Was this a dream again? My mind is awake but my eyes are still closed. I was afraid if I opened my eyes, everything would be gone. What if the most exciting night of my life never really existed? I'd be devastated definitely. If this was another dream, I needed to see the therapist. I clutched to my stomach tightly. I wasn't even sure if I wanted to wake up yet. If everything was a dream, I'd take the disapointment later. I'll fall back into sleep and see if the dream comes back. Matthew and I were not together in real life but I could continue dreaming about it right? I'll learn to take disapointment everytime I find out it's a dream and everything will be just fine.
But now I couldn't take the anticipation anymore. I just want to wake up and take disapointment. Sleep seems like a very bad idea. Something was telling me to open my eyes. I had to fight against my eyelids. I contemplated in whether to keep them closed or to open them. It's really hard for my eyelids to open now. I'm curious to open them yet I'm too scared that I'd hurt myself with this disapointment once again. In the end, my curiousity won. I opened my eyes. I could feel my heart sink 500 feet down my body. It's just an exageration but I was too broken to care. Why did I agree to opening my eyes. Of course I was in my hotel room bed but Matt wasn't in it with me.
I let myself cry. It was a really pathetic thing to do but I just let everything out. Why did I ever thought for one second that everything was real? Matthew didn't love me, what the hell was I thinking? How is this ever different from every other dream. I buried my face in the pillow and wrapped my hands around my legs. I need to escape from here. From this phase I'm in. No, I need to escape from this world. Everything was obviously too much for me. I don't want to live on like this. Everyday I feel the disapointment in me, wondering if what I'm dreaming would ever be real. Of course it wouldn't.
"Rachel, are you alright?" I quickly turned to the other side. All my sadness and disapointment immediately faded. Matthew walked out of the bathroom and plopped down on the bed next to me, hugging me tight. "Matt was everything real? Is this really happening right now? Do you love me? Is this a dream?" I shot him with questions. "Rachel, everything is real. None of it were dreams. I really love you and I'm sorry if I hurt you like this. I love you and I'd do anything for you. Do you know that?" he asked. I shrugged, "I don't know, you tell me" "Rachel, did you think last night was a dream?" he stroked my hair gently. I nodded. "I thought I was dreaming again so I freaked out. I don't want to live like that anymore. I want to be with you without any worries or doubts. Can we finally have that?"
"I want that" he nodded, holding onto my hand. "Then let's have that" I pecked his lips. "Well then your officially my girlfriend?" he looked at me for confirmation. I, of course nodded. "But promise me, no more sleeping cookies okay?" I took out my pinky. "Who does pinky promise anymore?" he scoffed. "I do" I pouted. "What are you like five?" he teased. "Shut up" I lightly shoved him. "I'm only kidding" he pulled me into a kiss. Then he rolled me over onto the bed.
I gave the lady at the register our room keys. "Thank you" I told the lady. "Your very welcome" she smiled kindly at me. I sat down on the sofa beside Nathan. He was on his Nintendo DS playing some game. I smirked and looked over at his screen. Then someone cleared their throat, interupting our game. We both looked up to see my parents. "Hello" Nathan got up and shook their hands politely. "Hey, we have to get going now. Your dad planned a trip to France and our flight is in several hours" my mother explained. "Okay, but have fun on your vacation" I hugged my mom. "You guys have fun at your honeymoon" my dad responded.
"Honeymoon?" I looked at Nathan. His eyes grew wide and immediately covered his mouth with his hand. "Well, I see" I turned back to my parents. "I wish you the best of luck though. And I'm so proud of you for all your lifetime accomplishments. Hope you live well" my mother kisses my forehead and turned to Nathan who was just finished talking to my dad. "Take good care of my daughter, she loves you and you love her" she gave my new husband a big hug. I couldn't help but smile. This image is something I'd want to treasure for the rest of my life. "Thanks and I will" he promised. Then my parents left the hotel.
"Nathan, honeymoon really?" I glared at him. "I wanted it to be a surprise" he frowned. "When did you plan it like two hours ago?" I questioned. "No" he said, bluffing. "Yesterday night right?" I stared at him. He chuckled. "Yeah, dude you didn't have to" I put a hand on his shoulder. "But I want to because we will" he played with my fingers. "Where are we going?" I asked. "I hope you like Italy" "Oh my god, I love you!" I hugged him, wrapping my legs around him. "Wow, I didn't know I was going to get this much love" he joked. "Thanks, I love Italy" I kissed him. Then someone cleared their throat again. I groaned, looking over at the owner of the voice. Josh waved at us awkwardly with Mateo, Josie, and Collin trailing behind. "Do we just return the room key?" Josh asked. "I guess so" I answered.
"Guys, I'll return it" Collin flashed me a grin and collected everyone's keys and went to the counter to return them. The lady at the counter smiled flirtatiously at him. I rolled my eyes and the guys laughed. When Collin came back, his face was flushed red. Nathan playfully shoved him which didn't make Collin feel any better. "I think you should get her number" I suggested. "Shut up" he punched my arms. I punched him back. "Immature" he muttered. I only laughed. "Do you guys want to go to the cafe and eat?" Mateo suggested. We all agreed, walking into the cafe. The waiter came over to take our orders.
"Do you want ice in your Sprite?" the waiter asked me. I looked over at Josh and smirked. He nodded, giving me a high five. "Definitely, and that gentleman wants ice too" I pointed at Josh. He nodded and walked away. Josh and I smiled deviously at each other. "It's on biatch!" he shouted. "Don't be embarrased when I kick your butt again!" I warned. "Why are you so sure that your going to win?" he questioned. "Because I will" I stuck my tongue at him. "You guys are so immature" Collin commented. "Just because we compete with ice" I mumbled under my breath. "Nathan do you want to play with us?" Josh asked my husband. "How do you play?" Nathan asked. I turned excitedly to him, "Okay when the ice comes we each grab one. The bigger the ice is, the more challenging it's going to be. I prefer the big ones. And you put it in your mouth, trying to make it melt as soon as possible. Whomever makes their ice melt first wins, got it?"
"Sounds like fun" he chuckled. We waited impatiently for the ice. Five minutes later, the waiter came over with the drinks. Most importantly, with the ice. "Let's go!" Josh was excited. We both usually get excited over this game. While on tour, we hung out a lot obviously. I guess we hung out enough for people to think that we were dating. Anyways, one day we decided to compete and we got stuck to it. He win some I win some. But I win most of the time. Not to brag or anything. We each took our choice of ice. The others watched us curiously. They find it weird yet so interesting. "Are you ready honey" I turned to Nathan. He grinned at me, nodding. "Ready to lose" I smirked. "Maybe I'll win, who knows?"
I highly doubt that. "Ready? 1,2,3 go!" we all threw the ice cube into our mouths. I used my special tongue technique to make my ice melt. I decided to take a big piece. I saw Josh's poor effort to take a smaller one. The one Nathan took was a little smaller than mine but not much differet. I can say that Josh is slacking off so if he wins I got something to say. The ice was turning smaller and smaller. I examined Josh. He was struggling.
Nathan was just an ametur so I guess I'm going to win this one. Just when I'm aloud to say I won, Nathan slammed his hand against the table, "it melted!" he shouted. Josh and I groaned simutaneously, turning to Nate. "It melted, see?" he opened his mouth to show prove. "I was so damn close" I mumbled. "Same" Josh sighed. "Congrats then" I kissed Nathan. "Your mad that I beat you right?" he asked. "Yeah but you won't win next time" I poked his cheek. "I won this time, what makes you think I won't win next time?" he questioned. "I finally found you guys" Josie walked over to us. "Where have you been?" I asked. "In my hotel room then I went to look for you guys. This lady told me you guys were here" she sat down next to Collin.
"Where's Matt?" Collin asked her. "How the hell would I know?" "He's your boyfriend, I think you should know where he is. Your man took my iPod yesterday and I forgot to get it back. I need to listen to my music desperately" he complained. Josie just rolled her eyes. Everyone was starting to come down one by one. We got a few tables and they started ordering their desired choice of food. "I can't find Rachel, she took my makeup bag but I forgot where I put it" Pandora told me. "I haven't seen her since last night" I answered. I was wondering if Rachel was alright.
My phone rang, causing the both of us to jump. "Who's calling?" he asked. "Skye" I picked up. "Rachel are you alright?" she sounded worried. "Yeah, why wouldn't I be?" I asked. "It's just that... Never mind where are you?" she asked. "In the hotel room" I answered. "Okay, I'm just going to tell you that we are in the cafe in the lobby okay?" "Yeah thanks for letting me know" and we both hung up. "So, let's get going?" I suggested. Matthew nodded and we got ready to leave. I still can't believe everything was real. I was trying to digest that process since I woke up and saw him. So I've been wasting my time sulking around for two years. I regret going out with Nathan. Things would have been different if that never happened. Skye and I would have had a better relationship from the start. They would have been happily together already. But most importantly, Matt would have been mine by now.
I should stop thinking about how much I regret the past. I'm here now, aren't I? Things are perfect here. I don't want any of this to change. This definitely is real and I should just not wish for anything because things happen for a reason. I believe in those kinds of supersticious stuff. It may sound crazy but everything worked out for me just fine. "Did you get your things?" he asked me. "Hopefully Pandora got my stuff" I sighed. "I still can't believe you invited Pandora" Matthew said. "She's Skye's high school friend of course she has to come" "I mean after all that's happened between Skye and Nathan" he commented. "Screw this, we should all just like everybody and live in peace" I opened his hotel door and walked to the lobby.
"I also can't believe we thought Skye was with Josh. She was pissed when I told her what we thought" Matthew kept talking. "It seems reasonable before but now it seems silly. I was the only one who thought they were just friends before the gathering dinner" I defended myself. "But we assume don't we? We're human aren't we?" "You and your philoshophy... Where did it bring us?" I rolled my eyes but smiled. We got in the elevator and punched in the lobby. "So when we get home, do you want to play video games?" he asked. "Most defintely" I responded. We come here acting all business and we leave here full of love. I hope my life turns out for the best. We got out when the elevator stopped at the lobby. "They are at this cafe" I commented, looking around the lobby. I put my sunglasses on. Matt gave me a questionable look but I stuck my tongue at him.
We walked in the cafe and immediately found our crowd. "Look they've finally arrived!" Alexander shouted, pointing at us. Everyone turned to look at us at once like they've been waiting for us for the last two hours. Perhaps, they have. "What's up with you two?" someone asked. "We have arrived, now I need to sit down" I said. Skye immediately finds a seat for me. "Thanks Skye" I hugged her. She gave me a look. I mouthed, "tell you later" and sat down on my given seat. Matthew sat down beside me. I took off my sunglasses, placing it on my hair as a headband. "What is this now like sibbling double dates?" Casey laughed pointing at us. We looked at each other glumly. It is kind of wack if I think about it.
Skye and I are sisters. She's with Nate and I'm with Matt. Nate and Matt are twin brothers. But what can you do? It's true love, can't do anything about it. I gazed at Josie. She gave me this questionable look. I shrugged at her. What is up with her now? Whatever we'll handle this later. "So Skye, Nathan, what are you guys up to now?" I asked to change the subject. "I'm taking her on a honeymoon to Italy" Nathan announced. Everyone at the tables cheered. "That's great" I hugged Nate then Skye. "I can't wait to go to Italy" she squealed. "Have fun then" I sat back down. "So where will you go?" "I want to go sightseeing and eat their food cuz I'm such a fatass" Skye snickered. "Italy is an amazing place" Josh said. "You've been there?" Skye asked.
"We toured there once, it's great" he flashed a grin. "That's nice" we all chatted for a while before Skye dragged me out of the cafe and brought me to the corner of the lobby. "Rachel, you have to tell me what happened" she squealed. "Matt loves me too" I said, smiling. "That's good, are you guys like together now?" she asked. "Most definitely" I gave her a high five. "I've never been so happy for you before" she was bouncing up and down. "Now you have" I laughed. "So how is he going to break up with Josie?" "It's easy, they weren't even together in the first place. They only went out to make me jealous" I simply replied. "And you have no problem with that?" she looked at me. "Not at all. I was mad at first but he loves me so that makes up for everything.
"That's amazing, I want to arrange your wedding since you arranged mine" she winked at me. "Whatever you want, but that seems far away" I shrugged. "Why do you think that?" "Look at you and Nathan. You guys went out for over two years and then you marry. Matthew and I weren't even together for a day yet, let's not assume so much" I commented. "Well let's not assume so less" she gave me a wicked grin. "Ugh, your making me a hopeless romantic" "You have a partner now don't you?" she continues grinning at me. "Yeah" "So how the hell would you feel like a hopeless romantic?" she questioned. "Skye, what's with you today?" I wandered aloud. "What do you mean?" "You act like a smart ass like you have a gift with one liners or something" I chuckled. She laughed a little. "Who knows, maybe I'm happy" she grabbed my wrists and pulled me back to the cafe. Everyone stared at us in confusion. "Nathan, I think you got competition" Alexander joking, pointing at me and Skye. Everyone laughed, including Nathan. "Is that even possible?" he asked. "Is what possible?"
"Can you even go out with your own sibling?" he questioned. "That's kind of weird but look at Jack White and Katie or whatever her name is from the White Stripes" Fiona pointed out. "Are they even married?" I asked. "Who knows?" Matthew shrugged. "That's weird" Casey commented. "Your weird" Skye smirked at him. "Your mom is weird" he shot back. I rolled my eyes, Skye and her bandmate's are so immature yet so interesting. "Your dad is weird" she laughed, "... In bed" we all laughed as Casey stayed silent. "That's what I thought" Skye smirked, turning back to Nathan. She said something to him and they both laughed, holding onto each other's hand. So romantic. I looked over at Matt. He was smiling at me. I was the lovestruck fool that smiled back. God, I love this man. We hung out for a few more hours before everyone decided to leave.
Nathan and Skye has to go back home and pack for the honeymoon to Italy. Everyone was leaving otherwise. "Pandora?" I turned to her. "Huh?" "Do you have my stuff?" I asked her. "Oh shit, I left it in your room. I thought you were going to your room last night but instead you slept somewhere else" she gave Matt a sideways glance. I blushed and he looked at us cluelessly. "Sorry, I'll go get it then..." Pandora pulled me back to my spot. "Oh no, allow me to go get it" I muttered my thanks to her and she walked into the elevator. "Ready to go?" Matthew wrapped his arms around me. "Yeah I am" I pecked his lips. "I'll get the car, be right back" he kissed me before walking out to the hotel parking lot.
When I turned around, Josie was standing there. She shook her head at me. "What? Aren't you happy for me?" I examined her. She bit her lips and continued to shake her head. "But we're finally together. Your plan has worked" Josie looked at me more confused than ever. "Whoa what plan?" "You and Matthew were making a plan to make me jealous so I could realize that he's the one for me" I explained, more confused and worried. "Who told you that, Matthew?" she smirked. "Yeah" "Are you kidding me? He doesn't really like me? I thought we were perfect for each other. He told me that he loved me. At first I was mad at you for stealing him from me. I saw you kissing him and I was mad. Did you honestly believe him? Did he really say that?" she questioned. I covered my mouth. Matt lied to me? He was actually with Josie? I thought Matt loved me.
Maybe he did but he's using Josie as a stepping stone? Or he loved her until he saw me. But the dreams were real, weren't they? I feel betrayal and anger burning inside of me. Matthew was the guy I least expected to do this to me. He was my best fried. I thought we trusted each other to tell the truth to each other. He was with Josie and trying to find an excuse to get me is really sad. That was just really low for him. "Hey what's the matter?" I looked up. Matthew put a hand on my shoulder. "Nothing" I shook his hand away from me, turning to Josie. She excused herself and walked away. "But we have to get home okay?" he asked me softly, trying to kiss me. I turned away from him again. "What is the matter with you?" he asked me, getting impatient. "What's the matter with me? Are you kidding? You think I'm stupid?"
"No I don't, what's wrong?" he continued to play dumb. "Perhaps you think I am stupid. I know you lied to me. How can you use Josie like that. I can't believe I actually believed you when you told me you loved me" I shouted. "I do, what the hell is going on here?" he yelled helplessly. "You know so damn well what's going on. You just don't like getting caught lying to me. How dare you play around Josie and I like that? She's my best friend!" "I thought I was your best friend" he frowned. "Until you lied to me" I snorted. "I didn't lie to you. I really love you, why don't you understand?" he shouted. "Josie told me everything. Who are you fooling?" I shot at him. "Josie? What the hell did she say then? If what she told you make you turn on me like this then somethings not right. She's lying and I'm not. Do you believe me?" I shook my head. He sighed. "We have to go home anyways"
"You can go home. I'm not riding in the same car as you" I rolled my eyes at him. "How will you get home then?" he smirked. I strugged for a second. I let Fiona borrow my car because she came with Frank and he's going to drive to California to meet up with his band. "She can ride with me" we both turned around to see Pandora with my stuff. "Yep exactly" I walked over to Pandora,
taking my stuff. "Rachel, don't be like this" Matthew pouted. "I thought we could finally be happy together but no, you were only lying about Josie" I ignored him, following Pandora to her car. "So what happened?" she asked when we got in her car. "Matt told me he loved me and he's going out with my friend Josie" I looked outside the window at the beautiful landscape.
"Damn, that's low" she mumbled. "I can't believe I fell for it" I sighed. "It's not your fault. We all know that them Leone's are super attractive" she confessed. "Were you attracted to Nathan?" I decided to ask her that. I knew they were once involved with each other. She nodded, "I didn't think it was love at all. It's just lust" she shook her head. "But he was attractive" I added. "Yeah of course, there's this thing about him that makes me want to jump right at him" she said honestly. "I used to be in love with him as well" I said. "I mean what's not to like about him? It's just that I don't feel any love, I just wanted to get in his pants" she continued. "Well, I've never really had a lust relationship with anyone" I told her. "That's good for you. Your clean" she smiled at me. "Like I feel like a Leone whore. In my whole life I've only slept with Nate and Matt" I sighed.
"That's good. I mean I've had sex with so many guys, it's not even funny. Of course I've slept with Nathan so many times even when he had a girlfriend at the time. Then I slept with Matthew once by mistake" she coughed. "Wow really? What happened?" I was suddenly curious even though I hate him now. "I thought he was Nathan so it was a mistake" she simply said. "So Matthew didn't do anything about it?" I questioned. "He didn't even bother tell me he wasn't Nathan. That was embarrasing and heart breaking" she replied. "Matthew sucks" I growled. "But you loved him" she sighed. "Well I don't anymore because he made me think he loved me" I mumbled. "Think about it, what if he does?" she suggested. "Then he's trying to balance Josie and I" I scoffed. "I guess your right" Pandora didn't have anything to say to that. "This is your house right?" she asked. "Yeah" I got my stuff from the trunk and waved goodbye to her, walking back into my house.
Why is my life like this? I thought everything was suppose to be perfect now. I always thought that Matthew and I were meant to be. I guess the jackass has to ruin it. Suddenly my cellphone rang. I ignored the call, knowing it's Matt. There is no excuse in the world that would make everything okay. My heart feels broken and used now. Why does everything have to be so damn complicated? It's like nothing good ever happens in my life. I couldn't help but jump at my bed and cry. Maybe I can get over Matthew. It sounds simple. Getting over someone isn't really my thing but I have a way. I would cry for a period of time then I'd watch movies and eat ice cream. That measures the end of a relationship and the guy will be erased from my heart. That's how I got over every guy that's ever dumped me. That's how I got over Nathan. Getting over Matthew wouldn't be too hard right?