Categories > Anime/Manga > Bleach > Outshining the Moon
Author's Note: This just felt like it needed to be written. This chapter just doesn't feel as...focused, i guess...as the one before it. I don't know. It took a lot more thought to write this one. You guys will have to tell me what you think of it.
Summary: Sode no Shirayuki muses about Rukia and Ichigo.
Please Review!
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To Extinguish the Sun
"He was Zangetsu. The Black Sun. And he outshone the moon."
His strength had been formidable. He demanded hers, and she was unable to refuse. He stripped her of her strength, devoured it hungrily. And the sun shone brighter. The landscape of his world materialized around her. His power drew her as he absorbed hers, draining her as a thirsty man might drain a gallon of water.
The buildings here were senseless. Sideways. Heavy rain clouds hid the burning disc, but she could still feel its presence. The glass windows of the buildings were warm to the touch, a glaring contrast between the frigid, frozen earth of Rukia's soul.
Sode no Shirayuki found it hard to breath. She did not belong here, and her body knew it. This intrusion went against everything that was right and natural. She tried to hold herself together, to keep herself from ripping apart as she felt she might. The tugging sensation at the core of her being was insistent, urgent.
Rukia had not summoned her, so how could she possibly have left the confines of the inner world? It was unheard of. Zanpakutous did not enter foreign souls.
The agony of the separation increased. Sode no Shirayuki could not keep herself from curling up, her arms futilely trying to hold herself together. Powerless, she could only attempt to retain her grip on her sanity.
That experience had changed her. She had begun to worry that she might be trapped inside this dizzying, inverted world. The buildings made her head spin, and she could hardly think with the disconcerting power of the sun pressing in on her. And then, the cold, shining expanse greeted her. As quickly as she had been taken from her world of ice and snow, she had returned. And there was no trace of the crushing darkness left.
Time progressed. Sode no Shirayuki watched the stranger grow, watched Rukia tutor and train him to take up the mantle they were as yet unable to shoulder. They waited. But their power did not return. Zangetsu had stolen it, and he was in no hurry to give it back.
It frustrated her to not be able to deal with the Hollows as she had before. To simply watch, in the disjointed and disconnected fragments that filtered down to her from Rukia, as Zangetsu grew and reveled in the thrill of battle, tormented her. She longed to showcase her abilities, to prove that she was more than a powerless hanger-on. It frustrated them to be so weak, to have rely on others in such a way.
And yet she pitied the black zanpakutou. His partner did not know his name, was unaware that the sword even had a name. What a lonely existence. Lonelier by far than the isolation she had known. He remained unacknowledged, unvalidated. Unclaimed.
Rukia never so much as breathed a hint to the boy of Zangetsu's existence. Sode no Shirayuki's anger was sharp, clear. Zanpakutous were not mindless tools. But Rukia was training the boy to fight as if they were. So it was hardly his fault when he was beaten soundly, left for dead. And it was partly Rukia's fault. Sode no Shirayuki could hardly contain her anger. It was incredible that Rukia seemed altogether unharmed by the intensity of the emotion that hung like a heavy cloud upon her soul.
The anger flowed freely between Sode no Shirayuki and Rukia. They disputed the issue openly, talked about it as they had never talked about anything before. And perhaps Rukia did not listen to much of her zanpakutou's argument, but the very fact that the discussion was possible evidenced that they had reached a higher level of understanding, and Sode no Shirayuki could not help being pleased.
Rukia was learning to acknowledge her, even though she was powerless, weak. They were well on their way to becoming a perfect union of soul and power, discretion and killing instinct. This separation of soul was hard on them both. They were part of the same essential being, and yet they operated separately, apart from each other. Two parts of the same whole, each thinking for itself, apart from the whole.
Rukia took more notice of the zanpakutou residing in her soul. As they days wore on, and her small cell afforded the shinigami little to catch her interest, Sode no Shirayuki found Rukia's attention focused inward far more often than she was used to. It was gratifying, this change. Rukia appeared on the snowy plain frequently. They did not always speak, but it was enough that she was there.
As the end drew nearer, their understanding strengthened. Rukia seemed to have come to terms with her fate. She awaited it, untroubled, unconcerned. Her thoughts were often occupied by thoughts of the one who'd saved them from the darkness. The sunny, loud youth who never listened and often threw his power around like a clumsy stick. She had resigned herself to never see him again.
Sode no Shirayuki knew better. She fought against Rukia's apathy, threw her anger at the boundaries of the inner world violently. She would not end this way, crouched pathetically in a cell. She would not end powerless, weak, unable to defend herself. It was a disgrace to their very existence as warriors.
The sun would not be dimmed so easily. It burned with the strength of ten million flames; a small dousing would not put out its fire. Even the brilliance of the sokyoku appeared dark and insignificant next to its vibrance.
The moon cannot shine without the sun. Sode no Shirayuki was aware how vitally important the boy had become to them. He balanced them. Somehow, even with his sideways, twisted soul, he had become the center of their circle of orbit. Without the sun, there was no light. Without the sun, only crushing, despairing darkness awaited them. Without the sun, they would disappear.
Rukia underestimated the stubborn determination of that sun. In her mind, it burned only with the strength of a single, transient candle; a small spec of light shuddering and quaking at the passage of beings whose powers far outmatched its own. This narrow view of the boy, of his zanpakutou, was grossly mistaken. Somehow, Rukia had forgotten the brilliance of that sun upon their first meeting. She had forgotten how completely he had chased away the darkness, how easily he had overpowered them, even before he had absorbed their powers. She had let doubt and fear cloud her thoughts. And without the sun to banish it, the darkness came slinking back.
This darkness was far more serious than the first had been. This darkness was born of self-pity and hopelessness. This darkness was of Rukia's own making. Before, it had threatened only to crush them, to crush their will and spirit; this time, it threatened to completely obliterate them. The shadow of the Sokyoku had fallen over them.
Slowly, the underestanding slipped away. Rukia grew distant, wrapped up in her own regrets and memories. Memories in which Sode no Shirayuki had no place. Memories of people and times and places that she knew nothing about.
The time was almost upon them. Sode no Shirayuki berated Rukia for her cowardice, her doubt, her fear, her blindness. But her remonstrances fell on deaf ears, for Rukia would not listen. The zanpakutou was not sure that Rukia even realized she was ignoring her. The short raven-haired shinigami was completely wrapped up in the past. Her regrets overpowered Sode no Shirayuki's voice, filled her shinigami's ears so that she could not hear what her own soul was trying to tell her.
The time was upon them, and the blazing fury of the Sokyoku bore down upon them. They would have ended that way, would have met a coward's end, if not for the unextinguishable fire of the Black Sun. That which Sode no Shirayuki had always known was made clear to Rukia in those few moments.
The only thing that could extinguish the sun was the sun itself.
Summary: Sode no Shirayuki muses about Rukia and Ichigo.
Please Review!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
To Extinguish the Sun
"He was Zangetsu. The Black Sun. And he outshone the moon."
His strength had been formidable. He demanded hers, and she was unable to refuse. He stripped her of her strength, devoured it hungrily. And the sun shone brighter. The landscape of his world materialized around her. His power drew her as he absorbed hers, draining her as a thirsty man might drain a gallon of water.
The buildings here were senseless. Sideways. Heavy rain clouds hid the burning disc, but she could still feel its presence. The glass windows of the buildings were warm to the touch, a glaring contrast between the frigid, frozen earth of Rukia's soul.
Sode no Shirayuki found it hard to breath. She did not belong here, and her body knew it. This intrusion went against everything that was right and natural. She tried to hold herself together, to keep herself from ripping apart as she felt she might. The tugging sensation at the core of her being was insistent, urgent.
Rukia had not summoned her, so how could she possibly have left the confines of the inner world? It was unheard of. Zanpakutous did not enter foreign souls.
The agony of the separation increased. Sode no Shirayuki could not keep herself from curling up, her arms futilely trying to hold herself together. Powerless, she could only attempt to retain her grip on her sanity.
That experience had changed her. She had begun to worry that she might be trapped inside this dizzying, inverted world. The buildings made her head spin, and she could hardly think with the disconcerting power of the sun pressing in on her. And then, the cold, shining expanse greeted her. As quickly as she had been taken from her world of ice and snow, she had returned. And there was no trace of the crushing darkness left.
Time progressed. Sode no Shirayuki watched the stranger grow, watched Rukia tutor and train him to take up the mantle they were as yet unable to shoulder. They waited. But their power did not return. Zangetsu had stolen it, and he was in no hurry to give it back.
It frustrated her to not be able to deal with the Hollows as she had before. To simply watch, in the disjointed and disconnected fragments that filtered down to her from Rukia, as Zangetsu grew and reveled in the thrill of battle, tormented her. She longed to showcase her abilities, to prove that she was more than a powerless hanger-on. It frustrated them to be so weak, to have rely on others in such a way.
And yet she pitied the black zanpakutou. His partner did not know his name, was unaware that the sword even had a name. What a lonely existence. Lonelier by far than the isolation she had known. He remained unacknowledged, unvalidated. Unclaimed.
Rukia never so much as breathed a hint to the boy of Zangetsu's existence. Sode no Shirayuki's anger was sharp, clear. Zanpakutous were not mindless tools. But Rukia was training the boy to fight as if they were. So it was hardly his fault when he was beaten soundly, left for dead. And it was partly Rukia's fault. Sode no Shirayuki could hardly contain her anger. It was incredible that Rukia seemed altogether unharmed by the intensity of the emotion that hung like a heavy cloud upon her soul.
The anger flowed freely between Sode no Shirayuki and Rukia. They disputed the issue openly, talked about it as they had never talked about anything before. And perhaps Rukia did not listen to much of her zanpakutou's argument, but the very fact that the discussion was possible evidenced that they had reached a higher level of understanding, and Sode no Shirayuki could not help being pleased.
Rukia was learning to acknowledge her, even though she was powerless, weak. They were well on their way to becoming a perfect union of soul and power, discretion and killing instinct. This separation of soul was hard on them both. They were part of the same essential being, and yet they operated separately, apart from each other. Two parts of the same whole, each thinking for itself, apart from the whole.
Rukia took more notice of the zanpakutou residing in her soul. As they days wore on, and her small cell afforded the shinigami little to catch her interest, Sode no Shirayuki found Rukia's attention focused inward far more often than she was used to. It was gratifying, this change. Rukia appeared on the snowy plain frequently. They did not always speak, but it was enough that she was there.
As the end drew nearer, their understanding strengthened. Rukia seemed to have come to terms with her fate. She awaited it, untroubled, unconcerned. Her thoughts were often occupied by thoughts of the one who'd saved them from the darkness. The sunny, loud youth who never listened and often threw his power around like a clumsy stick. She had resigned herself to never see him again.
Sode no Shirayuki knew better. She fought against Rukia's apathy, threw her anger at the boundaries of the inner world violently. She would not end this way, crouched pathetically in a cell. She would not end powerless, weak, unable to defend herself. It was a disgrace to their very existence as warriors.
The sun would not be dimmed so easily. It burned with the strength of ten million flames; a small dousing would not put out its fire. Even the brilliance of the sokyoku appeared dark and insignificant next to its vibrance.
The moon cannot shine without the sun. Sode no Shirayuki was aware how vitally important the boy had become to them. He balanced them. Somehow, even with his sideways, twisted soul, he had become the center of their circle of orbit. Without the sun, there was no light. Without the sun, only crushing, despairing darkness awaited them. Without the sun, they would disappear.
Rukia underestimated the stubborn determination of that sun. In her mind, it burned only with the strength of a single, transient candle; a small spec of light shuddering and quaking at the passage of beings whose powers far outmatched its own. This narrow view of the boy, of his zanpakutou, was grossly mistaken. Somehow, Rukia had forgotten the brilliance of that sun upon their first meeting. She had forgotten how completely he had chased away the darkness, how easily he had overpowered them, even before he had absorbed their powers. She had let doubt and fear cloud her thoughts. And without the sun to banish it, the darkness came slinking back.
This darkness was far more serious than the first had been. This darkness was born of self-pity and hopelessness. This darkness was of Rukia's own making. Before, it had threatened only to crush them, to crush their will and spirit; this time, it threatened to completely obliterate them. The shadow of the Sokyoku had fallen over them.
Slowly, the underestanding slipped away. Rukia grew distant, wrapped up in her own regrets and memories. Memories in which Sode no Shirayuki had no place. Memories of people and times and places that she knew nothing about.
The time was almost upon them. Sode no Shirayuki berated Rukia for her cowardice, her doubt, her fear, her blindness. But her remonstrances fell on deaf ears, for Rukia would not listen. The zanpakutou was not sure that Rukia even realized she was ignoring her. The short raven-haired shinigami was completely wrapped up in the past. Her regrets overpowered Sode no Shirayuki's voice, filled her shinigami's ears so that she could not hear what her own soul was trying to tell her.
The time was upon them, and the blazing fury of the Sokyoku bore down upon them. They would have ended that way, would have met a coward's end, if not for the unextinguishable fire of the Black Sun. That which Sode no Shirayuki had always known was made clear to Rukia in those few moments.
The only thing that could extinguish the sun was the sun itself.
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