When what you want is what you can't have, you have to settle for less. Tell me, what's less than love?
I felt as though he owed me something. However, I’d never done anything for him. I’d never saved his life, I’d never looked after him when he was sick, I’d never granted him sexual favours. I had only ever had somewhat one-sided conversations with him, containing statements hiding questions and monosyllables hiding all the emotions in the world. I had only ever listened to his jokes and laughed even though not a single one of them was funny.
Still, I felt as though he owed me something. For stealing my heart, he owed me. I wanted something in return. What I had in mind was what I couldn’t have so I’d settle for anything he could give me. But no one pays off debts to those they don’t owe money to and he didn’t owe a single cent to me. I hadn’t done anything for him.
Until that summer.