Categories > Anime/Manga > Yu Yu Hakusho

Tell That Mick He Just Made My List of Things to Do Today

by SereneShadow 0 Reviews

Hiei and Kili used to be together. But then Kili cheated, and Hiei realized that he's better off alone anyhow.

Category: Yu Yu Hakusho - Rating: R - Genres: Angst,Drama - Characters: Hiei - Warnings: [X] - Published: 2009/09/14 - Updated: 2009/09/15 - 1874 words - Complete

Tell That Mick He Just Made My List of Things to Do Today

The line went dead, and a tone sounded. Hiei smirked, hanging up the pay phone. She was too stubborn for her own good. She would never stop being an idiot.

He exited the phone booth, walking a little ways down the street until he stood directly in front of her apartment, where the curtains were, as always, open. She stood in front of the window, her hair lank and lifeless, her posture hopeless, and her body thin as a wafer cracker.

He watched for a minute, knowing she was wearing only a dirty sports bra and jeans. He couldn't see her, but he knew. She was a creature of habit, one whose habits he'd gotten to know well. She wore stuff like that to relax. Though, Hiei couldn't really tell when she was relaxed and when she wasn't, because she pretty much didn't give a damn about anything.

She reached over, still in front of the window, her torso bent. She pulled a lighter from her right jean pocket. Hiei found himself smirking again.

Light that smoke, yeah one
For giving up on me...


She had given up on him.[1] On pretty much everything, but mostly, had given up on herself. "I don't care anymore, Hiei. I just don't care," she'd said, with beer and coffee stained teeth, her voice with a slight rasp from the years of darkened lungs. He had always known her to smoke.

It was, perhaps, one of the reasons they fought. Hiei had, at a time, thought she did care, but he had quickly been proven wrong. It was something he'd chosen to ignore for a long time. Too long.
She hadn't cared about him, and he honestly hadn't cared about her.

And one just ‘cause they'll kill you
Sooner than my expectations.


Did he want her dead? The childish part of him that wanted her back and always would, said yes. But on the whole, no. Not truthfully. His passion for her had not died unexpectedly, but wasted away after so long with someone who didn't give a damn. He had started not to give a damn. That was something he couldn't stand.

And then, of course, had come the hard stuff. The drugs. The arrests on prostitution for drug money. And the blow job of his then-best friend, who was probably in the apartment, either sniffing cocaine off the table or knocking back a few too early in the morning. Hiei himself had come out of shit situations. He'd grown up in poverty, surrounded by people who didn't care. And he hadn't enjoyed it. So he didn't want her dead, because he didn't really want anything from her. He, ironically, didn't care.

To my favorite liar, to my favorite scar:
I could have died with you.


There were, as always, battle wounds. Scars he wouldn't recover from. But Hiei had had enough stuff to deal with, and he didn't want extra pressure where it wasn't necessary.

And he didn't really feel much pain at all. He wasn't miserable, praying she would take him back or even missing their completely sex-based life together. When he closed his eyes and the images surrounding him faded away, there would always be those great memories.

If (and he could hardly bring himself to believe this) there had been something meaningful behind her actions, or his, he'd certainly missed it. They had been together for one reason and one reason only.

And, if he ever did miss her, if he ever, by some twist of fate, wanted her back, then he'd have those times to remember. Being in the heat, in the dark, in the moment with someone who, granted, he didn't love, but also someone he knew felt, in the least, attracted to him, was priceless.

It was something no hooker or slut could just radiate from their pores the way she did; the way she kept those golden kisses trailing down his neck. Since he'd spent most of his life unloved and uncared for, in every sense of the words, that sort of feeling was new and certainly attention-getting.

She'd lied to him. There was no denying. She'd lied and cheated and stolen, if nothing else, his time. But, he'd had time to waste. And he would have died with her, if she'd kept trailing those magic kisses down his neck.

I hope you choke
On those words, that kiss, that bottle
Confess...


And he'd always have his pride. But, she had not given it to him easily. She had denied for the longest time, forever, and if it wasn't for Kurama coming forward to express his anger with Hiei, she probably never would have admitted it. And sometimes, he did wish she had choked and fallen on the rug at his feet that very second.

She'd been sitting in her chair, had jumped up when he arrived, Kurama staring out the window. He'd looked from one to the other, putting what he'd known together all along.

There hadn't really been mercy in her eyes, either. Something he hadn't been lucky to easily forget. She had looked like he deserved it, that he had been asking for it. She'd sat there, looking so very lazy and stupid and everything he'd made an effort to escape, with her legs open in her jeans, a bottle propped between them, still half-full.

She had looked like a poor slut. Perhaps even a dyke-like slut, with her wifebeater and big jeans. She'd called Kurama over, grabbed him and kissed him like she'd die without it. Hiei had just stood there, dumbfounded.

And then, she'd said those words he'd kept repeating with a smile on his face, as if it had been the funniest thing in the world. Because it was. It was ridiculous, and most of the post-breakup angst, most of the anger and hate and misery that people went through, was completely demolished by it.

"Hiei. I've been seeing someone else."

He'd felt like screaming, "NO FUCKING SHIT, YOU SKANK!" But, he'd managed only a chuckle before walking out the door, quite promptly, with an "I wish the two of you the best life." It had only been a small bit of bitter, very good for someone who'd been through what he had.

Now ask yourself
Yeah, out on the inside
Said I loved you but I lied.


He'd done it, like any other lovesick fool. But, he hadn't really been lovesick. If anything, he'd been horny. He had just liked being able to say it to someone who wouldn't call him on it. And, of course, he'd been lying.

With that thought on his mind, his eyes swept her body, watching the curves that he'd traced with his own hand. He couldn't pretend to be the victim. He couldn't pretend to be the boyfriend whose heart had been crushed and beaten in. Because he'd done nearly as much to her. Lied. Told her just what she had wanted to hear. But, he had meant no harm. It was all in the name of love!

Well, to be precise, it was all in the name of sex. Great sex. That was something they'd been good at.

Let's play this game
Called When You Catch Fire
I wouldn't piss to put you out.


Would he? He wanted to say yes. But the thought of her, kicking and screaming, the flames tearing off her wifebeater and stupid baggy jeans and then peeling through her skin and whipping through her hair as she writhed on the ground...it made him almost laugh.

It was kind of funny. Maybe a bit sick to someone on the outside, but, well, it wasn't as if he'd set her on fire. The concept wasn't so dark, but chuckle-worthy. It wasn't as if she'd piss to put him out either.

Stop burning bridges
And drive off of them
So I can forget about you...


He did want to forget. But, not forget her, so much as forget the time he'd wasted dealing with her shit. The time he'd had to spend getting bail money and convincing drug addicts and sellers not to pound her face in. The bad times with her steeply outweighed the good, that was true.

So bury me in memory
His smile's your rope
So wrap it tight around your throat.


She'd forget him. It wasn't a question of whether she would or not, but how long it would take, and how much alcohol and smokes. Probably not too many; the best of their times together she had been doped up anyway, of her own accord. Hiei was just the tiniest bit disappointed that she wouldn't remember the most fun they'd had. They were the best memories he had.

But then again, she had Kurama now. Hiei wasn't really angry at Kurama either; he hadn't expected much out of him. And when Kurama smiled at her, it would choke her. Kurama wasn't the same. He felt things, he wanted to be with people he loved and who loved him. She would probably never love him. She'd be good until things got too jaded, then she'd split them up like she had done with Hiei. Well, technically, the breakup had been Hiei's move. But she'd brought it on.

*

Hours later, Hiei was in his own apartment, which was years ahead of hers and miles cleaner. He flopped on the couch, tired from a day's work and the mental once-over on his lunch break, during which he'd called her just to mock her. Why not? He'd had the chance, and taken it. Was it worth it? Probably. He grabbed the remote from the side table and turned on his TV, automatically and somewhat unenthusiastically turning to the evening news.

On the drive home
Joke about the kid you used to see and his jealousy.
Breaking hearts has never looked so cool
As when you wrap your car around a tree
Your makeup looks so good next to his teeth.


Breaking news came to the reporter on a slip of white paper, and was promptly read. "There has been a terrible accident on road 41. Police are urging citizens to stay away from the accident area, as it is bound to cause pile-ups, and is otherwise a grisly sight."

Let's play this game
Called 'When You Catch Fire'
I wouldn't piss to put you out.
Stop burning bridges
And drive off of them
So I can forget about you
So bury me in memory
His smile's your rope
So wrap it tight around your throat.


The reporter went on to show pictures of the car, which had slammed into a tree. Hiei instantly recognized the make, and quickly after the license plate was shown, owner of the car. He half gasped, half chuckled. It was her car. And, to be honest...he didn't much give a damn.

So bury me in memory
His smile's your rope
So wrap it tight around your throat.
So bury me in memory
Around your throat.


[1] Unlike many songfictions, this one actually interacts with the lyrics, so if you skip them and then you don't know what Hiei's talking about, then that explains it.
Log in to rate and review this story

Log in!




Register Lost password

Filter

You won't see stories with a lower score when you browse or search. Log in to adjust filter.
0

 

Featured Story

Site Stats

  • Authors: 608040
  • Stories: 40296

Recent Stories