Midori thought she was an average girl,but that changed when she had her first encounter with a demon . . . something that should'nt even exist. Full summary inside.
(#) Thelionwaits 2008-03-29 02:48:18 PMVery exciting! You didn't hem and haw to get to the fight, you just plunged the reader right into it! Well done! Is your influence manga/anime or are you going with actual Chinese or Japanese mythos?
You do, however, have a few spelling difficulties, but who doesn't, eh? Some of your sentences seem a little long too. That's not a problem, and is easily cured with a period or two here and again.
Author's responseSorry for the late reply. Yeah, I know I messed up some. My influence is pretty much anime/manga, lol, I watch too much and decided to make a story that could hopefully, one day, become a comic. High hopes, but oh, well. Anyways, thank you so much for reading/reviewing and the advice!!