FicWad

Since you want it...

It needs more detail. This will help add length and more imagery. For instance, maybe you could write a little bit about Frank's day at work, then lengthen out the before and during sex scene.

Also, a bit of better word choice would help :)

I hope you don't think I sound bitchy or something, it's just something I noticed.

Here's an example:

http://www.ficwad.com/story/30491