The first Quidditch game is played, and both Harry and Ron make errors of judgement
- Hell yeah!
(i wonder how many reviews i've started that way?)
I like the Faithful, and i really like the transformation that's about to shake up the British Wizarding culture. This way of making Harry the alleged Heir might be a tad more strained than i would have expected from you, but the execution of the growing suspicions were masterful. If you can't beat him, join him, sort of thing instead of picking fights with the guy who might wield a bloody big stick. Smarter than Canon, certainly. Ah well, let's go forth and shake the purebloods of the piedestals. I look forward to see the differences between us.
- This wasn't a bad chapter. I'm glad you kept the quidditch short, I sick of reading about the games because they always end up the same.
It seemed a little on the short side though. And if both Luna and Harry know about Ginny's aura problem, why hasn't Harry mentioned it to his mentors?
- Well, it looks like Malfoy ain't as good a flyer as he thought. Too bad. Luckily Snape kept Lockheart from giving him a flail-chest.
Harry should have mentioned Luna's suspicios. One of the brotherhood might have been able to 'read' Ginny.
Harry also should have told Dumbleore the brotherhood thought the creature was a Basilisk. No one told him not too, and so, it would have added a layer of protection...or maybe not.
Unntil next time... Alorkin
Author's responseYes, Harry should have told, but it should not be surprising that he didn't, any more than he confided in Dumbledore in canon that year. Luna told him ginny MIGHT be having an unidentified problem. Harry says let me know if things get worse. Two days later, the Weasley boys assure Harry that if there is a real problem, Ginny will let them know in her own good time. The errors mentioned in the chapter description.
And why would this Harry, who's had what? 3 or 4 conversations with a man he now considers a manipulating old fart, give Dumbledore information Harry would assume the Brothers would share if it was necessary?
(#) PerfesserN 2007-12-28 12:32:46 PMAs Harry Re-do stories go this is very good, of course. There is the continuity (either that or Harry really is Fate's bitch), but also enough changes to rule out speculation for the future of this particular Harry and Co.
Write on, write on!
- Thanks for the chapter Dr T! I enjoyed the scene between Harry and Brother Cobra...... the members who saw his open affection for Harry must have wondered what universe they'd entered! Hmmm, it looks as though Luna's suggestion about Harry and protecting other students is starting to go into effect. Will Dumbles notice and assume that this resembles Voldie and his minions? After all, he's already assumed that Harry is being influnced by groups that he considers "dark". Of course each group has their own agenda, and Harry would make an excellent poster boy for any and all of them. I had the impression that Dumbles is trying to "lead" Harry back into the light. Sigh. I'm glad that Luna, Harry, and Hermione are becoming better friends. Will Harry mention Luna's gift to the Brotherhood at some point or will they notice it themselves? She did mention to Harry the lack of instruction she'd found in Hogwarts so far, and they have access to information that she doesn't. As for the situation with Ginny.....yep, that's going to cost them. By the way, did Snape feel a bit relieved, tension wise after hexing Lockhart? Why, he hasn't been able to bully his favorite targets and he's had to behave like a proper teacher for the first time....he's probably suffering from indegestion....which serves him right! In short, thanks again for writing such great stories, and I look forward to the future installments!
Author's responseYes, Lockhart doesn't play much of a riole here, so Severus might as well releave some tension!
- Now that was an interesting twist on things, with Malfoy getting the "Lockhart treatment" rather than Harry; the game was described well enough to be appreciated without bogging things down. I do like how Luna, sorted into Gryffindor, is blooming, esp. with Hermione's developing friendship, rather than what happened to her in Ravenclaw. I do think Harry should've mentioned her abilities and observations to the Brothers, but, heh, he's not -that- old or experienced, yet, and he'll make mistakes, though this one, compounded by the reassurances of the Brothers Weasley, may turn around and bite him, and others, badly. I have to wonder if Ginny will survive this time.
Given the poor opinion Snape has of Lockhart and the stress of having to behave as a teacher, I'll agree that hexing him had to be rather cathartic for the Bat.
Author's responseOne of the two snags I've hit so far is deciding on what to do with Ginny. Well, you'll know by chapter 12!
(#) whatareyouevensaying 2007-12-28 10:11:54 PMVery interesting. It seems that no matter who gets petrified, Harry can't avoid arousing suspicion from his less-than-brilliant peers. He seems to have a lot of those, doesn't he?
Looking forward to more, hopefully in future chapters you'll continue to marginalize Lockhart.
Author's responseThe stupidity of the Hogwarts students and staff seemed to go up in each volume of canon, didn't it?
(#) Meteoricshipyards 2007-12-31 12:53:27 PMLiked the Druids trying to convert Harry. As Pratchett said, it's hard to be an atheist when the gods throw rocks through your windows; conversely, it would be hard for Harry to be a believer when he knows several former gods.
But it was an enjoyable chapter. The differences are interesting. I'm surprised none of the people meeting Harry at the end asked for protection; maybe they hadn't heard about it, yet.
(Did I forget something? Is Luna under his protection as well as Hermione?)
Thanks for the story.
Author's responseNo, since Luna has magical parents, she would be under which ever was the senior family.
- One of the two snags I've hit so far is deciding on what to do with Ginny.
My own thought would be for Harry to rescue her (he -is- a Hero, after all ;)), but for Tom to have leeched off her to such a degree that her magic/core is temporarily (or permanently, if you're really feeling mean) inhibited to where she's not much more, if any, than a squib and she won't be returning to Hogwarts for a while, if ever. The side effects of this with Ron could quite possibly drive a further wedge between him and Harry, likely much to his loss.
just my $0.02.
- A nice little chat with Luna. It's reassuring, and satisfying, to be reminded that Harry's a good guy - he's more the hero in your stories than in Rowling's work - and that Luna is both safe and appreciated.
Heh, the idea of the two girls 'merely [hugging] each other and [holding] on' is quite funny, as well as demonstrating the strength of their friendship with Harry.