(#) BenRG 2008-05-15
Interesting. This chapter is definately slower-paced than the others but I don't mind as a 'constant high' can be wearing on the reader.
An interesting idea, putting Hermione with Justin. Don't worry about making it 'troo luv' or something like that. They are still only young - maybe it will work out in the long-term, maybe it won't. It is the finding out that is the fun part.
I liked Harry's stay in the dungeons. It was intereresting to see how the Slytherins were reacting to him. What is the bet that they initially thought he was there to attack them?
I also like the idea of alcoholic!Draco. I wonder if he will extend his new declining habits to the rest of the school. I think the thought of him turning up drunk for every lesson could be an excellent basis for comedy.
Why does everyone think that Tonks totally lacks domestic skills? I admit that it is funny and in character, but I can't really imagine Andy letting her get away with it.
It is odd but only the flashback scene at the outset and the part with Tonks is really significant to the overall plot. We are slowly seeing Harry sort out his life and getting clues to how he is planning to break the chains of the so-called 'light'.
BenRG's Rating: 8/10
Author's response
- My intention for this entire fic was for it to be a slow paced bit of fluff. Then Daphne happened, and threw all my plans off. Ah well.
- After screwing her over so throughly with Ron, I wanted to get her into a gentle relationship that may or may not become physical. It occurred to me that I've never seen a Hermione/Justin pairing which is odd considering how much they have in common.
- The dungeon scene was to show that if Harry wants to be with Daphne, he needs to know her world as much as she needs to know his. Given the two dimensional tension between the houses, I suspect that a simplistic "Gryffindor in the Dungeon! He's here to kill us" reaction was forefront in their minds.
- I'm glad someone caught Draco drinking, I was starting to wonder if I needed to hang neon bar signs around his corner to make the point. I don't know if I'd go as far as alcoholic, but he has been hitting the bottle since his father's death.
- I don't know why, but it seems to fit her. Maybe Andy used House Elves... I'm basing the Tonks character here on a female friend, who I do occasionally clean up after and for whom I have alphabetized her porn (once by primary sex act, which pissed her off to no end.)
- It will pretty much continue like that. In (i think) two chapter will be a 'Major Life Changing Event With a Decision That Will Forever Change Harry's Life' and I apologize for it in advance. I hate those things, but it's the way the story is going and I can't get my stubborn muse to change direction...