Categories > Books > Harry Potter > the rage and pain within

the rage

by gadgetkerneen 2 reviews

pain

Category: Harry Potter - Rating: R - Genres: Angst - Characters: Harry - Published: 2008-02-29 - Updated: 2008-02-29 - 3968 words

-1TrainWreck
Dumbledore was slowly walking down the hall from Harry's room when he heard hushed angered voices, "When those freaks leave that boy is going to get what’s coming to him, I will not be made a fool in my own house. I told you we should have left him at an orphanage when he was first forced upon us. Yes I know we needed the money then and it’s very helpful now, but we could have left him with a different name and those freaks never even checked in on the bastard, he could have died and none would be the wiser"

He was appalled, he had always thought that Harry was exaggerating when he said that his relatives were mean to him, how could he have been so blind. Dumbledore knew that Harry only lied to spare others heart ache, he sighed knowing that he should of had Harry’s order guards check in on him and observe the Dursley’s to be sure that his great great great grandson was safe not just from the Death Eaters but from anyone that would do him harm. He had failed his family once again first he lost his wife in the fight with Grindwald, then with James and Lilly not believing them safe at where ever James said that they would be, and now with the last living relative. "Lilly my darling I'm sorry, I thought him safer with your half-sister instead of me." he said in a soft whisper, "I thought that being with them he would be safe from wizard kind, nothing that would warn me of the abuse that he would receive came to mind. I did not even listen to Minerva, James’s great grand mother, when she said that these people were the worst sort of muggles that one could find, I thought that she just wanted him to live with her." As he spoke, his voice grew heavy, laden with sorrow, regret, and remorse. "Harry, my grandson, I'm sorry for everything that they have done to you. I thought that they would be the best for you, please forgive me."

*********************************

Harry was walking to the living room, he had enough, and he wanted to obtain his revenge upon those that made his life hell for fifteen long years. Quietly he stepped forward, Harry could see Dumbledore listening in on the Dursley’s scheming about something, 'Probably my punishments for them being hear, and if they try it I'll just ante up with the Twins stuff.'

"Harry, my grandson, I'm sorry for everything that they have done to you. I thought that they would be the best for you, please forgive me."

Harry heard what Dumbledore said and started to contemplate what he had over-heard 'what’s he mean Grandson, Sirius said that dad lived with his grandparents because his mum and dad had died. How in the bloody hell could be my grandfather, my mother was muggle born? Had he finally seen reason and realized that he was wrong?'

Angrily Harry said, "Why do you deserve forgiveness, all of this could have been avoided if you would have listened to others. But no only you know what is best, I'm not your damn mushroom. Why do you feel the need to rule over the lives of others, is that how you get your kicks!" Harry's rage was building, as he coldly lashed out at his headmaster with his words. As he spoke, Harry's canine teeth were enlarging, as were his fingernails, and his body started to grow, as did the mass of his muscles. Harry now stood eye to eye with the aged man before him at an astonishing seven feet; his sheer bulk intimidating the Dursley’s that heard someone talking in the hallway. A grimacing sneer was evident on his face as he continued, "For years I thought that they were right in doing everything that had happened to me. Everyone was against me and no one cared, if you had really thought that this place was the best for me why did you not have someone check in on me?" With the venom in Harry’s voice cutting him deeply, Dumbledore started to shrink away from the youth before him, he knew form the episode in his office after the fiasco at the ministry that Harry’s anger was not something to trifle with. Miss Granger had tried to warn him that Harry might act strange this summer and not to ignore him least he do something drastic, why did he think as Harry so bluntly put it 'think that he knew best.'

"Harry I know that I have no right to ask for your forgiveness but please I beg of you listen to me," Dumbledore started, he knew that, like Molly, if Harry was not diverted all hell would break loose; “this is neither the time nor the place for your anger. Toms anger and resentment is what led him down the path he now travels. Uncontrolled anger leads to hate, hate allows the darkness within each of us to grow until all that we desire is to bring harm to others. Don't stoop to his level, overcome the cause for this, and fight against the blackness that has taken root inside of your heart because of the Dursley’s."

Harry contemplated Dumbledore’s words, 'He is right, I don’t want to be like Voldemort. I have been so angry for such a long time, it has always been just below the surface and since the beginning of my fifth year, and it has been ready to explode at any disturbance. But now, now it has boiled over causing a mess in my life and if it will help I will do as he asks.'

Dumbledore gave a visible sigh of relief as he could see Harry's shoulders relax, his size shrink back down to his original height, and release the magical pressure that he unknowingly accumulated. "Harry," he started, “what do you want me to do to correct this situation, just please remember even if they hurt you, you don't need to hurt them back. That is the difference between good people and bad. Bad people are the ones who have been hurt and then hurt others because of it, where as good people are the ones who are hurt, but try to protect others.”

Harry thought about this, ‘What do I want from Dumbledore, what would make me happy. Retribution upon the Dursley’s, justice sounds so appealing. However, when they are gone then what? Who do I want with me? Who, where did who come from I …’ As he was thinking faces started to float by in the front of his mind. Herrmione, no she is with Ron. Ginny, I cant she is Ron’s little sister I cant can I? She is not so little any more you know and besides she likes you for you. No Herrmione said that she got tired of waiting on me and gave up and besides she is probably dating someone else. You do not know that for sure, and besides true love never really goes away. You can have her; all you have to do is summon your Gryffindor courage and tell her how you feel. Fine, fine you win.’

“Professor, I would like Ginny to be able to visit and Herrmione if she would like to come as well.” Harry said with a slight blush, but continued with a grin filled with so much malevolence that it sent a chill down the spines of all that were looking upon his face, “But a settling of scores is in order, would you not agree? ‘After all do on to others as they would do on to you’ correct. No worries, I refuse to allow my hands to be stained with sins like theirs, I will leave that to you while I wait in my room.” After saying his peace, Harry turned and headed back to his room with a warm smile and a curt nod toward Remus.

Dumbledore looked to Remus with a shadow of fear in his eyes, “ I will take them and notify the proper authorities, will you please go and fetch Miss Weasley and Miss Granger if she is there.” And with that, Dumbledore strode over toward his new captives and left with a pop, Remus did the same.

*******************************

Ginny was in her room trying to figure out what to wear today, “Well It’s not like I will be going anywhere today, why should I even bother?” Ginny heard a knock at the front door, a special knock that is only used by Order members. So she just threw something on and went downstairs, and opened the door. There on the walkway stood Remus looking at her with a smile.

“Ah, just the person that I was looking for, may I come in?” he said. And as she stepped out of the way he walked in. “Ginny is Herrmione around?” he looked at her questioning, and after receiving a shake from her he continued, “To bad, by the way is that what you are planning to wear today?” “Yes, but why do you ask?” she said looking at his mischievous grin. “Oh nothing,” he said slowly walking away from her “Harry just asked to see you if your willing to come over and Dumbledore asked me to bring you. So,” he started offering his hand, “if you are ready grab hold and lets go.” Ginny looked at Remus disbelievingly, Harry Potter wanted to see her, Ginny Weasley, a short knobby kneed, skinny girl. She could not but help asking herself why? “Remus why does he want to see me? I’m just a girl what does he want with me?” Remus responded mysteriously “Oh I don’t know why he would want to speak with you, I mean when he asked he was blushing and the fact that you are a girl has absolutely nothing to do with it I’m sure.” He finished sarcastically, flashing the Marauders smile something he had not been able to do for a while now. With a shrill squeal, Ginny ran back upstairs and into her room as fast as she could. “Okay,” she started, “there is still hope for us, and even if there is not an us I will do what ever it takes to make him happy.” With that solemn vow, Ginny got ready to be with Harry with fervor. Five minutes later, she was standing at Harry’s place with a pop that signaled an apparition, and knocked on the back door.


Harry was pacing in his room wondering if he went to far in asking if Ginny and Herrmione could come over, “Oh what if they don’t want to come, what will I do? I know I will just play it off as a misunderstanding, but what do if one of them does come or both! I … I’ll just tell them the truth Ginny Herrmione I love …” Pop. Harry ran down stairs knowing that sound, when he reached the kitchen he heard a soft knocking from the back door. “I wonder who …” Ginny’s face suddenly appeared in his mind and somehow knew that it was her. Harry ran to the back door, yanked it open, and after seeing that it truly was Ginny grabbed her into a fierce hug.

“You came, thanks Gin.” Harry said. “Can we go to my room we need to talk, it’s very important for us.” Motioning for her to follow, he led the way. Ginny was starting to fret, ‘He said we need to talk, oh no this can’t be good. But what about that hug, that was no friend hug so maybe there is hope. Do I tell him that I still like him? Only if he says something. Alright that is what I will do.’

Harry was nervous, he knew what he was going to do but the thought of doing so made him blush. When they reached his room Harry beckoned her inside and to sit on the bed. He watched her as she sat down taking in her beauty she was wearing a pair of denim low rider jeans, a plain white t shirt, and what is that a… a thong. Oh yea. "Gin, I have started to open up my heart and I want to allow a few people in. The problem is, I have been hurt before and so, I'm afraid to let them in. Gin I'm ready to admit that I fancy Ginevra Molly Weasley, so what do you think of this possible relationship?"

Ginny was very self conscious about her appearance while under Harry's gaze, but when she could see that his eyes lit up when they landed upon her backside. The thought that he may be interested helped to strengthen her resolve, Ginny steeled herself for the worst because she had been hurt before and did not want to have her hopes to rise only to come crashing down. Don’t worry this is Harry and besides remember what Remus said, 'Harry specifically asked for you and another, and when he did this he was blushing like Ron' Ginny liked to listen to this inner voice, not only did it give very good advice but it sounded so much like Sirius, and with that she sat next to Harry. She was listening intently to what he was saying but she felt downhearted, 'He is talking about liking someone right in front of me, doesn't he know how I feel about him? Who is this Ginny, does she know how lucky she is, I wonder what she is like? What did he say her last name was Willo, Winselo, Weasley? Did he say Weasley, he did he said Ginevra Molly Weasley!' "Oh Harry," she squealed enveloping him into a fierce embrace "I fancy you too, I don’t care about what I told Herrmione, I never gave up hope."

Harry, to say the least, was ecstatic. The only problem with this situation was that Herrmione was not with them, "Gin where is Herrmione, I wanted her to know about us and I had something to tell her, and it is very imperative that the both of you know. I haven't told anyone and the two of you are the ones that I trust the most."

To humor him Ginny said "She is supposed to be at the Burrow later today." After receiving a nod from Harry, Ginny leaned forward and placed a light kiss but in it was the promise of much more.

"Ginny I have something very important to tell you but I want to wait for Herrmione because this is difficult for me." Harry said with a slight pleading tone, and with a reassuring nod Harry proceeded to snog her senseless.

After a few hours Remus came back to collect Ginny and before she left Harry said to Ginny, “Gin please tell Monie that if anything goes wrong that she will always have a place in my heart were she can find the warmth she needs.” With a curt nod and a chaste kiss Ginny went home. Afterword Harry went into the kitchen, ate, cleaned his mess, went to his room and promptly fell asleep before his head hit the pillow.

**********************************

Remus dropped Ginny off at the burrow telling her to go inside because he had business to attend to, and after trying to figure it out she left in a huff because she wrung no knowledge from him about his business or Harry.

Remus gave a sigh of relief and went back to Dumbledore and the Dursley’s.

Flashback

Dumbledore looked to Remus with a shadow of fear in his eyes, “I will take them and notify the proper authorities, will you please go and fetch Miss Weasley and Miss Granger if she is there.” And with that, Dumbledore strode over toward his new captives and left with a pop, Remus did the same.

He showed up at the Burrow and proceeded to rap upon the front door waiting for someone to come forth so that he may be able to please his new godson, after waiting for a couple of minutes he tried again and just when he was about to leave the door opened. There in the doorway stood one of the objects of Remus' purpose for being there instead of punishing those that tormented Harry instead of protecting him. 'James, Lilly, Sirius, Harry I'm sorry I have failed you.' 'Mooney what is in the past is just that, the past, do not forget it but learn from it. Harry will listen to you and this is because you have not betrayed his trust unlike Dumbledore, do right by him and you'll have done right by us now go and help him.'

Remus stood on the walkway looking at Ginny with a smile. “Ah, just the person that I was looking for, may I come in?” he said, and as she stepped out of the way he walked in. “Ginny is Herrmione around?” he looked at her, and after receiving a shake from her he continued, “To bad, by the way is that what you are planning to wear today?” He asked looking at her with a mischievous grin. “Yes, but why do you ask?” she said. “Oh nothing,” he said slowly walking away from her “Harry just asked to see you if your willing to come over and Dumbledore asked me to bring you. So,” he said offering his hand, “If you are ready grab hold and let’s go.” Ginny looked at Remus disbelievingly and he knew the thoughts that were probably running threw her mind 'Harry Potter wanted to see her, Ginny Weasley, a short knobby kneed, skinny girl. “Remus why does he want to see me? I’m just a girl, what does he want with me?” Remus responded mysteriously “Oh I don’t know why he would want to speak with you, I mean when he asked he was blushing and the fact that you are a girl has absolutely nothing to do with it I’m sure.” He finished sarcastically, flashing the Marauders smile something he had not been able to do for a while now. With a shrill squeal, Ginny ran back upstairs and into her room as fast as she could.

After waiting a few minutes Ginny rejoined him in the front room, grabbed his hand, and with a pop they were gone leaving a note on the kitchen table.

They reappeared in the Dursley's backyard and Remus knocked softly upon the door and appearated away.

He arrived back at Grimuald place and he started to look for Dumbledore and found him and his captives in the front room, the Dursley’s were cowering like rats 'Damn you Wormtail, why did you betray them. We were your friends; we protected you from those that would do you harm, and included you in our adventures and you gave them to Voldemort and sentenced Sirius to that place why.' Remus don't worry about that now, you must concentrate at the task before you. "Professor what would you have me do now, and what will happen to these vile people?" He said, his words dripping with so much venom that it sent chills down the spines of the Dursley’s. "Remus," Dumbledore started, "the punishment that will be dealt to them will be decided later during an order meeting, and for that to happen I need you to collect said people, also we need to talk about what happened this morning at the Dursley’s. First, I understand that the partial transformation, and yes before you ask that is exactly what it was, is caused by extreme emotion and this time it was pure anger. In addition, let us not forget to mention his magical pressure, it is the likes that I have never seen, it is even greater than my own. I fear for those that would put those that he cares about in danger, or even just ridicules them. But enough of this the order must be notified." After a curt nod, Remus left to fetch the others.

After all of those that held high importance in the order were present Dumbledore spun the tale that was and is Harry's life, before and during Hogwarts time, skipping what were Harry's darkest moments at the Dursleys but he only scratched the surface. During his lengthy monologue none interrupted Dumbledore for they all sat in a shocked silence, even McGonigal was stunned speechless and her thoughts were displayed upon her face as were everyone else, save for those that already knew. Molly was the first to break the unnatural silence in a shaky voice, "This cant be true, how can it be? Harry is always in good health, a little underfeed yes, but never in were there signs of the neglect and abuse that you say they have done to him. And if even if a fraction of what you say is true why did you not remove him from there care?" There was a murmur of approval at her words, "How can this story possibly be feasible, someone would have seen something. And besides why should we believe that he has fought a Basilisk, hordes of Dementores, and what ever else they say that he does. How can a small child do what very few fully trained aurors can do. The only truth that I can see in this web of hearsay is that He Who Must Not Be Named has indeed returned, and ..." The person never got to finish there sentence because Remus sharply stood, a low threatening growl emitting from his through. "Speak not of what you do not know nor comprehend, Harry has been through more than many in this order and still stands tall. He is more of a Man than many in the Ministry. You have no right to speak against him, you do not know him and until you are learned in the ways of the life that he has lived your opinion is barred from this discussion. Only I and Severus know what he has lived threw, and why he did not report what he could see inside Harry's mind is unknown at the moment." As Remus finished he turned toward Snape as did the others in the room awaiting a response from the potions master. "Yes," Albus started, "I am most interested in this matter, why indeed was I not informed on what resided inside my grandsons mind, what horrors lie in his past. What have you hidden from me, I wish to know what happened during your lessons with him during potions and the occulemency lessons and I will be told NOW." He finished, raising his voice to the astonishment of the members in the room.

Some time latter the order dispersed each with a heavy heart and a grimace, but none surpassing Remus. "I'm so sorry, I've let down the only family that I have ever had and now the last members dirty laundry is out for all in the order to see. Harry, please forgive me for I knew not. I will try my damnedest to resolve my sins and be a better man so that I may be there when you need a strong arm. And after saying that, he walked off into the night, little did he know that there was an aged man watching him as he lamented into the blackness. "Yes Ramus, I agree with you and I will try to be apart of my grandsons life."
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