A chapter written from Gerard's perspective and what he goes through with his father. He makes the decision he should have made a while ago.
“Gerard please don’t leave!” I run to the elevator just as it starts closing and I force my way inside. I see Gerard staring at the floor, completely unmoved by my plea. “Gerard...” I walk to him and place my hand on his shoulder.
He flinches and looks up at me. His eyes are red and puffy from the tears threatening to burst from them. He speaks quietly, “What do you want from me?”
“I can protect you, Gee. We can get out of this shit town and move somewhere far away. No one will ever hurt you again.” Tears blur my own vision as I place my hand on his cheek. I caress it gently and he leans into my touch. “Please stay with me, Gee. I’ll protect you...”
Gerard shakes his head as the elevator opens. “I’m sorry, baby, but I’ve gotta split. Maybe I’ll see you again.” He winks as he steps out of the elevator, and I step out after him.
“Gerard I’ve been following the leads that the police have given me on your whereabouts for years. I’ve tried so hard to find you. Don’t leave me now that I’ve finally found you.” I wipe my eyes with the back of my sleeve.
Gerard’s expression totally changes and he gives me a look like he couldn’t care less. “You still haven’t paid, by the way.”
I sigh and hand him all the cash in my wallet. “There, are you fucking happy now?!” I press the button to the elevator. Gerard seems surprised at the amount of cash I had given him, it must be around three hundred dollars. “Now you can run home to your pimp and waste it on him.” Tears roll down my face as I step into the elevator and press the button for my floor. “I’ve wasted my whole life on you...b-bitch.” I force the word out as the elevator door closes, and the last thing I see is the look of shock on Gerard’s face. I break down crying.
“I’ve wasted my whole life on you...b-bitch.” Ray stutters as the elevator door closes.
I have been called a lot of things while working on the streets: slut, whore, tramp, cunt...you name it. But for some reason, when Ray called me a ‘bitch’, it hurt me, and it hurt way more than any other name I had ever been called. I wipe my eyes and turn to walk out of the lobby of the apartment building.
I exit the lobby and start to walk down the street in the direction of our hidden house. As I approach a group of men in cloaks, I raise my guard up, and can only hope that they’re more into women than men. Sure enough, whistles come from the group as I walk towards them.
As I get closer, the men block the sidewalk. I stop in front of them and a fat one speaks up, “So what’s a pretty ‘lil thing like you doing out here this late?”
“What do you think?” I roll my eyes and gesture at what I’m wearing. “I’ve just finished with someone, and I’m very tired. I would be happy to fuck you all, but on a later date as I should be getting home.”
“Oh, we don’t wanna fuck you.” The man laughs. “We need a sacrifice, and dirty bitches like you are what the devil likes best.”
Two of the men advance on me and they grab a hold of my arms, holding me in place. I struggle as the fat man pulls out a knife. “Please!” I can do nothing but beg. “I’ll do anything!”
“The only thing you can do is sex, you fucking slut. Your life is meaningless, so we’ll do you a favor just end it.” He laughs coldly.
Tears start to roll down my face as the knife is placed to my chest, directly above my heart. The man starts talking gibberish and presses the knife into my skin. I watch as my blood beads from the cut, and I feel faint. I should have stayed with Ray, why didn’t I?
The man prepares to stuff the knife into my chest but he is knocked to the ground. Another man is behind him, holding a crowbar in his hands. I watch as he takes down the rest, and then he begins to advance on the men who hold me prisoner.
The men let go of me. “Yo man, we don’t want no trouble!” I turn to see that they are running down the sidewalk.
“T-thank you.” I am shaking violently as I turn back to the man.
“What the fuck are you doing out here, Gerard?” A familiar voice comes from the man and I turn to look at him. I sigh in relief as I see my brother’s familiar face.
“Thank God you’re here!” I run to him and stuff my face in his shoulder, while trying not to cry.
“C’mon, Gee. We should get back home.” Mikey leads me to his tiny white car and holds the passenger door open for me. I thank him as I sit down inside, he nods and shuts the door.
The drive home is silent, and sort of awkward. Mikey and I have been through a lot together ever since father took us. While I work the streets, he is out dealing drugs. Father told him that he was too ugly to be a streetwalker, and honestly I was relieved. If he had to go through what I do with the men and women who buy time with me, I don’t think he would be able to take it.
“Daddy was worried about you.” Mikey breaks through my thoughts as we turn into a secluded pathway.
“Only because I didn’t call him to say that I found someone. He probably thought he wasn’t gonna get to fuck me tonight.” I chuckle to break the mood.
Mikey isn’t buying it and he sighs. “How did we get ourselves into this mess, Gee?”
“Well you wouldn’t be in this mess, except you followed us.” I respond.
He hesitates. “I couldn’t leave you alone with him.”
“Not like it makes a difference, Mikes. He still has his way with me, and now you too.” I wipe my eyes. “You don’t know how horrible it is to hear your little brother get raped.”
“Actually, Gee, I know a lot more than you think. I heard you getting raped every night since you were little. Hell, we shared the same room until daddy couldn’t stand me crying anymore...” Mikey’s voice cracks.
“Let’s just leave it, Mikey. There’s nothing we can do about it.” I say as we pull into our driveway.
We get out of the car and walk up to the old cottage’s door. I knock five times, which the secret code for entry. Seconds later the door flies open and we walk inside. The door shuts behind us and I am greeted with a punch to the stomach. I wrap my arms around myself and mumble, “Nice to see you too.”
“Did you at least get cash, bitch?” My father’s cold voice comes from above me.
“Yes, actually.” I grit my teeth and hand over the money that Ray had given me.
Father takes a moment to count it and looks to be in shock. “So what did you do to get this, slut?” He chuckles and puts the money in his wallet.
“Just the usual. I would have gotten more if you hadn’t called me though.” I snort.
I instantly wished that I hadn’t said that as I get a slap across the face for it. “Don’t backtalk me.”
“Sorry, father. Can I go to sleep now? I’m very tired.” I yawn and take off my high-heeled shoes. Damn I hate those things, they’re fucking painful.
“No, of course not. You get home late, you have to pay the price.” Father smirks and drags me to my room. I let him have his way with me and do not fight back. I haven’t fought back to him in years as I didn’t see a point to it anymore.
I look away from him as he thrusts and I let the tears slide down my face. I feel father’s hand on me, his calloused fingers wiping the tears away. “Aww...what’s wrong, baby?” He asks with false sympathy.
“I want you to stop hurting my brother.” I say weakly as he thrusts faster. “Please.”
“Why in the world would I do that? He should be able to have some fun too!” Father laughs.
“I’ll do anything. Please, daddy. Please stop hurting my baby brother, he doesn’t deserve this. You can do whatever you want to me but please leave Mikey alone.” I look up at him with pleading eyes.
“I am sorry, Gerard, but I like his ass too much.” He finishes with me and kisses my lips before leaving the room.
I curl up in my sheets and cover my ears as he takes Mikey next. Mikey still isn’t used to it, and it still hurts him. Hearing his screams is just about the worst thing to ever hear. When finished, Mikey rushes into my room and curls up with me. I hold him tightly as he cries into my chest.
“Shh...sugar...it’s okay. It’s over now...shh...honey, it’s fine...I’ve got you.” I kiss his forehead as he sobs.
“Gee, I don’t want to be hurt anymore...” Mikey whimpers.
I bite my lip and nod, I don’t want him to be hurt anymore either. It looks like father did more damage to him tonight than any other night. I decide to do what I should have done a long time ago. “When father goes to sleep, we’ll get out of here. How about that?” I shake at the thought but try to stay strong for my brother.
“Where are we going to go, Gee?”
“To a friend’s house.” I say simply, and hold him tightly. I know that this is the only way to save Mikey while I still can, so that he won’t become a broken slut like me. I can only hope that Ray will let us stay with him.