FicWad

Love Artificially

‘So this is your choice?’ The shop manager looks clearly baffled.

‘You have a problem with that?’ Tsubasa answers bitterly.

‘Well, he’s not all-guy,’ Salesman Jin defends weakly, ‘inside, it's all female emotions and mental capabilities - our latest Femme Fatale Deluxe XP.’

‘Wow... that's double whammy, if you ask me,’ the manager’s furrowed brows intensify.

‘It’s just that our esteemed customer here has unique tastes. Besides we’re not here to judge. We here to fulfill their fantasies, whatever they may be.’ Jin gently hushes the manager and quickly shoves him aside.

‘Fantasies? More like nightmare,’ Tsubasa retorts under his breath.

‘Nightmare? You get nightmares? Have no fear, Takki’s here,’ the humanoid robot next to him beams triumphantly.

Since the craze for robot lovers started not too long ago, Tsubasa has been feeling the heat from his friends to get one himself. They’ve been raving non-stop about their human-like features, their docile mannerism and what they can do in and out of bed. These human dolls sound like the best thing since sliced bread. So Tsubasa never expects to be bringing home a walking and talking nightmare, in the form a girly-looking male doll.

Tsubasa has no objection against effeminate lover robots, just as long as they don't threaten his sense of narcissism. But Takki's flawless milky skin, delicate angel-like features, and silky, honey coloured mane do just that, much to his chagrin.

Nevertheless, in order to help cover up Salesman Jin's horrendous mistake, Tsubasa's now stuck with safekeeping the defective toy until the mix-up is sorted out. If only the airhead didn’t get his order mixed up, he would finally be getting laid tonight. It’s not that he has difficulty in that department but he likes his sex with no strings attached. A robot that operates at his beck and call is more than he can handle.

‘So this is my new home?’ Takki looks around excitedly, hands almost clapping. Tsubasa cringes at the sight. ‘I love it!’

‘You’ve been loving everything on our way home, from the homeless guy on the street to the parking metre. Is there anything you don’t love?’

‘Jealous, aren’t we? Relax, I promise not to love anything more than you,’ Takki winks his long lashes and blows an air kiss in the direction of an almost convulsing Tsubasa.

Although Tsubasa does his utmost best to avoid Takki, it doesn’t help that he’s a fashion designer who works from home. And as if living in a nightmare is not bad enough, Tsubasa realises it's his worst nightmare. Clingy, whiney and too touchy-feely, Takki is the exact opposite of what he wanted. Add that to an aversion to housework and an insatiable curiousity for his work, he is useless around the house and is fast becoming a hazard to his career.

'Does my ass look big in this?' Takki asks as he admires the pink leggings struggling to cover his butt.

'Leave my stuff alone!' Tsubasa cries in exasperation as he rescues the poor overstretched fabric.

'But I love your work!'

'You don't even know what that means,' Tsubasa rebuts, 'just go sit in a corner somewhere and shut up.'

Obediently, Takki leaves, but not without slamming the door, just a little.

It's 3am and Tsubasa has finally decided to call it a day. Walking to the kitchen for a cold beer, he notices that Takki is still crouching by a corner in the balcony, looking forlornly into the distance.

Feeling a tinge of guilt, Tsubasa orders him in, 'You can come in now,’ in a gentler but still stoic tone. The next thing he knows, they're locked in a tight embrace.

'I’ve missed you.'

'Eh? It’s not even been a day.'

'But I still miss you,' Takki breaths into Tsubasa's ear. For a moment, he feels like he's melting. That warm breath, soft touch and velvety voice, they tug at his heartstrings.

Alas, that moment is short-lived. 'Do you know that I've counted 547, 324 stars tonight? How many can you count? I love them, don't you....' As quickly as that feeling surfaces, it dissipates. Collecting himself, Tsuabsa makes a mental note not to leave Takki alone for too long. He doesn't think he can withstand anymore breathless whispers.

But as days go by, that feeling resurfaces every now and then. When Tsubasa is busy washing the dishes after slaving over dinner preparation, Takki would always insist on helping. But the only thing he’s keen on washing - Tsubasa’s hands.

Even in bed, Tsubasa is busy fending off Takki’s advances. ‘Don’t touch me there,’ he instructs as he removes Takki’s fingers from his nipples. ‘Not there either,' he says, prying the hungry extensions off his crouch.

‘You’re no fun.’

‘Just play with yourself.’

‘But I’ve been doing that all day. Now I wanna play with you! Don’t you have needs too?’

Despite doing his very best in defending his modesty, it gets harder every night. And every morning he only wakes up ever more entwined with Takki.

Out of bed, it’s also increasingly hard not to fall for Takki’s goofy charms and random but frequent display of affection: hair-ruffling, nose-nuzzling and lingering back-hugs. Tsubasa realizes too that no calamity is without its consolation. He especially likes it when he returns home and Takki is always there to welcome him at the door, with a hug, a kiss and the most suffocatingly sweet ‘okaeri’ he has ever heard.

‘Have I told you I love you?’ Takki suddenly asks while they’re watching TV. Actually, only Tsubasa is mildly engaged in the happenings on the screen, Takki has been engrossed in counting the number of hair on Tsubasa’s leg for the past half hour.

‘Only every morning when I wake up and every night before I sleep. And that's not counting the spontaneous ones,’ he informs very as-matter-of-factly.

‘Oh, that’s not enough. Is that why you don’t love me?’

‘Love you?’

‘Yeah, I need love too,’ Takki shares meekly, while pretensiously admiring his latest nail art on Tsubasa.

‘You mean sex?’

‘No, silly! And don’t try confusing me. I’m sophisticated enough of a technology to know the difference between sex and love.’

Tsubasa nods in dismay, all the while thinking, ‘Robots have overtaken mankind.’

In order to show his ‘love’ for Takki, Tsubasa decides to take him out for some sun. Besides, having Takki store up on solar energy also cuts back on his massive electricity consumption . But he quickly realizes that there’s no such thing as a simple outing with Takki, it’s more like a kindergarten excursion.

‘No holding of my hand.’

‘But we’re crossing the road.’ Takki protests.

‘Pinky finger is off-limits too.’ ‘And no interlocking of arms either.’ ‘What’s your arm doing around my waist?’ ‘How does anyone walk properly with an arm around their shoulder?’

However, seeing the growing pout on Takki, Tsubasa concedes defeat. ‘Okay, okay, have it your way. But only when no one’s around,’ he softly comforts a sulking Takki.

The rest of the day is thankfully less nerve-wrecking and even a little pleasant. Idling their time away in a secluded park, Takki happily enacts all his romantic fantasies – making out under a tree, standing on a bench declaring his love aloud for the nth time that day then pulling a reluctant Tsubasa up for a snog, etc.

‘Let’s go to the beach next,’ Takki suddenly suggests.

‘What are you planning again?’ Tsubasa laments.

‘We can run with abandon towards the ocean then splash water onto each other until we’re soaking wet. Then we strip naked and have sex on the beach. How does that sound?’

‘Like a bad porn movie.’

‘Then we’ll watch sunset and count stars?’ Takki tries again, unsuccessfully. ‘You’re really no fun at all.’

Not to be put down, Tsubasa masterfully saves the day with the suggestion of shopping. And Takki is once again a happy Energizer bunny, packing everything up at record speed.

The shopping trip though eventful was thankfully less expensive than expected. Takki, preferring to go au naturel at home, has spared the hole in Tsubasa’s wallet. But he is still defenceless towards neon pink briefs with sparkly suggestive text.

‘Which should I wear tonight? Will it be “Do me crazy”, “Kiss, kiss me” or ‘I love you shake”?’

Quickly escaping into the bathroom, Tsubasa heaves a sigh of relief in the only sanctuary of his home. Since robots don’t need baths, Takki has been forbidden to enter. Still, he manages to make his presence felt with Robbie, the new rubber ducky they’ve just bought.

At the shop earlier, Takki was all over the little yellow squeaky thing, while all the giggly salesgirls' lusty eyes were all over him. ‘Isn’t it just the cutest thing?’ He cooed. ‘Aside from you, of course.’

Looking at the beady eyes staring soullessly back at him, Tsubasa disagrees. ‘No, Takki. You’re way cuter,’ he says then promptly sinks his face under water to hide the blush. ‘It’s so silly,’ his mind says. ‘But I like it,’ his heart answers.

This morning, it’s so quiet it’s unsettling. Takki’s gone off to meet an online friend, leaving Tsubasa with a sense of emptiness that is rapidly filling up with longing, jealousy and confusion. Caving under the restlessness, Tsubasa eventually takes to lying listlessly on the sofa waiting for the door to open. He wants to be there to welcome Takki home.

Finally, there’s life at the door. The bell rings.

‘Did you forget the keys? You’re such a baby, you know that?’

‘Hi, Imai-san. Are you expecting company?’ It’s a face he has almost forgotten, blundering Salesman Jin.

~To be continued~