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Forever Young

Pixie Curtis

I represent something different to each of my three brothers. To Darry I am his little sister, the sister he has the power to be that protective older brother. I'm the one that he longs for me to pour my heart out to only to find himself leaning on me for that hope. He's my big brother, the only one I have.

To Sodapop I am his twin sister. His total equal. He's neither older nor younger than me we're the same. We're the ones that expect absolutely nothing of each other just to be ourselves. He expects me to act like myself and tell him what I want and be who I want. He wants me to be me, and he's happy with that.

To Ponyboy I am simply his big sister. I'm the one who is there to wipe the tears, to hold him and promise him that everything will be perfect and we'll survive. I'm there for him whenever he needs me as a sister. No matter how much bigger he gets than me in his eyes I'll always be forever his big sister.

But then the guys all represent something of each of my brothers too. Dally is like Darry, he's an older brother to me. Whereas Steve is like an added wheel making us triplets, he's one of my best friends and like Soda has an unexplainable understanding to who I am and who he is. Then Johnnycakes is like my Ponyboy, my little brother. He doesn't like me to wipe up his tears and talk to him but I'm still here if ever I'm wanted. But Two-Bit's the one that doesn't fit into this world of perfect reasoning. He's never been an older brother, a younger brother or someone full of understanding that they're an equal. He's always just been Two-Bit. I don't think I'll ever understand where Two-Bit fit into all of this. And I'll never rest until I do.

"Pixie!" I heard Soda hollering to me.

I dropped my homework and ignored the thump as the book fell to the floor. I opened my door and ran down the hallway and down the stairs into our lounge room and clasped my hand to my mouth.

"Oh Ponyboy what happened?" I whispered rushing to his side and looking at his face.

We were exactly the same height. I was three years older but he'd shot up and I hadn't grown taller in months. My eyes and his met and they begged me to stop mothering him in front of all the guys, they were pleading me and I reluctantly backed off slightly, my eyes narrowed in pure annoyance that I couldn't act as I pleased.

"He got jumped on the way home from the movies," I heard Darry tell me. And boy he didn't look very happy about it. "He was walking home alone," Darry said looking at Ponyboy pointedly.

"From school?" I asked and I saw Pony shoot me a warning glance, I might have been sounding motherly but I couldn't help it. "Because you should have gotten a lift with Steve or Two-Bit."

Pony threw me a look that told me to shut it. "No from the movies."

I sighed. I couldn't help it even though he looked like he wanted to kill me there and then. "Pony I would have gone with you, hell anything to escape algebra," I said pulling a slight face.

"And I was gonna ask you to help me!" Steve moaned loudly. I smiled slightly, that was what I was to Steve, and Two-Bit when he could be bothered with homework, a personal tutor.

"Pony next time ask one of the guys," Darry said stressing on the word 'guys', "Or carry a blade," he sighed. "Ponyboy for once would you just think."

I must have looked ready to start an argument with Darry that I was just as good as any of the guys but Soda gave me a small shove and when I looked at him he nodded towards Pony who was standing there awkwardly listening to Darry lecture him.

"Darry just shut up," I said loudly grabbing Pony's arm, "I'm gonna check him over okay?"

Darry looked very ready to tell me not to tell him to shut up but I was already dragging Pony to the bathroom and Soda had begun to point out that had Pony been carrying a blade it would have been a good reason for him to be jumped. And also that Darry would have been pissed about that anyway.

I pushed Pony into the bathroom and stepped inside closing and locking the door, now I was planning on mothering him whether he liked it or not but I'd at least be nice about it so that there was no way of the others getting in and seeing. He saw this and gave me a soft smile before sitting on the bathtub.

"So Pony why didn't you call anyone?" I began as I kneeled down to check out his face. "That's one nasty cut you got there,"

Pony rolled his eyes at me but I gave him a look that said don't-mess-with-me so he didn't tell me off for mothering him.

"Because I never would have been able to see the movie," he explained and I had to smile; none of us really had the patience to watch a whole movie. I had tried once and fell asleep.

"Oh I knew that, but you could have called someone to pick you up," I pointed out as I walked to the cabinet to get some cream for the cut, "I would have personally picked you up if there was a car here, you know that. I would have walked there for you."

"Yeah well I didn't want to put anyone out," Pony told me. He barely winced as I put the cream on the cut, I would have. I bet it stung like hell. "And it would've been worse if you came to get me Pixie."

"True," I smiled. "But I'd walk over coals for you Ponyboy,"

Pony didn't respond to that but instead stared down at his feet. I got up and put the cream away and sat down on the rim of the bath next to Ponyboy and stared down at my own feet.

"You know I only mother you 'cause I love you Ponyboy," I told him softly.

He nodded. "Yeah I know that,"

"And it bugs you a lot," I had to smile. "I'm sorry about that. But well someone has to do it. And Darry doesn't ever do it right. He just yells at you, but he does love ya Pony, he just don't know how to express it." I told him that because I knew that was the truth and I knew deep down that somewhere inside him Pony honestly didn't know that.

"Maybe," Pony said sounding awfully bitter. "But if he does think that then why can't he just stop yelling at me Pixie?"

I sighed and looked at him in the eyes. "I don't know Ponyboy. But it was like when mom and dad died. We all cried. He barely did. It's his way of approaching things, we all show love maybe he just doesn't,"

"He loves you and Soda, he shows that," Ponyboy said staring back into my eyes looking for something, just searching.

"Ponyboy I honestly don't know. But I'm not lying when I say he loves you," Ponyboy looked away and I looked once at his face, "Don't worry about the cut, it won't scar, and the bruise makes you look tough kid,"

He gave me a small smile and a look as if to say 'thanks' and I stood up and smiled slightly. I unlocked the door and Ponyboy stood up. I think he really needed that little pep talk because he did look a bit better than before at least, well in his eyes you could see that hope again. As I pushed the door open I stepped out and came back into the bustling and busy lives inside the Curtis household. I'd barely walked five steps when Soda pulled me onto the couch in a big hug.

"What's that for?" I laughed as I turned to look at him with a smile.

He kissed my cheek and I stared at him. "For just being you,"

"Okay," I laughed smiling. "Where'd that all come from?"

"Your talk with Ponyboy," Soda said in a low voice so none of our rather nosey gang would hear. "I think it helped a lot more than mine do." Soda told me nodding at Pony who was talking to Johnny and actually smiling pretty happily.

I nodded and looked back to my twin. "I sure hope it did. Soda I worry about him sometimes,"

"Yeah well he's tough," Soda said.

He didn't understand. Well I never really expected him to. Soda thinks that Pony is still grieving over our parents which is why he's all paranoid over the fact he thinks Darry doesn't love him, Darry of course doesn't know this. I'm the only one that's looked close enough to see Pony really does believe this lie he's told himself.

"Yeah I know," I said softly slipping his arm off of me. "Let me know when dinners ready, I have to do homework,"

"Why?" Soda asked me looking puzzled, he never understood my need to do homework, not because of Darry's nagging but because I knew it was my way out.

"Because I have to or I'll get in trouble," I said simply standing up. "And don't scream that it's ready, just get off your ass and come to my room." He smirked, I told him this everyday and he never listened. "This time I'm serious Soda if you don't I shall not come to dinner and Darry will get mad and if he doesn't drag me down there I won't eat at all and I'll fade away completely."

"Sure you're serious," Soda grinned.

I rolled my eyes. Okay I was serious about it but I wasn't gonna starve myself because my twin was too lazy to come and get me, 'cause that was plain stupid. Besides one of these days he'll learn to do it 'cause I swear Darry will kill him about screaming dinners ready all the time.

I walked to the stairs dodging Two-Bit's sprawled figure and his arms as he attempted to pull me onto the ground; something I was used to so was getting used to having to dodge him everytime I wished to leave or enter the room. He did grab my ankle once but Steve saw and called him perverted so he sat up to protest and let go at the same time. I grinned to Steve and disappeared upstairs to my room and closed my door.

I picked up my fallen math book and found my pencil underneath my bed. Sitting cross-legged on my bed my maths book in my lap I glanced to my homework. I only had three problems left and they made no sense. I sighed loudly, I'd done absolutely everything and I had put these off because they were so annoyingly hard. I hated algebra so much, it was the worse bit in maths, other than algebra I could stand it but the letters totally lost me.

I sighed again and placed the book on my bed and opened my door and slowly walked down the hall and opened Ponyboy and Soda's bedroom door and gave him a sad smile.

"I'm stuck again, can you help me please?" I asked clasping my hands together as if to beg him.

Pony grinned. I did this all the time. He was the only one of us that actually understood maths, it's his genius IQ or something, I tease him about that all the time but then beg for help, kinda ironic I know. Besides Pony was actually in my math class so you know.

"Like I could refuse you big sis," Pony smiled.

"Thank god," I sighed loudly. "This stuff is evil you know,"

"Not really,"

"Oh shut up with the whole nerd thing Pony it is evil," I exclaimed dramatically. "Steve will agree, won't ya Steve?" I shouted over the banister on the way back to my room.

"What?" Steve shouted back from the lounge.

"Just say yes!" I shouted back. "It's about the evil of math!"

"Yes!" He shouted back.

I flashed Pony a grin and he laughed at me. "Told ya,"

Ponyboy just laughed at me and it only took him fifteen minutes to explain the problems to me so I had them all finished and offered him mine to copy. He normally says no but he gladly accepted it this time, I think it was because it was a Friday and no one wants to do homework on a weekend.