What if Luna responded differently to Harry during their conversation before the leaving feast? AU set near the end of OoTP. Harry/Luna
(#) AberforthsAvatar 2008-07-20 08:58:42 AMI wish that I had found this story earlier, but am so glad that I found it today. I especially like your treatment of Luna and Minerva. You've given each character a little twist that is quite refreshing. I thought this chapter was a very nice blend of dialog, narrative and Harry's internal POV. Well done. Thanks for sharing it with us.
- I agree with the good Doctor, fools rush in. I did:)
The summer's looking up, and the description of the lovegood home was great. Enough details to give the outlines, and plenty of space for my own imagination.
Your Moody is absolutely wonderful. Still tougher than most nails, he still has the ability to be a bit human. I usually miss that in the oh too common hardass-Moody. I'd advice against using too much Hogwarts faculcy. It's supposed to be training, not summer school, right? If you need ideas on possible Swedish, or Norse, resources or phrases you're welcome to dial "seidheim" at hotmail. Happy to help. Now, let's see who gets the next chapter out first. :)
Author's responseHi Vanir,
Thanks for the willingness to help out - I've sent an email off with what I'm hoping for.
I don't mind Moody myself. We know he's a tough old veteran, but I've tried to expand a little on the character we saw in the movies as well. The Moody that would throw a duster across a classroom, and hum along to himself at a ball. (I know, it was Barty Jr impersonating him, but still).
As for the tower, that really came out of DH, though I did create the island counter for them to work at. I imagine it as something like a breakfast bar.
(#) jabarber69 2008-07-20 11:40:16 AMWell good back info...this is the type so far in the last couple of chapters that you wished you came across with about 30 more chapters in front of them...nah just kidding I really like your story just wish it was further along is all!
Author's responseHmmm, well, I realy don't know how long it'll take this story to get to any particular place.
I mean, do I take it up until the end of the summer break (as Lorddwar did in his honks 'Summer of Change'), or through to the end of Harry's 6th year before calling this 'complete' and starting a sequel?
As far as the pace goes, I did categorise this as a 'romance', so I expect most of the story will continue to be around the characters and their interactions with each other. I don't think it'll be quite as drawn out as say Vox Corporis though (great H/Hr).
If you mean further along with the romance, then I'm going to leave you guessing on that one. I think poor Luna's working on him, but short of sitting in his lap and planting one on him, I think Harry's going to need a map and compass to work things out... or at least, that's how it usually works isn't it? When the right time comes along, it'll happen. Like DrT said, I'm not going to try and rush or push things to happen. None of them have any experience, or from what I can tell, many (if any) role models around their age group to help them out, so taking it slow seems right to me.
(#) animemonster 2008-07-20 01:38:15 PMAnother excellent chapter. I'm still sad. At least now I got where McGonagall was apparating to and from. I like it this way better than the usual linear style in which the reader has more information than the possible enemy so reading the enemy's plans seems tedious at best because you already know that they will not succeed. I also like how you have multiple contingency plans working and being used, instead of the same first plan being successful.
Oh, and probably my favorite part of this is, Harry doesn't seem extra emo, he doesn't seem to be superpowered, and he doesn't seem to be a regular Casanova. Please keep up the good work.
Author's responseThanks for the review. I kinda agonised over the order of chapters 8 & 9 because I generally hate flashbacks mysef.
However, having watched a great movie called 'Memento', I can see the value in being able to have a scene where not everything is known and anticipated in advance. Which I think is pretty much what you said.
The impression that I get from Harry is that by and large, he's not one to really take charge & initiate anything, unless it's in times of danger, then he 'switches on'. I figure all those years of being the Dursley's house elf will have made him fairly submissive. But I think with some training and positive reinforcement, his confidence should improve.
- love this story ,i don't see enough luna stories , and while i would like to see hp/ll/hg , it should be only if the story leads there . But please don't do rw/hg ,i never thought that pairing ever rang true, unless the story leads to it better then canon did. Also like the normalish harry.
(#) stealacandy 2008-07-21 12:26:58 PMWhen Luna tells Hermione parents she is going with the Knight Bus, they should inquire after what she was going to do until night... never fail to use the oportunity for comic relief.
"Aren't your parents coming to take you home, Luna?" asked Hermione's mother.
"Oh, no," said Luna. "My dad's still at work, won't finish off for several hours yet. I'm going to ride the Knight Bus."
"The night bus?" asked Hermione's mother. "You want to tell me you are going to wait here, all on your own, all day, so you can catch the night bus? Aren't any day busses going your way?"
"No, mum," said Hermione. "It's the Knight Bus. As in knights, in white armour and shining horses and all that?"
"Oh, I see,' said her mother. "And it goes out from here? Does it have a special platform like platform nine and three quarters as wel?"
"Actually, no," said Luna. "You can summon it from everywhere. you just hold up your hwand like thi-"
"Don't!" Hemione cut her off urgently, lowering her wand hand down. "You don't want to summon it in the middle of a crowded building!"
"I don't?" asked Luna, somewhat bewildered.
"No, you don't". Hemione's tone bode no arguments.
"Oh, alright then, I'll just go outside and call it up." she said.
Hermione's mother still looked hesitant.
"Still, taking the bus, dear? All by yourself? Maybe we could give you a lift home?" she offered.
"Oh, no," said Luna. "I've been waiting all year for the ride, I've been collectiong the toothbrushes every year. I'm hoping to get a purple one this time. I don't have a purple one."
"Toothbrushes?" repeated Hermione's mother.
"Oh, yes, they give you a toothbrush for an extra sickle o the Knight Bus." Luna replied happily. I have a special drawer for my toothbrush collection.
"You... collect... toothbrushes?" asked Hermione's mother faintly.
"Yes," said Luna. "What else would I do with them? They are souvenieres! For tourists, you see."
"brush your teeth?" Hermione's mother suggested.
"Brush my teath?" Luna inquired. "Why on Earth?"
"To keep them clean, of course!" replied Hermione's mother hotly. She was on familiar grounds here, at least.
"Oh, no, the tooth faries take care of that, of course!" answered Luna.
At that point, Hermione's mother decided it was probably better not to argue. She changed the subject.
"You say you can call this... Knioght Bus from everywhere?" she asked.
"Yes," said Luna.
"And you don't have anyone waiting for you at home? No pressing buisness to attend to?"
Luna exchanged a quick look with Hermione. "No..." she said, slowly.
Hermione's mum smiled at her. "Well then," she said. "Why don't you come with us for the time being, we're going to eat out, you can dine with us, pass the time, then catch the bus from there. How would you like that?"
"Well," said Luna, uncertainly. "Oh, alright then."
And they were on their way.
Now that I think about it, how do the Weasleys get home/ We know how they got to Hogwarts the last times - by flying, extended car on second year, by ministry provided cars on third, by taxi on fourth, by the knight bus on fifth, I think, but how do they get back?
And, what with Luna living practically next door, why didn't she simply return home with them?
P.S. If you actually decide to use this, I take credit.
Purvuer of comic relief to fanfics everywhere.
(As long as they are on FicWad and deal with Harry Potter and don't absolutely suck ass.)
(P.P.S. ff.net is good too!)
P.P.P.S. I loved it when Harry decided to watch what he was saying around Luna after she agreed she should have, not only accept his help, but actively seek it out...
P.P.P.P.S. A cliffhanger, huh? Good on you I don't know where you live...
P.P.P.P.P.S. Since Tom A. confessed he's hit a writing block with "Summer of Contract", his own "Harry goes with Snorcack Hunting with Luna and gets his elusive independence and some training on the side" story, this is shaping up to be a nice replacement.
Although, I must confess, I'm at loss as to what pudding has to do with anything.
Keep up the good work,
Author's responseOoooh, I think I'm channelling trelawney.. I can see some people are about to bcome upset with you
I googled the title of the 'tom a. ' story you mentioned and found a meteoricshipyards story by that name that isn't on ff.
So, I've got to read it before I do anything else.. (like write)
Besides, sounds like I'm going to like the plot! :D
PS. Thoughts of Pudding was just the chapter of the overly long drabble that became chapter 1. It originted with the opening sentence. It kinda stuck for the entire story when I realised that nobody really cares what a story is called. I suppose I can rename it to 'Harry Potter and the Story by Brian' if you like? :D
PPS. Thanks for the Omake! (shakes head.. wow, someone wrote an Omake for my story.. cool!)
PPS. Thanks for pointing me to a new story!
PPPS (Brian points at a spot behind mo before walking off) "Better watch out for that lot with the torches and pitchforks..." ;)
PPPPS. Just kidding, I doubt it'll take me long to read it.
(#) stealacandy 2008-07-21 12:56:40 PMA small change:
At that point, Hermione's mother decided it was probably better not to argue, showing where Hermione got her intelligence from. She changed the subject.
"You say you can call this... >>>Knight Bus from everywhere?" she asked. (Delete the "o" in the middle of "knights".)
(#) stealacandy 2008-07-21 12:59:08 PMP.P.P.P.P.P.S.
Ivanna and Rupert? Hermione's parents? I pity teh child born to these two - in their roles as HP characters and in Real Life alike.
But Hermione? Couldn't be farther away from Hermione than that.
Well, okay, I can think of a thing or two that would be further away from her if I set my mind to it, but that would be hard work...