Categories > Celebrities > My Chemical Romance > Hold me now, don't let me fa[i]ll.
Chapter Four- A girl with kaleidoscope eyes.
Gerard P.O.V
I woke up slowly, my eyes crusty with sleep, probably bloodshot from the previous night's "activities", and vengefully resisting the motion of opening them. When they finally opened, I realised I could'nt remember where I was precisely. This not being a first-time occurrence I remained motionless and mellow, and as the sun crept in through the window to my right, I could finally see where I was. Looking down I realised I had slept in a spotted arm-chair in the Bert's living room, across from me, Zephyr and Frank were stretched out on a lounge-chair, him seated, his head lolling back onto the top of the couch, her head resting in his lap, looking comfortable with his arm resting on her back. Glancing along the couch, I saw the jacket that I had been wearing thrown over her legs and remembered the night before.
Flashback Sequence
The night was finally taking its effect on Zephyr, Maddy, Mikey and Frank had all fallen asleep an hour or two ago, but Zephyr had stayed on, just dancing with Bert, keeping her distance from me to avoid conversation; now as they had returned to their seats around the table she had fallen asleep on Bert's shoulder. As he started dozing off, I picked her up and carried her over to the lounge where Frank was asleep; laying her down with her head on Frank's lap she stirred, murmering "My dress is too short to lay down" attempting to sit up with her eyes closed. "Shh" I said quietly, pushing her back down gently "just let me handle it." I pulled off my jacket and lay it over her legs, covering our little secret; and she was already back asleep. "Just let me handle everything" I murmered, and as I pushed her hair out of her face, the raven hair that I had believed belonged to her came off, and I realised it was a wig and that her real hair was shorter than mine and blonde, I smiled, she was cute as a blonde.
End Flashback
The sun that had peeked through the window was now playing through the glass, throwing rainbows over Zephyr's eyes, as she smiled in her sleep, I wondered what sort of daemons had haunted this girl in her past, what sort of ugliness hid in her soul, that had caused her to turn a blade upon herself, tearing open her skin in an attempt to rid herself of these memories. I wondered how much she hid with her pretty face. I looked over at Frank and wondered what he had gotten himself into, I wondered if he could handle her pain, I wondered if she didn't want anyone to deal with it. Frank began to open his eyes, blinking lightly, and looking around to see where he was, as he remembered, his eyes focused on me and he whispered "Good Morning". He started getting up, cradling Zephyr's head in his hands as not to wake her up, once he was standing he lay her hand back down on the lounge and walked over to me "You want some coffee?" he asked "I'm going to go get some."
"Yeah, sure" I said "I wouldn't mind some"
He walked out of the living room and into the hall, walking out the front door, and shutting it behind him. With the shut of the door Zephyr's eyes snapped open, looking around anxiously for a moment before she saw me and realised where she had fallen asleep. She sat up slowly, running her fingers through her hair, and whispered "Morning Gerard" with her voice still husky from sleep.
"Morning" I replied moving to sit next to her on the lounge, "So are we going to talk about it?" I asked, referring to what I had seen the night before.
A pained look came across her face and her eyes darted around nervously "Look, I really don't think we have to talk about it, it was a long time ago, and really it doesn't matter, so if you would please not tell anyone what you, saw things would work out much better. Please." she begged in a low tone.
I looked at her, and saw pain flashing across her eyes, and knew I couldn't hurt her any more, whether it be by forcing her to talk abut it, or telling someone else. "Your secret's safe with me." She opened her mouth to say something but the closing of the front door alerted us of the return of Frank and she stopped herself.
"Good Morning" called out Frank, his voice preceding him as he walked into the living room and smiled at us both, handing me my coffee and giving Zephyr a kiss on the cheek "I'm going to see if I can find some food in this kitchen, though Bert is such a slob that I doubt I will" his voice trailing off as he walked out of the room.
"I'll always be here to talk" I whispered quietly.
"There are some things you don't want to know, Gerard." She replied, getting up and walking outside. I watched her through the front window and noticed her hand shaking as she lit her cigarette, I wondered if our conversation had rattled her that much, and what memories it had dragged back into her mind.
Zephyr P.O.V
I took a deep breath as I rested my hand on the doorknob of Bert's house, preparing to walk back inside, twisting the doorknob, I strode back in, walking past Gerard in the living room and into the kitchen where Frank was cooking eggs in a frying pan. I took a seat at the bench next to the stove and watched him as he danced around, grabbing a spatula and various other utensils out of drawers and using them to make breakfast. He was so cute and carefree, he turned on the radio and 'No sleep till Brooklyn' by the Beastie Boys blasted out, he turned it up and began singing along, I was wondering how anyone could be sleeping through this when Mikey, Maddy and Bert all stumbled into the room, followed closely by Gerard. They all sat down at the dining room table, Bert resting his head on it, Maddy resting hers on Mikey's shoulder, him ontop of hers. Bert groaned out "Foood", and they all grumbled nonsense that sounded like agreements. Frank winked at me and pronounced "Nothing like a little Beastie Boys to get you up and moving early in the afternoon." They all moaned and held their heads/ears at his loud tone and Gerard, Frank and I just laughed, Frank lay down a plate of eggs and some plates and they all dug in. I walked over to the fridge and pulled out some orange juice, poured myself a glass, and brought it over to the table placing it down. Frank pulled out the chair next to him, motioning for me to sit down, I rested indian-style upon the wicker chair, resting my head on Frank's shoulder, watching Bert, Gerard and Frank eat; apparently Mikey and Maddy were too naueseated to even look at the eggs, both of them looking as though they were drifting in and out of sleep, their eyes closed, their breaths long and deep.
Once the boys were finished eating Frank stood up and began to clear the things away, I immediatley stood up and took the plates from his hands "Oh, no you don't" I told him "The cook never cleans, go watch T.V or something" he began to protest but I fixed him with a stare and he laughed, kissed my forehead and shook Mikey and Maddy awake, dragging them into the living room. Bert had fallen asleep again, his head resting on the table, so Gerard stood up and began to help me clear things away. We carried the things back up to the kitchen and I told him "You don't have to help you know, go watch T.V with the others." But he shook his head and kept helping, scraping the plates off into the bin as I ran some washing up water. I began washing up, and he began to dry, putting things away as he went, he seemed to know his way around Bert's kitchen as well as, if not better than Frank.
"What did you mean before?" He asked, turning to me with his concerned eyes.
"What did I mean before when?" I replied, continuing to wash up the cutlery.
"When you said there are some things you don't want to know?" he persisted, walking over to the sink and watching me wash, trying to catch and hold my gaze; but I kept my eyes down towards the water.
"Gerard, how did you get hooked on ecstacy?" I shot back in a low tone. He looked away and mumbled, rubbing his neck and then looking back frowning, "How did you know what I was on?" he asked curiously.
"I've been around long enough to know how people look when they're on something. The point is I'm sure thats not a very pretty story either, but whatever went down you probably like to keep to yourself, and I know how you feel. And there are things that you don't want to know Gerard, I'm an ugly person. An ugly soul, you don't want to come deep enough to find that out. Now, will you drop it?" I hissed the last sentence defensively.
"Fine, but I can't believe your an ugly soul" he whispered.
I turned around to argue that point but he had left the room. I finished the washing up and walked into the living room, Frank, Maddy and Mikey were all watching The Simpsons, but Gerard was no-where in sight. "Um, Frank, do you mind giving me a lift home now?" I asked tentatively, "I'm just really tired sorry"
"No, no, it's fine" he began, jumping to his feet, "Maddy would you like to go home now too?" he turned to ask her.
"I can give you a lift home later, if you like?" Mikey offered quietly.
"Thanks" Maddy said smiling at him gratefully and a little flirtatiously "If your right to go home alone I'll just stay a little longer." She said, twisting her head up to talk to me from the lounge.
"Yep, that's fine, see you when you get home hun, can you tell Bert thanks for having us when he wakes up?"
Maddy nodded, turning her attention back to the television.
I walked over to the table to grab my bag, shoes and phone, frowning as I saw it out on the table instead of inside my bag where I had left it, I slipped it back inside, and walked over to the front door, where Frank was waiting with keys in his hands.
"Bye Mikey" I called out.
"Later" he replied, his attention turned to the tv.
We walked out the door and Frank gave me a lift home in the car they had picked us up in last night. We rode silently, both tired and listening to the radio, singing along to songs we knew; once we reached my house I thanked him for the night and the lift home, apologising for leaving so early, reassuring him that I had a great time.
"I had a great time too, Zephyr" he told me "It's nice to wake up to you in the morning."
I blushed and threw my glance downwards, he pulled my head up by my chin and kissed me lightly on the lips.
Dazed as he let go I stuttered out "Th-thankyou" and hopped out of the car, walking up my lawn and pulling a key out from under our gnome, turning to wave shyly as he drove away, letting myself into the house.
I walked up the stairs and into my room, getting into my pyjamas and sitting on my bed, grabbing my phone out of my bag to turn off the alarm, lighting up the screen I realised someone had left my phone in the create message screen, it read "I saved my number in your phone, talk to me, I'm uglier than you might think, your pretty beautiful to me xo Gee"
I exited the screen, turning off my alarm and lying back on my bed, sighing as I wondered what I was going to do about him, my life was not a pleasant topic. I pulled the covers over myself and fell asleep wondering how ugly Gerard could really be in comparison to me.
Gerard P.O.V
I woke up slowly, my eyes crusty with sleep, probably bloodshot from the previous night's "activities", and vengefully resisting the motion of opening them. When they finally opened, I realised I could'nt remember where I was precisely. This not being a first-time occurrence I remained motionless and mellow, and as the sun crept in through the window to my right, I could finally see where I was. Looking down I realised I had slept in a spotted arm-chair in the Bert's living room, across from me, Zephyr and Frank were stretched out on a lounge-chair, him seated, his head lolling back onto the top of the couch, her head resting in his lap, looking comfortable with his arm resting on her back. Glancing along the couch, I saw the jacket that I had been wearing thrown over her legs and remembered the night before.
Flashback Sequence
The night was finally taking its effect on Zephyr, Maddy, Mikey and Frank had all fallen asleep an hour or two ago, but Zephyr had stayed on, just dancing with Bert, keeping her distance from me to avoid conversation; now as they had returned to their seats around the table she had fallen asleep on Bert's shoulder. As he started dozing off, I picked her up and carried her over to the lounge where Frank was asleep; laying her down with her head on Frank's lap she stirred, murmering "My dress is too short to lay down" attempting to sit up with her eyes closed. "Shh" I said quietly, pushing her back down gently "just let me handle it." I pulled off my jacket and lay it over her legs, covering our little secret; and she was already back asleep. "Just let me handle everything" I murmered, and as I pushed her hair out of her face, the raven hair that I had believed belonged to her came off, and I realised it was a wig and that her real hair was shorter than mine and blonde, I smiled, she was cute as a blonde.
End Flashback
The sun that had peeked through the window was now playing through the glass, throwing rainbows over Zephyr's eyes, as she smiled in her sleep, I wondered what sort of daemons had haunted this girl in her past, what sort of ugliness hid in her soul, that had caused her to turn a blade upon herself, tearing open her skin in an attempt to rid herself of these memories. I wondered how much she hid with her pretty face. I looked over at Frank and wondered what he had gotten himself into, I wondered if he could handle her pain, I wondered if she didn't want anyone to deal with it. Frank began to open his eyes, blinking lightly, and looking around to see where he was, as he remembered, his eyes focused on me and he whispered "Good Morning". He started getting up, cradling Zephyr's head in his hands as not to wake her up, once he was standing he lay her hand back down on the lounge and walked over to me "You want some coffee?" he asked "I'm going to go get some."
"Yeah, sure" I said "I wouldn't mind some"
He walked out of the living room and into the hall, walking out the front door, and shutting it behind him. With the shut of the door Zephyr's eyes snapped open, looking around anxiously for a moment before she saw me and realised where she had fallen asleep. She sat up slowly, running her fingers through her hair, and whispered "Morning Gerard" with her voice still husky from sleep.
"Morning" I replied moving to sit next to her on the lounge, "So are we going to talk about it?" I asked, referring to what I had seen the night before.
A pained look came across her face and her eyes darted around nervously "Look, I really don't think we have to talk about it, it was a long time ago, and really it doesn't matter, so if you would please not tell anyone what you, saw things would work out much better. Please." she begged in a low tone.
I looked at her, and saw pain flashing across her eyes, and knew I couldn't hurt her any more, whether it be by forcing her to talk abut it, or telling someone else. "Your secret's safe with me." She opened her mouth to say something but the closing of the front door alerted us of the return of Frank and she stopped herself.
"Good Morning" called out Frank, his voice preceding him as he walked into the living room and smiled at us both, handing me my coffee and giving Zephyr a kiss on the cheek "I'm going to see if I can find some food in this kitchen, though Bert is such a slob that I doubt I will" his voice trailing off as he walked out of the room.
"I'll always be here to talk" I whispered quietly.
"There are some things you don't want to know, Gerard." She replied, getting up and walking outside. I watched her through the front window and noticed her hand shaking as she lit her cigarette, I wondered if our conversation had rattled her that much, and what memories it had dragged back into her mind.
Zephyr P.O.V
I took a deep breath as I rested my hand on the doorknob of Bert's house, preparing to walk back inside, twisting the doorknob, I strode back in, walking past Gerard in the living room and into the kitchen where Frank was cooking eggs in a frying pan. I took a seat at the bench next to the stove and watched him as he danced around, grabbing a spatula and various other utensils out of drawers and using them to make breakfast. He was so cute and carefree, he turned on the radio and 'No sleep till Brooklyn' by the Beastie Boys blasted out, he turned it up and began singing along, I was wondering how anyone could be sleeping through this when Mikey, Maddy and Bert all stumbled into the room, followed closely by Gerard. They all sat down at the dining room table, Bert resting his head on it, Maddy resting hers on Mikey's shoulder, him ontop of hers. Bert groaned out "Foood", and they all grumbled nonsense that sounded like agreements. Frank winked at me and pronounced "Nothing like a little Beastie Boys to get you up and moving early in the afternoon." They all moaned and held their heads/ears at his loud tone and Gerard, Frank and I just laughed, Frank lay down a plate of eggs and some plates and they all dug in. I walked over to the fridge and pulled out some orange juice, poured myself a glass, and brought it over to the table placing it down. Frank pulled out the chair next to him, motioning for me to sit down, I rested indian-style upon the wicker chair, resting my head on Frank's shoulder, watching Bert, Gerard and Frank eat; apparently Mikey and Maddy were too naueseated to even look at the eggs, both of them looking as though they were drifting in and out of sleep, their eyes closed, their breaths long and deep.
Once the boys were finished eating Frank stood up and began to clear the things away, I immediatley stood up and took the plates from his hands "Oh, no you don't" I told him "The cook never cleans, go watch T.V or something" he began to protest but I fixed him with a stare and he laughed, kissed my forehead and shook Mikey and Maddy awake, dragging them into the living room. Bert had fallen asleep again, his head resting on the table, so Gerard stood up and began to help me clear things away. We carried the things back up to the kitchen and I told him "You don't have to help you know, go watch T.V with the others." But he shook his head and kept helping, scraping the plates off into the bin as I ran some washing up water. I began washing up, and he began to dry, putting things away as he went, he seemed to know his way around Bert's kitchen as well as, if not better than Frank.
"What did you mean before?" He asked, turning to me with his concerned eyes.
"What did I mean before when?" I replied, continuing to wash up the cutlery.
"When you said there are some things you don't want to know?" he persisted, walking over to the sink and watching me wash, trying to catch and hold my gaze; but I kept my eyes down towards the water.
"Gerard, how did you get hooked on ecstacy?" I shot back in a low tone. He looked away and mumbled, rubbing his neck and then looking back frowning, "How did you know what I was on?" he asked curiously.
"I've been around long enough to know how people look when they're on something. The point is I'm sure thats not a very pretty story either, but whatever went down you probably like to keep to yourself, and I know how you feel. And there are things that you don't want to know Gerard, I'm an ugly person. An ugly soul, you don't want to come deep enough to find that out. Now, will you drop it?" I hissed the last sentence defensively.
"Fine, but I can't believe your an ugly soul" he whispered.
I turned around to argue that point but he had left the room. I finished the washing up and walked into the living room, Frank, Maddy and Mikey were all watching The Simpsons, but Gerard was no-where in sight. "Um, Frank, do you mind giving me a lift home now?" I asked tentatively, "I'm just really tired sorry"
"No, no, it's fine" he began, jumping to his feet, "Maddy would you like to go home now too?" he turned to ask her.
"I can give you a lift home later, if you like?" Mikey offered quietly.
"Thanks" Maddy said smiling at him gratefully and a little flirtatiously "If your right to go home alone I'll just stay a little longer." She said, twisting her head up to talk to me from the lounge.
"Yep, that's fine, see you when you get home hun, can you tell Bert thanks for having us when he wakes up?"
Maddy nodded, turning her attention back to the television.
I walked over to the table to grab my bag, shoes and phone, frowning as I saw it out on the table instead of inside my bag where I had left it, I slipped it back inside, and walked over to the front door, where Frank was waiting with keys in his hands.
"Bye Mikey" I called out.
"Later" he replied, his attention turned to the tv.
We walked out the door and Frank gave me a lift home in the car they had picked us up in last night. We rode silently, both tired and listening to the radio, singing along to songs we knew; once we reached my house I thanked him for the night and the lift home, apologising for leaving so early, reassuring him that I had a great time.
"I had a great time too, Zephyr" he told me "It's nice to wake up to you in the morning."
I blushed and threw my glance downwards, he pulled my head up by my chin and kissed me lightly on the lips.
Dazed as he let go I stuttered out "Th-thankyou" and hopped out of the car, walking up my lawn and pulling a key out from under our gnome, turning to wave shyly as he drove away, letting myself into the house.
I walked up the stairs and into my room, getting into my pyjamas and sitting on my bed, grabbing my phone out of my bag to turn off the alarm, lighting up the screen I realised someone had left my phone in the create message screen, it read "I saved my number in your phone, talk to me, I'm uglier than you might think, your pretty beautiful to me xo Gee"
I exited the screen, turning off my alarm and lying back on my bed, sighing as I wondered what I was going to do about him, my life was not a pleasant topic. I pulled the covers over myself and fell asleep wondering how ugly Gerard could really be in comparison to me.
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