Categories > Original > Poetry0 Reviews
"But in my arms, she was always, 'Lolita'"
is a picture from when i was about five.
i'm posing in a red sweater, looking quite pleased.
i'm not even sure why i am. for the sake of memories, i guess.
that child does not even know that he will be.
knowing nothing of the world, ignorance-
but appropriate ignorance.
not to know of the throbbing heartbreak,
not to know of the constant disorientation,
always keep your mouth shut,
loose lips sink ships
ships carry people,
and people will drown.
i am the captain,
i try to control the ship to the port:
but none of the passengers seem to have any sufficent respect
naval training means nothing
they are discordial.
i have crashed into iceburgs before.
i know now to steer around them, but they tell me:
You don't know what you're talking about.
that's a fucking lie.
they are not ABOVE the iceburg.
you can't work around it.
But people seem to think otherwise.
fuck these fucking god damn human emotions
fuck the fucking fuckers
fuck caring. i am so beyond caring.
How am I supposed to operate,
How am I supposed to inform the first mate:
when everyone thinks I'm senile anyway?
i'll just let them make their own mistakes.
[lola, lolita, my little lolita]
They'll soon see.
the older ones will release love is blind.
But age is all part of the catarax.
['he'll just say no if he feels uncomfortable']
MATURITY IS AN ILLUSION.
there are two types, really. quiltys and humberts.
Hmberts are in complete and utter self-loathing and aware of their self-repulsion.
Quilties think they can fuck around with these things, and move on.
humberts lost something once and try forever to get it back.
quilties keep losing, but don't understand the object in which they are losing.
Humberts try to achieve love ['tell me, tell me, everything you claim']
Quilties just will move on for a good ['march out of my life'] for a good fuck.
but the Lolitas.
Beauty is of their pivital existance.
Beauty will run out. You'll realize you fucked it up yourself.
Should've listened to Humbert.
but it felt so wrong, Humbert was of family, of friends, of goodness.
They'll realize their mistakes in their own sexual frustrations,
After Quilties and Humberts:
but then where will you end up?
Because Quilties are the ones who die out, and Humberts still want to make things right.
Lolitas, you'll never learn.