http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XM_hIwvI7uU&list=LLrgCJAyAIl8tQLCYJu4NFKw
no lies, just love.
Even after two AM, dude, you can email me. crash.after@gmail.com
I can promise you a plethora of oddly humorous songs/stories? I'll be friendly. We can even go to Friendly's to prove my point. And I'll bring my busted telecaster. We can tape music to the walls, until ugly things are said by pretty people. So, we'll kick that joint. And end up here. On a ghostly site called FicWad.
I'm sorry. That should've made sense. I'm just a bit worried about you 'cause you deleted your diary and something I'd never read [i'm not creepy in that way, you're just on my email alerts] called '.. -.. . .- .-.. .. ... - .. -.-. --..-- .... --- -. . ... - -.-- -.. .. .- .-. -.--', right?
Maybe it's stupid worrying, but I have a this weird sense that you're out there somewhere not totally alright.
This is ticktockticktock writing, by the way. It's beautifully clockwise, you know? Like, "time's not poison but once you drink it all you'll die. so let's just slip it real slow, yeah we can nurse it all night" kind of thoughtfulness. You probably get it 'cause you wrote it. Ah, shit. I'm not talking well tonight. You know what? Screw all these words I'm typing and listen to this shi---TASTE OF THE HIGHWAYS, MAN: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7392ZCUJDqc&list=LLrgCJAyAIl8tQLCYJu4NFKw
Author's response
i'm really as fine as i could ever be, i'll be a little distant for a while, but i'll stick around. tired of lies. spiraling out into that web. can't think straight. but i'll be okay. i can't worry the world with my problems, and it wouldn't be fair to carve myself into your life and make you feel cheated when you can't help in a fashion that feels finished. i know that's not what you want and i don't think i want to push you away, but. i'm terrified.
i'm terrified you'll hate me. and you will.
-az