(#) tangentsferret 2008-09-18This is excellent! An extremely high technical standard: no typos, no homonym switches (spellcheckers are Evil, imo), no tense or viewpoint slippage, consistent characterization, and a lovely atmospheric use of descriptive language. I particularly enjoyed Lucien's reaction to Molly: she's not exactly up to his standards of grace and deportment, now is she? I was a bit startled that once he had inspected the parlor at the Burrow he was still open to the betrothal. Perhaps later he will suggest tutors for little Ms Ginevra?
Author's responseLaCroix is nothing but stubborn. When he's convinced that something is in the best interests of the Family, nothing can deter him. The Weasleys were chosen for political reasons. I'm not saying that this will end up H/G, because frankly, I don't think it will. For now, however, the pairing is necessary for the plot in a few years.
- Very original and of superior quality. This is a Dumbledore that I could envision stealing the Philosopher's Stone to extend his life in order to lead the wizarding world, which he considers helpless without him. It would be 'for the greater good', after all.
Author's responseVery possible. He's a persuasive old bastard, and most likely attempted to talk Flamel out of the Stone. I won't say anything more, though. :) You'll have to wait and see.
(#) DaphneGreengrass 2008-09-21not a bad story so far, besides the setup of Weasley's.
read the reviews/responses for chap2 and am glad to see that you are leaning towards Susan now instead of Ginny.
as it seems so far, you are molding Harry-Henri into a noble class figure and a warmage. marrying him off to a poor peasant family like the Weasley's with no political power would be a bad thing.
really though, since you are shooting for him to bring about an equality to all beings, I think a more neutral family would be the best fit.
Bones' are in that more neutral alignment because Amelia is always portrayed as showing no bias. Greengrass', Davis' never linked to Voldie, although are considered dark.
is Walburga still alive? if she is, you should somehow include her as you have stated that the Black's opposed Dumbles placement of Harry since he is the acknowledged Black heir.
Author's responseAccording to canon, Walburga died in 1985, well before Henri returned to England. The Blacks in general filed a protest, but it never went further, because Dumbledore quashed it. As Head Warlock, he has the power to do so. Arcturus could've filed something, because he didn't die until 1991, but by then Harry was well and truly lost.
Sirius may've been burned off the tapestry, but Walburga wouldn't have had the authority to disinherit him, because she wasn't Head of the family--Arcturus was. And, well, with Regulus dead, Sirius was the only male heir in the direct line. From examining the family tree over on the Lexicon, it appears that after Sirius, it's entirely possible that Harry is the only other direct heir, aside from Draco.
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