(#) fruit_addict 2007-03-19Hey great chapter. I liked how you gradually introduced the characters and their appearance. Gave a bit of suspence. There were a few spelling mistakes and grammer/wording errors though. In one of the character's names some of the time it had two 'g's and others it only had one. Also, I doubt this is what you meant but if you did mean the Hawaii island when you said, 'kawaii' then it is spelt wrong.
Author's responseIt's actually "kawaii" meaning "cute" in Japanese. It's a term commonly used by American anime fans as well.
Sign up to review this story.