Review for Harry Potter and the Marriage Contracts
(#) Ina_meishou 2008-03-25 04:16:45 PM
The Idea has merit, and the Interaction between the secondary characters is good. The main focus though, Harry and Daphne, needs work.
A tip: If there is any kind of conflict over missing one date, especialy in a boarding school, where they see eachother dayly anyway, the relationship is unlikely to work, especialy in the "True love" fashion of romance you seem to be going for.
Undying trust is not built on pointless, petty conflict.
Kudos on actualy having Ron not be an idiot, even if you were trying for the oposite.
- Pity indeed. I don't view Hermione nor Harry as particularly 'nieve' nor 'socialy inept', but that's me.
- I love tips on how relationships work, hopefully your wise advice will assist me in making my 30 year marriage turn out to last...
- I wasn't trying for an 'oposite' what ever that might be.
- Thanks for your input, I feel much better about myself now.
(Short drabble - one shot) Gerard used to think he was Peter Pan. Frank is still a lost boy.
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- Stories: 40298
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