Just explaining more about his life and stuff at home.
My mother had gotten into a fight at the bar the other night and came home absolutely battered, bleeding from almost everywhere on her face and she was crying. Oh, did I mention she was drunk? Well, it’s nothing unusual for me, but for you it would be. Seen, as you don’t know much about her cause this is just the second entry and all…
So anyway, she came home all beaten up and I had to clean her face and bandage it up, using ant-bacterial cream, which she didn’t like too much. I now have four fingernail scratches down my cheek because of it, when I was only trying to help. She yelled at me a heap and literally threw me into her room, but I’m used to it I guess, its happened all my life since father left.
He left because he didn’t want me. I'm not going to hesitate to write anything down, ill just write everything straight out. That night I will never forget. I remember him yelling at my mother, saying how much he hated me and how much I had ruined his life already, and I was only five. He hit her a few times, leaving massive dark purple bruises on her face, and hit me once across the face, which made me topple over.
I also remember my mother begging and pleading him to stay, telling him that I needed a father and that I wouldn’t be ‘normal’ if he left. He just flipped her off and walked out the door, leaving her in tears and kneeling on the floor while I sat there helpless.
Now, when she’s drunk (which is 99% of the time), she blames me for leaving and tells me how much she hates me for it. She tells me I'm a mistake and that if I weren’t around she would be living the perfect life. I, on the other hand, don’t know whether to listen and take it to heart because it could be just the alcohol talking right?
I hope it is to be honest, I don’t know what I would do if I didn’t have her actually… I know it sounds weird after everything I have told you but really, she’s my mother and I honestly think if she left with my father, I wouldn’t survive this world at all. School is hell for me cause they all know about my mother and the state my house is in because of it, and then when I come to school with a few cuts of bruises I guess that just gives the wrong messages too.
I’ve always been the outcast at school. I never told my mother how bad it gets though, not that I think she would care. They beat me and shove me into lockers, mostly my own, and leave me there until a teacher finds out I'm in there. Which is a daily basis now, so its pretty much on their schedule. One of the worst things about it all is, I cant get Alex in trouble for it either! His father is the big-shot millionaire that hands out greens to the school like its leaves. Honestly, they only keep him out of trouble to keep on his father’s good side so he doesn’t cut the money that’s flowing in. Money… that’s something I wouldn’t mind having some of…
Great, there’s a storm out, means power’s going to go off soon. Can't write in the dark so I’ll write tomorrow. Well, ill try to, I can't promise. Depends if I don’t get beaten to death by Alex tomorrow… Night, and Bye!
Frank 3 November