crazy. I loathed Lyn-Z so much and I insulted her. How could he go out with a tattooed girl who looks like shit? That was the question that kept going through my head as I thought about him. I was fucked up, but no one noticed, no one cared. And I loved it that way. I always love it when I'm left alone.
Okay, so maybe you're wondering where is this really getting into… honestly, this isn't going anywhere else. This is a story, yes, but not a happy ending, if truth be told. This is not like those other stories where Gerard meets someone and falls in love with a lucky fan. Cuz we never met at all, and maybe we never will.
But I'm asking all of you… is it a sin to dream about him? I honestly don't think it is! It isn't a sin to dream about him, to talk to him, to pretend he's beside me, to walk with him till morning, to feel his arms around me, to see him and me forever and forever together, to think there's still a way for us… to continue hoping and wishing there's still a future for us, to wake up each morning telling myself how much I love him, to go to school and everywhere and wish he was with me…
… to wake up after a beautiful dream about him and realize that he can never be mine cuz he already belongs to someone else…
And you know what's the hardest part of dreaming about him? To learn everyday that all my life, I've only been pretending. I talk to him, when I only talk to myself. I'm with him when I'm alone. I'm hearing him saying he loves me when I tell myself how much I love him.
I'm talking about Gerard Way, dudes. About loving him… on my own. Without him knowing, without him noticing. This is a love story that never happened. A love story that has no happy ending, and maybe never will have a happy ending. A completely pointless story, I believe?
But then you know, every night when I think there's a way for us, I feel happy. It's not a sin to love and hope as long as you know your limits…
But do I know mine?
I maybe a little crazy. Well that's it. We all go a little crazy when it comes to love. Even if we fall in love with someone who's not like Gerard Way. We pretend, we hopelessly wish, we sleep to dream, we endlessly love…
And wake up to make ourselves realize that he will never love us back. And cry again, just like what I am doing now.
Author's Notes: Completely fictional, the Gerard Way addiction was exaggerated. Reviews are welcome!!! One-shot. Happy Halloween!