Review for Serena's Savior
(#) elizedward23 2006-11-10 09:06:19 PM
Your first chapter was pretty good, but the return in the second chapter wasn't that exciting. I think you need a stronger plot. I mean, she goes there with all those strange creatures but then she's looking at the ground, then she has to leave. I get the feeling that more exciting parts are coming up but the reader needs to be enticed to keep reading.
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The last behest of a doomed witch. AU one-shot
In: Harry Potter
- Authors: 481849
- Stories: 40155