Innocent school girl Stacey gets more than she bargained for when she falls for 'the new kid' (aka Jared)
(#) eileanskye 2010-08-14 11:10:01 AMSo, after you've finished the story I think I should give you an overall review :)
I really like this story and I think it's your second-best so far (the best being 'I miss you Jared Leto', I just love that one :D)
However, there are some things you could improve. This is really meant to be constructive criticism and no offence. I'm not an expert myself but that's just what I noticed while reading, and maybe it helps you :)
I think you have really good ideas, the only thing is that sometimes you're "jumping" too fast from one thing to another, which sometimes makes things seem a bit ridiculous...if you know what I mean.
But other than that I think you're a good writer and hopefully you will keep writing, because like I said, you have really good ideas! :)
Author's responseThanks you so much for trying to help me improve! I have a few more stories planned and I will bare that in mind!
Thanks again and I hope you check out any new stories I upload!