Categories > Celebrities > My Chemical Romance > A Shot To Remember

Im Not Okay

by jewelstar105 2 Reviews

Category: My Chemical Romance - Rating: PG-13 - Genres: Drama,Romance - Characters: Gerard Way - Published: 2008/06/30 - Updated: 2008/06/30 - 1215 words

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There was silence
“Are you serious”?, she asked quietly
“I wish I wasn’t”, he replied with his head still buried in his hands trying to shut the world out
“That’s what made you drink”?, she asked not much louder than a whisper
“Well I wasn’t planning on drinking too much til your boyfriend turned up, you can imagine how much I love spending time with him”, he answered sarcastically, getting up on his feet
“Oh Gerard, why didn’t you tell me earlier“?, she said with a slight smile as if she was amused
“Dunno”, was all the excuse he could muster
He stood avoiding her stare placing his hands in his pockets, waiting for her next words, waiting to be let down gently.
“Ya know Gee, that information would have been really useful a few days ago”, she said still smiling
“Why’s that”? he asked intrigued
“Cos I have feelings for you too”, Kelli admitted with blushed cheeks
Gerard’s heart nearly beat its way out of his chest, did he just hear right? She really liked him back?, Gerard felt like all his birthdays and Christmases had come all at once, he had to desperately fight the urge to take her in his arms then and there but he knew it wouldn’t be that easy and something told him there was an almighty BUT coming very soon.
“Really”? he asked timidly chancing a peak at her
“Yeah, I liked you from the start but I didn’t think I was your type and I knew it wasn’t a good idea to mix work and pleasure”, Gerard mentally kicked himself for letting this go on and dragging himself through all that crap when she could have been his all along.
He couldn’t take it anymore and he had done enough restraining himself to last a lifetime, he had no reason to, he didn’t need to dream about it anymore, he marched over to her, took her face in his hands and planted the sweetest kiss on her lips, as she opened her mouth to grant him access he pressed harder and the kiss grew more intense, he ran his tongue along her bottom lip before capturing her mouth deeply, he was growing hungrier for her with each passing second, this was even better than he had imagined, he couldn’t quite believe it was happening, but he let himself immerse in the moment completely, he let his hands leave her face and placed them around her waist resulting in a close embrace, he pulled her even closer to him wanting to feel her body pressed against his, hell he wanted more than that, but he wasn’t going to push his luck. They broke apart gently stopping to place small pecks on each others lips. Gerard kept his forehead against Kelli’s and smiled at her.
“Wow”, was all he could say in his state of euphoria
“Yeah, my point exactly”, she replied slightly out of breath from that amazing kiss
“More where that came from”, he said as his lips made there way back to hers, ready to start their assault all over again
Kelli put her fingers over his lips before they could reach their goal, he stopped in his tracks, and gave her a confused look
“Gerard, like I said it would have been good to know a few days ago”, she whispered confirming his worse fears
“Your not leaving Nick are you”, he asked as his faced dropped
“I can’t just toss him aside Gerard, that’s not fair”, Gerard moved away with an unpleasant feeling in the pit of his stomach
“You let me kiss you and your staying with Nick?, he asked with an ugly tone
“I wanted that kiss as much as you Gerard, I thought you realised that ‘s all it could be”, Kelli wanted so bad to kiss him again but her better judgement told her it would be wrong
“I DON’T FUCKING BELIVE YOU”! Gerard shouted at her then turned and walked away leaving Kelli feeling awful, she was torn between what she wanted and the right thing to do.
“Gerard please don’t walk away”, she said just loud enough for him to hear
“Congratulations Kelli, you just broke my fucking heart”, he yelled back and kept walking not daring to look back
“Gerard please”, she added as tears once again fell from her eyes.
Gerard didn’t respond he just kept walking, he just hoped he didn’t run into Nick, he was afraid of what he might do if he saw him now, he didn’t know if he could control his actions the way he was feeling, he just wanted to get out, go somewhere else where he could be truly alone, he kept going until he reached the road and called himself a cab.
Kelli made her way back to the tour bus, her heart heavy, it was nice to know that Gerard had feelings for her, but she liked Nick too and she felt obligated to see what she could have with him, after all she loved being with him, he was fun and romantic, but Gerard was like her soul mate they just understood each other, no one had get really got was she was about, until she met Gerard.
She plonked on the sofa and glanced at her watch, she stared in horror as she realised the band was due to be on stage in half an hour, damn where did the time go?, her mind wasn’t on her job, she mentally scolded herself and ran to the backstage area, praying everyone else was doing everything they should be despite her absence, she took a deep breath as she got closer, she could hear the support band playing, that was definitely a good sign, she walked into the bands dressing room to see the guys dressed in their black parade costumes, raring to go.
“There you are”, Bob exclaimed throwing his hands in the air
“What the fuck Kelli, we have been looking for you everywhere”, added Ray with his guitar on his lap
“I am so sorry guys, I fucked up and I apologise, it wont happen again”, she said remorsefully
“S’ok, were cool, you’re here now”, said Ray tuning his guitar
“Ok you guys all set”?, she asked taking a deep breath, relieved.
“Urm not exactly”, Frank said from the dressing table where he was having his eye makeup applied
“Why, what’s up”, asked Kelli hoping this would be easily resolved
“We have no lead singer, Gerard didn’t show up, we were hoping he was with you”, he replied
Kelli felt a cold chill and her stomach plummeted, Gerard wasn’t here?, where the hell was he? She didn’t think for a minute he wouldn’t show up, this was very bad, they couldn’t play without Gerard, and forfeiting a show would be strike one against her, and a lot of angry fans to deal with.
Kelli’s legs turned to jelly and she grabbed the closet chair.
“Guy’s I have no idea where he is”, she admitted and watched everyone look at her in horror.
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