Categories > Original > Drama > Beat of Their Own Drums
A/N: This is a special installment! Anybody know why? Of course not, 'cause none of you can see the document...but I'll tell you. This is the story that breaks the 100 page mark! YAY! Now, if you're expecting some fantabulous story, I'm afraid you're probably going to be disappointed. I didn't enjoy writing it much.
Disclaimer: I do not own the lyrics to "Who Said".
Song Used: Hannah Montana's "Who Said".
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Twenty: Who Said
Puppet: Paige Waters
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
I'm more then just your average girl,
I'd like to turn me up,
And show the world,
'Cause I can talk the talk,
But this girl just wants to rock,
I'm individual,
I'm not like anyone...
When I was a little girl, my mom always told me to reach for the stars.
And I tried. I wasn't much like the other little girls who wanted to be princesses or ballerinas, though. Those things really didn't make much sense to me anyway. So a princess got frilly dresses and got married to a handsome prince; big deal. My plain dress was good enough for me and just because someone married a good-looking boy didn't mean he loved them the way they wanted him to. So ballerinas could dance around in pink tights.
Wow. Dream big.
No, I wanted different things. My first big dream was to be a teacher. The idea of being able to know so much and being able to share it with other people was intriguing to the five-year-old me. I could know more than my big brothers, be smarter than mom, outwit daddy! All I could think of the power, the possibilities that could come with that. Sad, perhaps, that such a small child would be interested in power, but I was the youngest and the only girl out of three, making authority a tempting stranger.
Then I wanted to be an archaeologist. My brothers had sparked that idea when I was about six or seven. My parents had just recently decided to introduce us to Indiana Jones, but I had been too young to watch, so Buck and Luke got to watch while I pouted up in my room. When the movie was over they thundered upstairs and Buck told me all about it while I listened, moon-eyed. Oh, the adventures I could have if I had that job! I could be just like Indy, outsmarting booby traps and discovering ancient artifacts that no one had ever seen before...
Slowly, the interest in archeology transformed into one of similar form: paleontology. I remember staring up at the towering Tyrannosaurus skeleton at the museum and wondering what it must've been like to uncover such a massive beast. The idea that such a curious-looking creature could've died millions of years ago in the very spot I was standing in was mind-blowing.
But then mom and Buck died, and I wasn't interested in anything at all. I had been devastated. I'd lost both my heroes in a mere few seconds. Never again would my mother tell me to reach for those twinkling celestial beings. Never again would Buck tell me that he'd beat up any loser who told me I wasn't strong or smart enough.
I guess one could say my inspiration went with them. For the longest time, I simply looked up at those stars and cried because I didn't have anyone to tell me to stretch for them.
But then I realized something. I didn't need anyone to do that. I could do it for myself. I was my own person with hopes and dreams.
I can be glamorous,
Just like you see in all the magazines,
I can be cool as ice,
Or anything I wanna be...
“Um...wow.”
I smiled at Becca and twirled about, enjoying the feel of the clean new fabric of my homecoming dress against my skin. I usually didn't particularly like dressing up, but this was an exception. This was for my first real dance. The first time I'd been invited by a boy. And out of all boys it happened to be Nick Jonas.
I wanted to be beautiful for him, both because he deserved it and because I needed to know that I was capable of it. I was the sort of girl who had shame, who had a problem with showing off too much skin, and was sometimes made fun of by the boys or belittled by the girls because of it. The dress was not a bawdy or raunchy thing, but it was snug and came down a little more than I was used to.
Guessing from the look on Becca's face, it was a startling change for her too. “You like it?” I asked my friend eagerly.
Her shocked expression suddenly became doubtful, as if she wasn't sure how to answer. “It's...okay.”
Had it been any other day, I would've been heartbroken. For far too long I'd been dependent on her to validate me, but I didn't need to. Nick had shown me that a long time ago, and I couldn't have been more grateful to him. Plus, I kind of expected her to be somewhat apathetic; Nick and I had become an official pair and she still wanted him for the fame.
I didn't need her.
Who said, who said I can't be Superman?
I say, I say that I know I can,
Who said, who said I won't be President?
I say, I say you ain't seen nothing yet...
“So you really think you're gonna be able to just go off to college in South America?” Luke asked doubtfully, “I mean, what're you gonna say? 'Hey, Dad, I want to go to Chile for a couple of years. It's not like you'll miss me or anything.'”
I shrugged, not looking up from my Spanish homework. With practiced, fluid ease I scribbled out words in a language I had not been raised knowing. When I wrote or spoke in Spanish, words just came so easily. It was almost as if English should've been my second language. Why shouldn't I have been able to study Spanish even further by going to South America?
“He'll let me go,” I said confidently, placing the final comma and looking up and my brother with a small smile, “and even if he doesn't right away, I'll figure out a way to do it. He can't hold me down forever, ya' know.”
No one could.
Go on and make some noise,
Every girl has her choice,
To lead their own parade,
I do it my way!
“Hey, Paige?”
“What's on your mind, Izz?” I replied quickly, curiously glancing up into the big blue eyes of my best friend. It didn't take a particularly skilled shrink to tell that she was thinking hard about something. Her face was tight with both eyebrows lifted, nose slightly scrunched, lips pulled into a soft frown and eyes narrowed ever so slightly. She was even chewing on her lip.
“What did you tell Nick when you decided to leave for Chile?”
I couldn't help but feel a stab of sorrow at the very mention of that time in my life. I'd been so scared and poor Nick had been so heartbroken...it was an upsetting memory I liked to leave buried underneath the happier ones. “Ya' mean how I explained myself?” I asked, though it was really more of a statement than a question, “I just told him that I wanted to teach.”
“Do you think...do you think Joe's gonna understand if I tell him I'm going to Hawaii? For school, I mean.”
I smiled at her. Joe and Izzy had been a pair for longer than anyone could remember. “'Course. You guys have already survived one long separation, one more isn't going to hurt.”
“You sure?”
“Positive,” I replied, “if that's what you feel you need to do, he'll understand.”
I can be soft and sweet,
Or louder than the radio,
I can be sophisticated,
Or totally go out of control...
“I've missed you so much.”
His touch was so soothing after living thousands of miles apart for several months, but I can't help but feel as if something is missing. His voice was so soft and his words were so sweet, spoken deliciously close to my ear in a loving whisper, but I wanted to feel as if he was my friend and not just my lover. I smiled gently, his dark curly hair brushing against my cheeks. “I missed you too, Nick,” I murmured softly in reply, “but ya' know what else I missed?”
He chuckled. “What?”
“Our snowball fights.”
He laughed again, a little louder this time. He pulled back, lightly brushing his thumb against my cheek, a smile touching his velvet lips. “Same old Paige.”
Who said, who said I can't be Superman?
I say, I say that I know I can,
Who said, who said I'm not electrifying?
I say, I say...
“How come you and Dad never get along, sis?”
I sighed, knowing that I was in for another one of Luke's 'big brother' lectures. He had not been born the oldest and had in fact been the middle child, so he had never been as good as Buck was at being the advisor and bodyguard we younger siblings needed. Still, I couldn't help but admire him for trying.
“Because he treats me like a little girl still.” I answered bluntly, relaxing into the passenger seat of my brother's truck.
Dad had just recently tried to tell me that I couldn't see a certain young man with because he was simply too dangerous, but what he didn't know was that I'd fallen in love with the kid long before I'd even thought of saying anything. Mac and I...we'd been friends since we were children. It was impossible to tell us that we couldn't see one another.
It was foolish of him to think that he had some sort of hold on us.
Luke frowned sharply. He obviously didn't like the fact that I hadn't even had to think about my answer first. “You can't just do everything you want.”
I looked at him and cocked my head to one side, amused. Did he think himself intimidating using those words? If I had a nickel for every time I'd heard someone say that, I could've just bought my father's acceptance. “I can damn well try.”
There's no holding back,
Staying right on track,
'Cause you control the game,
So let 'em know your name,
No limitations on imagination,
Imagine that!
“One of these days,” my brother said in that same severe tone that drove me absolutely crazy, “you're gonna really get yourself hurt and you're gonna wish that you were a little more careful.”
“No,” I insisted, closing my eyes calmly, “I'm just gonna wish that I didn't have so many people trying to distract me in the first place.”
I could envision Luke pressing his lips together for a moment before he answered. “Point taken,” he mumbled in a defeated tone just as he pulled up to my childhood home's driveway and shutting off the car's engine, “just try not to fight with him this time, okay?”
“I can't promise anything,” I said, lazily opening my eyes, “but I can try.”
If he tried to bring me down again, I wasn't going to try and be meek about it this time.
Who said, who said I can't be worldwide?
I say, I say time is on my side,
Who said, who said I can't be ten feet tall?
I say, I say that I can have it all...
“What'cha thinkin' about, sweetheart?”
His tone was lazy and the circles his thumb was making on my cheek were lopsided and never-ending, not wanting to put too much work into the slow Saturday we'd spent on the couch. I didn't open my eyes, nor did I stir from my position on my side, completely content just to feel his strong arms around me and have his warm chest pressed gently to my shoulder blades. “My mom.” I answered softly, tightening the hold I had on his free hand ever so slightly.
Mac's ever-gentle lips found a sensitive area just behind my ear. “I'm right here if you need to talk.”
“Mm.” I acknowledged the sweet sentiment absently, not completely registering it because my mind was in a completely different place.
So I'd reached for the stars. I'd done what I wanted to do with my life, and I was glad for it. Sure, I'd run into a little hurt here and there, but ultimately, it had been worth it all to end up where I was, literally, right now.
I'd gone back after the early dream of being a teacher, found something I loved and discovered the best way to put them together. I couldn't think of anything better to do with my time then use my talent to instruct those who could very well end up loving it too.
I'd decided that the best way to do that was to go to school out of the country. I'd convinced my father to allow me to go, even though it took considerable effort. My choice had forced me to say goodbye to my first true love, even though it had hurt like Hell and even now I'm not quite sure how I managed to make it through.
But it had been worth it. I had earned my degree and was working as a 9th grade Spanish teacher in the high school I'd gone to when I was a kid. Though some of them clearly didn't want to be there, the smiles on the other kids' faces when they discovered something new made my heart soar with pride. Closing a door had opened a window to another. I'd earned my father's acceptance and married the young man I loved, and could think of no other person I'd rather spend my life with.
Mom, wherever you are, I hope you're proud.
Who said, who said I can't be Superman?
I say, I say that I know I can,
Who said, who said I won't be President?
I say, I say you ain't seen nothing yet,
You ain't seen nothing yet,
Whoa, yeah!
Who said?
Come on, yeah!
That's right!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
A/N: Erm...yeah. When I saw this one come up on the screen I gave an audible groan 'cause I really didn't want to have to write a songfic using it, but rather then put it off for later I just decided, "ah, the Hell with it. I'll just get it over with now." Sad, I know.
Disclaimer: I do not own the lyrics to "Who Said".
Song Used: Hannah Montana's "Who Said".
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Twenty: Who Said
Puppet: Paige Waters
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
I'm more then just your average girl,
I'd like to turn me up,
And show the world,
'Cause I can talk the talk,
But this girl just wants to rock,
I'm individual,
I'm not like anyone...
When I was a little girl, my mom always told me to reach for the stars.
And I tried. I wasn't much like the other little girls who wanted to be princesses or ballerinas, though. Those things really didn't make much sense to me anyway. So a princess got frilly dresses and got married to a handsome prince; big deal. My plain dress was good enough for me and just because someone married a good-looking boy didn't mean he loved them the way they wanted him to. So ballerinas could dance around in pink tights.
Wow. Dream big.
No, I wanted different things. My first big dream was to be a teacher. The idea of being able to know so much and being able to share it with other people was intriguing to the five-year-old me. I could know more than my big brothers, be smarter than mom, outwit daddy! All I could think of the power, the possibilities that could come with that. Sad, perhaps, that such a small child would be interested in power, but I was the youngest and the only girl out of three, making authority a tempting stranger.
Then I wanted to be an archaeologist. My brothers had sparked that idea when I was about six or seven. My parents had just recently decided to introduce us to Indiana Jones, but I had been too young to watch, so Buck and Luke got to watch while I pouted up in my room. When the movie was over they thundered upstairs and Buck told me all about it while I listened, moon-eyed. Oh, the adventures I could have if I had that job! I could be just like Indy, outsmarting booby traps and discovering ancient artifacts that no one had ever seen before...
Slowly, the interest in archeology transformed into one of similar form: paleontology. I remember staring up at the towering Tyrannosaurus skeleton at the museum and wondering what it must've been like to uncover such a massive beast. The idea that such a curious-looking creature could've died millions of years ago in the very spot I was standing in was mind-blowing.
But then mom and Buck died, and I wasn't interested in anything at all. I had been devastated. I'd lost both my heroes in a mere few seconds. Never again would my mother tell me to reach for those twinkling celestial beings. Never again would Buck tell me that he'd beat up any loser who told me I wasn't strong or smart enough.
I guess one could say my inspiration went with them. For the longest time, I simply looked up at those stars and cried because I didn't have anyone to tell me to stretch for them.
But then I realized something. I didn't need anyone to do that. I could do it for myself. I was my own person with hopes and dreams.
I can be glamorous,
Just like you see in all the magazines,
I can be cool as ice,
Or anything I wanna be...
“Um...wow.”
I smiled at Becca and twirled about, enjoying the feel of the clean new fabric of my homecoming dress against my skin. I usually didn't particularly like dressing up, but this was an exception. This was for my first real dance. The first time I'd been invited by a boy. And out of all boys it happened to be Nick Jonas.
I wanted to be beautiful for him, both because he deserved it and because I needed to know that I was capable of it. I was the sort of girl who had shame, who had a problem with showing off too much skin, and was sometimes made fun of by the boys or belittled by the girls because of it. The dress was not a bawdy or raunchy thing, but it was snug and came down a little more than I was used to.
Guessing from the look on Becca's face, it was a startling change for her too. “You like it?” I asked my friend eagerly.
Her shocked expression suddenly became doubtful, as if she wasn't sure how to answer. “It's...okay.”
Had it been any other day, I would've been heartbroken. For far too long I'd been dependent on her to validate me, but I didn't need to. Nick had shown me that a long time ago, and I couldn't have been more grateful to him. Plus, I kind of expected her to be somewhat apathetic; Nick and I had become an official pair and she still wanted him for the fame.
I didn't need her.
Who said, who said I can't be Superman?
I say, I say that I know I can,
Who said, who said I won't be President?
I say, I say you ain't seen nothing yet...
“So you really think you're gonna be able to just go off to college in South America?” Luke asked doubtfully, “I mean, what're you gonna say? 'Hey, Dad, I want to go to Chile for a couple of years. It's not like you'll miss me or anything.'”
I shrugged, not looking up from my Spanish homework. With practiced, fluid ease I scribbled out words in a language I had not been raised knowing. When I wrote or spoke in Spanish, words just came so easily. It was almost as if English should've been my second language. Why shouldn't I have been able to study Spanish even further by going to South America?
“He'll let me go,” I said confidently, placing the final comma and looking up and my brother with a small smile, “and even if he doesn't right away, I'll figure out a way to do it. He can't hold me down forever, ya' know.”
No one could.
Go on and make some noise,
Every girl has her choice,
To lead their own parade,
I do it my way!
“Hey, Paige?”
“What's on your mind, Izz?” I replied quickly, curiously glancing up into the big blue eyes of my best friend. It didn't take a particularly skilled shrink to tell that she was thinking hard about something. Her face was tight with both eyebrows lifted, nose slightly scrunched, lips pulled into a soft frown and eyes narrowed ever so slightly. She was even chewing on her lip.
“What did you tell Nick when you decided to leave for Chile?”
I couldn't help but feel a stab of sorrow at the very mention of that time in my life. I'd been so scared and poor Nick had been so heartbroken...it was an upsetting memory I liked to leave buried underneath the happier ones. “Ya' mean how I explained myself?” I asked, though it was really more of a statement than a question, “I just told him that I wanted to teach.”
“Do you think...do you think Joe's gonna understand if I tell him I'm going to Hawaii? For school, I mean.”
I smiled at her. Joe and Izzy had been a pair for longer than anyone could remember. “'Course. You guys have already survived one long separation, one more isn't going to hurt.”
“You sure?”
“Positive,” I replied, “if that's what you feel you need to do, he'll understand.”
I can be soft and sweet,
Or louder than the radio,
I can be sophisticated,
Or totally go out of control...
“I've missed you so much.”
His touch was so soothing after living thousands of miles apart for several months, but I can't help but feel as if something is missing. His voice was so soft and his words were so sweet, spoken deliciously close to my ear in a loving whisper, but I wanted to feel as if he was my friend and not just my lover. I smiled gently, his dark curly hair brushing against my cheeks. “I missed you too, Nick,” I murmured softly in reply, “but ya' know what else I missed?”
He chuckled. “What?”
“Our snowball fights.”
He laughed again, a little louder this time. He pulled back, lightly brushing his thumb against my cheek, a smile touching his velvet lips. “Same old Paige.”
Who said, who said I can't be Superman?
I say, I say that I know I can,
Who said, who said I'm not electrifying?
I say, I say...
“How come you and Dad never get along, sis?”
I sighed, knowing that I was in for another one of Luke's 'big brother' lectures. He had not been born the oldest and had in fact been the middle child, so he had never been as good as Buck was at being the advisor and bodyguard we younger siblings needed. Still, I couldn't help but admire him for trying.
“Because he treats me like a little girl still.” I answered bluntly, relaxing into the passenger seat of my brother's truck.
Dad had just recently tried to tell me that I couldn't see a certain young man with because he was simply too dangerous, but what he didn't know was that I'd fallen in love with the kid long before I'd even thought of saying anything. Mac and I...we'd been friends since we were children. It was impossible to tell us that we couldn't see one another.
It was foolish of him to think that he had some sort of hold on us.
Luke frowned sharply. He obviously didn't like the fact that I hadn't even had to think about my answer first. “You can't just do everything you want.”
I looked at him and cocked my head to one side, amused. Did he think himself intimidating using those words? If I had a nickel for every time I'd heard someone say that, I could've just bought my father's acceptance. “I can damn well try.”
There's no holding back,
Staying right on track,
'Cause you control the game,
So let 'em know your name,
No limitations on imagination,
Imagine that!
“One of these days,” my brother said in that same severe tone that drove me absolutely crazy, “you're gonna really get yourself hurt and you're gonna wish that you were a little more careful.”
“No,” I insisted, closing my eyes calmly, “I'm just gonna wish that I didn't have so many people trying to distract me in the first place.”
I could envision Luke pressing his lips together for a moment before he answered. “Point taken,” he mumbled in a defeated tone just as he pulled up to my childhood home's driveway and shutting off the car's engine, “just try not to fight with him this time, okay?”
“I can't promise anything,” I said, lazily opening my eyes, “but I can try.”
If he tried to bring me down again, I wasn't going to try and be meek about it this time.
Who said, who said I can't be worldwide?
I say, I say time is on my side,
Who said, who said I can't be ten feet tall?
I say, I say that I can have it all...
“What'cha thinkin' about, sweetheart?”
His tone was lazy and the circles his thumb was making on my cheek were lopsided and never-ending, not wanting to put too much work into the slow Saturday we'd spent on the couch. I didn't open my eyes, nor did I stir from my position on my side, completely content just to feel his strong arms around me and have his warm chest pressed gently to my shoulder blades. “My mom.” I answered softly, tightening the hold I had on his free hand ever so slightly.
Mac's ever-gentle lips found a sensitive area just behind my ear. “I'm right here if you need to talk.”
“Mm.” I acknowledged the sweet sentiment absently, not completely registering it because my mind was in a completely different place.
So I'd reached for the stars. I'd done what I wanted to do with my life, and I was glad for it. Sure, I'd run into a little hurt here and there, but ultimately, it had been worth it all to end up where I was, literally, right now.
I'd gone back after the early dream of being a teacher, found something I loved and discovered the best way to put them together. I couldn't think of anything better to do with my time then use my talent to instruct those who could very well end up loving it too.
I'd decided that the best way to do that was to go to school out of the country. I'd convinced my father to allow me to go, even though it took considerable effort. My choice had forced me to say goodbye to my first true love, even though it had hurt like Hell and even now I'm not quite sure how I managed to make it through.
But it had been worth it. I had earned my degree and was working as a 9th grade Spanish teacher in the high school I'd gone to when I was a kid. Though some of them clearly didn't want to be there, the smiles on the other kids' faces when they discovered something new made my heart soar with pride. Closing a door had opened a window to another. I'd earned my father's acceptance and married the young man I loved, and could think of no other person I'd rather spend my life with.
Mom, wherever you are, I hope you're proud.
Who said, who said I can't be Superman?
I say, I say that I know I can,
Who said, who said I won't be President?
I say, I say you ain't seen nothing yet,
You ain't seen nothing yet,
Whoa, yeah!
Who said?
Come on, yeah!
That's right!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
A/N: Erm...yeah. When I saw this one come up on the screen I gave an audible groan 'cause I really didn't want to have to write a songfic using it, but rather then put it off for later I just decided, "ah, the Hell with it. I'll just get it over with now." Sad, I know.
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