Categories > Books > Harry Potter > Fate's Revenge

Chapter 1

by lancelot47 16 Reviews

After the death of her parents and her beloved Uncle Harry, Fate sends Rose Weasley back in time to put right the wrongs committed on Harry and Hermione.

Category: Harry Potter - Rating: PG-13 - Genres: Drama - Characters: Harry,Hermione - Warnings: [!!!] [?] - Published: 2009/03/17 - Updated: 2009/05/15 - 7406 words

Reviews

  • Fate's Revenge

    (#) mathiasgranger 2009-03-17 04:42:30 PM

    Interesting premise for a story, I look forward to future installments of this one.

    Thanks for writing,
    Matt

    Author's response

    Hello Mathiasgranger,
    Thanks for the review.
    Regards
    Lancelot47
  • Fate's Revenge

    (#) jaskolefey 2009-03-17 07:06:21 PM

    A very interesting 1st chapter i can't wait to read more

    Author's response

    Thanks for the review,
    Regards,
    Lancelot47
  • Fate's Revenge

    (#) thekev 2009-03-17 09:02:25 PM

    great chapter i can't wait to see where you take it

    Author's response

    Thanks for the review,
    Regards,
    Lancelot47
  • Fate's Revenge

    (#) biged78 2009-03-17 09:53:45 PM

    Very promising start. I await your next chapter.

    Author's response

    Thanks for the review,
    Regards,
    Lancelot47
  • Fate's Revenge

    (#) whatareyouevensaying 2009-03-17 11:14:11 PM

    This is an excellent start. I've seen a couple of similar ideas, but yours is the most well-developed...at least this early. On to the corrections and criticisms.

    Ron and Hermione's son is named Hugo, not Hugh.

    "Rose gasped in shock as she realised that her brother objectified women."

    Really? Please tell me that you don't honestly believe that. Please tell me that it's only Rose's depressed first reaction, because I think that's outrageous. If you really do believe that, then I'd like the opportunity to change your mind.

    At any rate, it's an excellent start, and I'm really excited to read more.

    Author's response

    Hello whatareyouevensaying.

    First of all thanks for the review.
    Sorry about the Hugh/Hugo thing, Hugh is a character in DTR and the typo slipped through the beta process. My fault, I will change it when posting the second chapter.

    We the readers know very little about any of the children from the epilogue, therefore they are blank slates. And the fanfiction author is free to mold the character to fit the story they are creating.
    In this story Hugo is based on George Best, the footballer from England who played in the seventies. He was very skilled and had a lot of Lady friends.

    I will leave it up to the reader on how they view the line quoted in your review.

    Most adolescent males have posters up on their walls, of women, cars, sport etc.

    As the story starts in '86 in the next chapter it is unlikely that Hugo will crop up again.

    I am sorry if that segment of the story offended.

    Your take that Rose is depressed is accurate so I would not take what she says first as her true thoughts. In the first chapter her carefully constructed life has fallen apart.

    Regards
    Lancelot47
  • Fate's Revenge

    (#) pi3142 2009-03-18 04:45:00 AM

    Keep it up - doing very well.

    Author's response

    Hello,
    Thanks for the comments,
    Regards,
    Lancelot47
  • Fate's Revenge

    (#) Uncle_Buck 2009-03-18 08:26:27 AM

    Good start clear delivery I only have one request. Please do not use single quotes. I use an text to verbal interpreter that makes 'yes' into IRS and some other things as splitting words with / . awaiting your continued work jerome aka Uncle_Buck
  • Fate's Revenge

    (#) Cateagle 2009-03-18 09:11:31 AM

    Well, it's quite an attention-grabbing start to your story. I do feel sorry for Rose, though; finding out that she was one of the few good parts of her parents' marriage has to have hurt. All things considered, I'm not sure I can at all blame Hermione for her reaction; it's all too human given the situation. I'll be looking forward to the next several chapters as she endeavors to handle the task fate's set her.

    Author's response

    Hello,
    Thanks for the comments,
    I agree Rose has received a shit deal from Fate.
    Regards,
    Lancelot47
  • Fate's Revenge

    (#) Immortal7 2009-03-18 09:23:25 AM

    this is different, but different is good in cases like this. I looking forward to the next installments before I pass a complete review. Yet the story is off to a good start.

    Author's response

    Hello,
    Thanks for the comments,
    I hope you enjoy later installments.
    Regards,
    Lancelot47
  • Fate's Revenge

    (#) LuLingQi 2009-03-18 10:38:06 AM

    I like the story and where your going accept the motivation part. Living only another 25 years if she succeeds is not really a motivation that cuts her life by 2/3. Yes I understand she "sort of committed suicide" but if she correct the problem and sees her mother and uncle happy then dieing a short life is just a slap in the face.

    Author's response

    Hello,
    Thanks for the comments,
    Rose getting a shit deal off of Fate is part of the plot.
    As Fate see's it Rose must be punished for sins of her parents.
    And as life teaches use plans never run smoothly.
    Regards,
    Lancelot47

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