3 months later.
Things were going pretty well, and no one knew about what Quinn and I had planned, that is until someone mentioned me getting bigger.
‘Dude, Lilly come back here,’ Bert called after me as I walked past him. I turned around to face him and his eyes got big. ‘You’re getting fat.’
‘Gee, thanks.’ I said laughing.
‘Just letting you know.’ He giggled.
‘It’s a secret.’ I said and began walking past him again.
‘Stop eating all the Twinkies!’ He shouted after me.
‘Twinkies! Twinkies Bert! Sick.’ I shouted back. I was hungry, and I was walking toward the kitchen. When I walked in the kitchen, Livvy was in there.
‘Getting a belly there, eh Lilly?’ She asked me.
‘Oh god, not you too.’ I said looking in the fridge.
‘Craving something to eat?’ She guessed leaning up against the counter.
‘Yeah…’ I said cautiously.
‘Do you know if it’s a boy or a girl yet?’ She wondered aloud.
‘You know what..’ I began threatening her, but stopped, ‘I think it’s a girl, but Quinn wants it to be a boy.’
‘That’s cute.’ She told me, watching me move stuff around in the fridge to find what I wanted.
‘Uh-huh.’ I said and cheered after finding a chocolate pudding. I grabbed a spoon and began eating it.
‘I don’t think any of the guys realize that you can’t form fat shaped like a beach ball within three months. I’m sure they’ll figure it out soon.’ She laughed.
‘Oh yeah, Quinn keeps saying he’s going to tell everyone, but every time he tries I stop him.’ I told her.
‘Not surprising.’ Livvy said as Jeph walked in the room. During the past three months he had managed to move past me, for the most part. I have a feeling something as big as a baby might change that. But, he walked in with Taylor at his side. She started renting an apartment downtown SLC and visited here and there. They have been dating for a month now. ‘Hey bro.’
‘Yo.’ He said and jumped on the counter, ‘What’s not surprising?’
‘Uhh, that Lilly took the last pudding, again.’ She covered.
‘Ah, I see. You and Quinn have been gaining weight.’ He mentioned to me.
‘Uh, yeah.’ I said quickly.
‘Fat-asses.’ He laughed, ‘Not you. Just him.’
‘Well thanks. That’s a lot nicer than what Bert said.’ I told him.
‘I’m a nice person. Bert, not so much. What did he say?’ He asked me while Taylor rolled her eyes and leaned up against the counter next to Jeph.
‘He said “You’re getting fat.” And that wasn’t nice.’ I sighed almost wanting to tell him.
‘Gee, what a bastard.’ Jeph laughed.
‘I can hear everything you are saying you know!’ Bert yelled.
‘Aw, suck it up.’ Jeph told him.
‘Go jerk off.’ Bert said.
‘Ok, forget him.’ I muttered to Jeph and whispered to Livvy, ‘Should I just tell them?’
‘Yes, or I will.’ She responded.
‘Shit. This is awkward, with her here.’ I told her knowing they could hear.
‘Hey guys! Guess wha--’ Livvy started but I cut her off.
‘Ok ok I get the point.’ I whispered to her then turned to face Jeph properly, ‘I’m not exactly gaining weight, I’m… uh-’
‘Pregnant. She’s pregnant.’ Livvy finished for me. Jeph’s mouth dropped and Taylor sighed. Jeph looked around the room for a minute then settled his gaze on the floor. I wondered if Jeph still had some feelings for me, I hoped not.
‘Yeah, what she said.’ I said looking down at my feet.
‘That’s great!’ Jeph smiled, and I knew it was fake, ‘Quinn’s baby, right?’
‘No it’s secretly yours and you never knew it… yeah it is.’ I joked.
‘Funny one.’ He laughed. I walked out of the kitchen and outside. Quinn was still sleeping, so I didn’t have anything to do really. I heard someone walk outside after me, and I thought it might be Livvy or Jeph, but when I turned around, it was Taylor.
‘So, you’re having a baby..?’ She asked, ‘With Quinn?’
‘Yep. What’s it to you?’ I asked.
‘Making sure it isn’t Jeph’s, that’s all.’ She gave me a dirty look.
‘What if it was his?’ I asked again.
‘I would ask you to lie to him.’ She told me.
‘…wow… bitch much.’ I mumbled.
‘Shut the fuck up. I don’t want to lose him. I actually appreciate him, unlike you.’ She spat in my face.
‘Bitch, you don’t think I did. I fucking loved him.’ I slapped her across the face for spitting in mine.
‘Don’t fucking touch me!’ She shoved me away from her.
‘Too late, I already did stupid.’ I shoved her back.
‘I’m leaving.’ She said and walked around me.
‘Good.’ I said and walked farther into the yard, away from the house. I watched as she walked to the end of the driveway and down the street. Hm, she didn’t even tell Jeph she was leaving. I just wanted to hurt her so badly, but she was with Jeph and that gave her some safety from me. Jeph walked outside toward me. ‘I’m sorry, but your girlfriend is a bitch to me.’
‘Ignore her. You shouldn’t let her get to you.’ He advised me.
‘I know, but the things she said… it pissed me off.’ I told him.
‘I understand. But I have to go after her.’ He told me.
‘…that’s too bad.’ I sighed.
‘Why?’ He asked.
‘Just go, it’s nothing.’ I lied.
‘I umm, what is it? I know you’re lying.’ He said.
‘Jeph, just go.’ I walked up to him and started dragging him the way his girlfriend went.
‘I don’t want to.’ He turned around and kissed me.
‘Is this what you want?’ I asked him.
‘I wouldn’t be doing it if I didn’t want it.’ He told me.
‘Jeph… now I wish we didn’t have that big argument before.’ I sighed.
‘It’s ok, I forgive you, and I hope you’ll forgive me. But, you’re the only woman who can make me happy.’ He said. What was I going to do?
‘Yeah, I do forgive you. I did a long time ago.’ I smiled.
‘Maybe you should get back to Quinn.’ Jeph suggested regretfully. I knew he didn’t want me to leave.
‘I guess so…’ I said and walked inside with Jeph following behind me. He was asking Bert if he’s seen Taylor when I closed the door to Quinn’s bedroom behind me. I walked quietly down the stairs and heard voices, or were they moans? It sounded like Taylor down there. I ventured farther into the basement, saw them, and screamed.
I was standing in the kitchen alone when I heard a faint scream from the basement. What in the world? I don’t even want to know. I looked at Quinn’s bedroom door when Lilly came running out with Quinn chasing after her. They ran outside and into the front yard, followed by Taylor, who kept her pace at a steady walk. Oh I hate her. I decided to go outside to make sure nothing too serious happened and Bert came up behind me and followed. We were standing at the edge of the yard when I noticed Sonny walking up the driveway. Oh god, I was already re-thinking my relationship with Bert and now he has to come. He looked over at me and smiled, but that smile quickly faded when he saw Lilly and Quinn screaming at each other in the yard. Jeph came running up beside me.
‘What’s going on?’ He asked me.
‘Lilly came running upstairs, followed by Quinn, followed by Taylor. I’m guessing Quinn was cheating on Lilly with your girlfriend.’ I told him.
‘OH, GO FUCK HER AGAIN QUINN! I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU! I JUST WANT TO-TO…’ Lilly yelled at Quinn.
‘TO WHAT LILLY?! SHE CAME DOWNSTAIRS!’ He yelled back.
‘You told me to. We’ve been going behind their backs for two weeks now.’ Taylor interrupted.
‘SHUT THE FUCK UP! THAT’S NOT HELPING!’ Quinn shouted over her voice.
‘TWO WEEKS! TWO FUCKING WEEKS QUINN! I JUST WANT TO STRANGLE YOU!’ She screamed at him. There is no way any of this was good for her baby.
‘Lilly, go inside. Take a break, please.’ I pleaded with her as Sonny walked up and stood next to me.
‘Leave me alone Livvy.’ She told me and walked up to Quinn and slapped him as hard as she could across his face, ‘You deserve so much fucking worse.’
‘I’m a horrible person, I GET IT! I’m going for a walk.’ Quinn sighed and took off down the driveway.
‘Inside.’ I reminded Lilly and ushered her into the house followed by everyone except Taylor, who followed Quinn.
‘God, I fucking hate that stupid bitch.’ Lilly cried.
‘To your room, meaning Jeph’s.’ I ordered her. Jeph better thank me for this later. She left calmly and slammed his door behind her.
‘To your room.’ I told Jeph.
‘Yes mother.’ He said and walked to his room. I took a deep breath and fell onto the couch.
‘Holy mother, one can only take so much drama in one hour.’ I looked up at everyone.
‘I agree.’ Bert said looking at Sonny, but I noticed that Sonny was only looking at me. ‘I guess I’m out of the picture now. Sonny, she’s all yours.’
‘What? What are you talking about?’ I asked him not believing what he just said.
‘I’m breaking up with you. That’s all. I’m moving to LA. So, you can be with Sonny.’ He told me and walked away from the living room.
‘After all of the fucking promises he made me…’ I muttered. Sonny sat down next to me and hugged me.
‘It’s alright. Things will work out.’ He told me.
‘It’s kind of weird that he just did that. I’ve been thinking about you a lot lately and how I made a mistake. I’ve missed you, and I was going to break up with him.’ I confessed.
‘Livvy, I’ve missed you too.’ He smiled and kissed me.
‘What does this mean?’ I asked him kissing him back. I couldn’t believe how fast I was getting over Bert. I had just hoped we could be friends again.
‘What do you want it to mean? I love you Livvy.’ He said.
‘That we’re together again and that maybe one day I’ll have that ring on my finger again. I love you too.’ I told him.
‘Funny you should mention the ring… I still have it here with me.’ He smirked.
‘You still have it?’ I asked shocked that he would keep it.
‘Yeah, I was hoping that we would end up together again.’ He kissed me again.
‘Well here we are.’ I smiled.
‘Will you marry me?’ He asked getting on one knee.
‘Of course.’ I pulled him up and kissed him again as he slid the ring on my finger.
‘I love you.’ He said hugging me.
‘I love you too.’ I hugged him back tightly as Quinn and Taylor walked into the house. Quinn seemed to be trying to get rid of her.
‘Just go home.’ He was saying.
‘I want to be here with you.’ She said in a tone that sounded like she’d been saying it over and over.
‘GO HOME!’ He yelled in her face.
‘FUCK YOU QUINN ALLMAN!’ Taylor screamed and left slamming the door behind her.
Jeph made me sit in the room until I had calmed down, but then I heard Quinn yelling, and that got me going again. I stood up and started to run out of the door, but Jeph stopped me by grabbing my arm.
‘Lilly, don’t go.’ He said pulling me toward him.
‘Let me go.’ I told him yanking my arm away. He let go and I went out to the living room and saw Sonny, Livvy, and Quinn. ‘I fucking hate you, I hate you.’ I kept saying over and over as I hit him on the head repeatedly. He was trying to block my hits. Jeph came running in after me and pulled me off Quinn and turned me around so I was facing him.
‘Calm down.’ He told me.
‘It’s hard to.’ I said with tears running down my cheeks.
‘Maybe this will calm you down.’ He said and hugged me tightly. It did calm me a bit, but I still wanted to yell and scream at Quinn. ‘I love you.’ He reminded me as he let me go.
I smiled at him and turned away from him, ‘Why would you do it Quinn? Everything you said to me--’
‘Was TRUE.’ Quinn interrupted me, ‘Every single thing I said was true. I’m just, not ready to be a dad. And this was my way of showing it. I get that you hate me now. I’m sorry! And…I don’t know!’
‘You-you hurt me in the worst way possible Quinn. You COULD have told ME you weren’t ready, I would have been there for you. Instead you fucked that stupid bitch.’ I cried, ‘And, how could every word have been true? You cheated AGAIN!!’
‘Because I do love you. And everything was true. You do make me happy. And I did this, not only because I wasn’t ready, but because I realized that Jeph is the better man for you. And I guess it scared me.’ He said.
‘Oh my god Quinn, you fucked someone else because you were scared of your best friend taking me away. WHAT THE FUCK?!’ I yelled.
‘I DON’T KNOW!’ He yelled back, ‘Tell me you wouldn’t go back to him.’
‘I sure as fuck won’t go back to you!’ I exclaimed with anger in my voice.
‘I understand. But just, tell me you won’t go back to him. Prove me wrong.’ Quinn asked me calmly.
‘I can’t prove anything to you. I can’t trust you, I can’t even trust myself. I-I can’t fucking handle this right now Quinn.’ I told him with a sigh. I needed a glass of water and to sit down before I passed out.
‘I’m sorry. I’m a fuck up. I always mess everything up.’ Quinn walked up to me, ‘But don’t get me wrong when I tell you I meant every word I said.’
‘…I need to sit… I think I’m going to faint…’ I whispered just loud enough that Quinn heard me. He picked me up and laid me down lightly on the couch, then knelt down in front of me.
‘I’ll do anything to make it up to you.’ He promised me.
‘get me a glass of water..’ I mumbled and before I could finish the word water Quinn was up and in the kitchen. He came back with a tall glass filled with water and handed it to me. I took a big drink and handed it back to him. ‘That doesn’t make it up to me by the way.’
‘What do I have to do?’ He asked as he grabbed my hand and laid his free hand on my belly.
‘Not do this anymore.’ I said.
‘I promise you I won’t.’ He said.
‘You won’t ever cheat on me, or even have the thought?’ I asked.
‘Never.’ He assured me.
‘But, how can I even trust you.’ I sighed.
‘As hard as it may be, you’d just have to try and trust me again.’ He told me. I squeezed his hand and closed my eyes. I didn’t feel very good at the moment. ‘Lilly, are you ok?’
‘I’ll be fine…’ I managed without getting sick.
‘What do you say..?’ He asked me, indicating giving him another chance.
‘Um, I will-’ I began, but quickly sat up and puked all over Quinn.
‘Thank you.’ He smiled at me, then looked down at his lap and the puddle of puke in it, ‘Do you need me to get you something? A bucket?’
‘I think something’s wrong, not with the baby but me...’ I told him clutching onto my stomach, ‘I-’ And I puked again, I wish I wouldn’t do that.
‘I’m taking you to bed.’ Quinn told me before picking me up and carrying me down to his room, then lying me down in his bed. I fell asleep as soon as he laid me down, but I drifted in-between dreaming and waking. I kept dreaming about talking birds saying something very strange. When I actually woke, it was almost noon, and everyone was awake. I went upstairs and saw Livvy cuddled with Sonny on the couch and Jeph sitting on a chair nearby. Quinn was nowhere to be found.
‘Where is he?’ I asked them still pissed from yesterday.
‘He went to the store.’ Livvy told me after kissing Sonny.
‘Sonny! Gosh, get a room.’ I exclaimed as they kept on kissing. It was gross watching my brother make out with my best friend.
‘Eh, maybe later.’ He joked with me. I didn’t know what I was going to do. Should I go back to Quinn and risk getting hurt again, or find someone else? I rubbed the sleep out of my eyes and went into the kitchen to find something to eat. I ended up micro waving a couple of burritos. Jeph came into the kitchen right as the microwave beeped.
‘Hey, are you alright?’ He asked concerned.
‘Yeah, I’ll be fine. All that stress yesterday made me sick, literally.’ I sighed thinking about him kissing me and telling me all those things, ‘I’m sorry Jeph.’
‘Sorry for what?’ He wondered.
‘For causing so many problems with you and Quinn. I’m sorry for causing problems with your girlfriend too… but she just told me to lie to you…’ I muttered.
‘About what?’ He questioned.
‘When she found out I was pregnant, she wondered if it was yours and I asked her what if it was… She told me to lie to you then, and that pissed me off…’ I sighed again.
‘Don’t worry about it. I’m done with her.’ He reassured me before hugging me. Quinn walked into the kitchen.
‘What are you doing?’ He asked us.
‘Hugging.’ I told him without a smile. I couldn’t smile at him, he still made me angry, ‘Why?’
‘Nothing.’ He said.
‘Quinn, we aren’t together you know.’ I told him before he said anything else.
‘I wish we were.’ He sighed and put away the groceries. After he was finished, he left the kitchen.
‘Jeph, I’m probably going back with Quinn. It’d be best.’ I told him looking at my feet.
‘That can’t be what you truly want?’ He asked lifting my chin up to look him in the eyes.
‘I don’t know, I just know that its what’s best.’ I said and walked out of the kitchen to talk with Quinn.